I did not awake from the refreshing sleep I so soundly fell into until late next morning. Upon attempting to rise, I found I was unable, from the dreadful stiffness of the parts that had been so terribly and unmercifully stretched. Unable to rise, I was obliged to remain in the scene of my undoing until the slaves came to awake me. With their assistance I got out of bed. Had you seen the sheets, you would indeed have pitied your poor friend. I found by the care, tenderness and respect with which I was treated that the Bey's orders respecting me must have been very particular.
I learned that he was not expected to return for some time. This news, being unexpected on my part^ acted as reprieve would upon a condemned criminal. It, of course, contributed considerably to soothe my wounded feelings; but at the end of a week, just as the flurry of my spirits had in some measure subsided to a degree of composure, I was again thrown into a state of alarm on being informed of his return, as well as his intention to pass that very night with me. I had just retired to bed when the communication was made to me, and his orders were scarcely delivered ere he was in my chamber. The news of his arrival had thrown me into a kind of stupor, from which I did not recover until his fierce kisses brought me to a sense of collection, when I found my second martyrdom was about to commence. You may be assured, from what I have already described of him, that I had nothing to expect from supplication or entreaties; still I did not fail to use them, supported by torrents of tears. These he paid no regard to, but took me in his arms, drawing me to his bosom and calling me foolish and silly to make such opposition to his pleasures. ‘Reason a little,' said he, drawing my lips to his, ‘consider the indispensable necessity that all loving creatures like yourself are under to lose the sweet flower I so lately gathered from you, which seems to have been so dear to you; consider the great end that nature has created you for, give over these unavailing tears, which only delay your tasting of the sweetest joys.
Then you talk about your virtue-pray, can you tell me in what it consists?' cried he, sucking my lips. I could only answer with tears. ‘Do you think,' said he, ‘if I enjoy you against your will, you are a bit the less virtuous? Or is it possible,' he continued, ‘that you are so simple as to believe that virtue depends upon any part of your beautiful body being a little larger or a little less. Of what consideration can it be to Ali whether this part is opened or unopened by man?' and to make me understand the part he meant, he forced his hand between my thighs, where his fiery touches left me in no doubt as to the part he alluded to.
He then was proceeding to place me in a situation convenient to satisfy his desires, but because I resisted his attempts, he flew upon me like a tiger, forcibly turned me on my back and divided my thighs; indeed, I found resistance of no avail.
The few days he had been absent seemed to have augmented his desires into a kind of frenzy. I cannot give you anything like a description of my sufferings as he now again forced his dreadful engine into me. The pain I felt was as cruel as when he first deflowered me. The chamber resounded with my shrieks. But he heeded them not; on the contrary, he increased the fury of his thrusts. Three times in the course of a quarter of an hour did I faint in his arms from the dreadful anguish.
On recovering I found, during my last insensibility, he had got off me. I cannot tell whether my tears and cries had made any impression on him, or what induced him to get out of bed; but he went to a closet in the room, where I plainly saw him anointing his instrument out of the contents of a small jar. After cleansing his hands, he returned to bed. It was not long ere he again got between my thighs. I lay trembling, expecting the cruel torment; but guess my astonishment when instead of experiencing the thrilling pain which had before always accompanied his penetration I felt him drive it into me up to the very hilt comparatively with no more pain than made me cry out two or three ‘Ohs'; but I still felt an extreme tightness accompanied with heated stretching. When I had received him up to the very quick, he tenderly kissed me, and asked if he hurt as much as before. I could not answer such a question, but I believe my blushes must have satisfied him on the point. Indeed, so great was the difference I now felt that I sustained this assault with very little suffering, until nature, unable longer to bear the tumult of pleasure with which the Dey seemed agitated, assisted him, and I for the first time felt with indescribable emotion something warm flowing from him in rapid streams, which deliciously cooled the parts he had so potently warmed. As I felt the last drop ejected from him, he sank on my bosom, without the least sign of animation, stretching himself out to his utmost length, which was the means of drawing his instrument from within me. It hung between my thighs quite bereft of all its power and erection, apparently as lifeless as its owner.
The reason of my escape from his first attack, the night I was brought to the harem, was now sufficiently explained to me. It was not long ere he recovered from his trance. I now perceived a wonderful attention in his behaviour. All his commanding and imperious looks had given way to respectful impassioned regards, although he still did just what he pleased; but there was some change in his manner of acting that I could not in any way account for. Remarkable as I found his attention, it was exceeded by what I soon experienced. Spite of my love for poor Henry, or the repugnance I naturally felt against the Dey as the violator of my chastity-spite of my sufferings in his furious embraces the difference of our religion and ages-can you credit what I felt, even at this early time of my undoing? I blush to write and confess it, but I am obliged to own I felt a voluptuous softness in his kisses, which acted as a balm, soothing me for the pains I had suffered. It is true my lips did not as yet return his pressures, but they submissively received them, inhaling every moment a dissolving poison, which quickly spread through my veins.
By this time I was aware, from the excessive hardness of his instrument, which was now lying on my belly, that it had recovered its wanton life and vigour, and presently the movement of his right hand gave notice I was again about to receive it But how shall I describe my emotion when, for the first time, I felt it enter me without the smallest particle of pain, with no more difficulty than the mere widening, as he penetrated and stretched each soft furrow, until the whole was completely sheathed and we reached the most complete union without my uttering anything more than a few tremulous sighs-which I could not prevent escaping me in view of the unutterable rapture which the fierce suction created, a sensation which, from being entirely new, was so deliriously indefinable. Do not think me a wanton for thus stating what I experienced. Believe me, I had not the power to resist the soft pleasure he now caused me to taste by the sweet to-and-fro friction of his voluptuous engine.
You, Sylvia, who are yet, I believe, an inexperienced maid, can have no conception of the seductive powers of this wonderful instrument of nature-this terror of virgins, but delight of women. Indeed there can be no description given of the pure delight, I may even say agony of enjoyment, excited by the excessive friction which the rapidity of its thrusts caused. I was soon taught that it was the uncontrolled master key of my feelings. My trembling it quickly banished; my confusion became breathless astonishment, which with the rapidity of lightning changed to a respect for my enjoyer so submissive in its nature that I already looked upon him as the disposer of my future destiny, and my soul became completely and securely resigned to him as he enjoyed my soft body and instructed me in the softest pleasure nature can participate in. My heart, my soul, my very being was melted by his thrilling thrusts, until at last my recollection failed me. I lost sight, and then again sank insensible in his arms, but from a very different cause from my other faintness.