‘Then he won’t mind,’ said Peter, too quietly, ‘if I go ahead and ring that bell. Right?’
Mr Andersz didn’t know about the bell, I realized. He didn’t understand. I watched him look at his son, watched the weight he always seemed to be carrying settle back around his shoulders, lock into place like a yoke. He bent forward, a little.
‘My son,’ he said. Uselessly.
So I shoved past him. I didn’t mean to push him, I just needed him out of the way, and anyway, he gave no resistance, bent back like a plant.
‘Peter, don’t do it,’ I said.
The eyes, black and mesmerizing, swung down on me. ‘Oh. Andrew. Forgot you were here.’
It was, of course, the cruelest thing he could have said, the source of his power over me and the reason I was with him — other than the fact that I liked him, I mean. It was the thing I feared most, in general, no matter where I was.
‘That bell. ’ I said, thinking of the dog’s head-cane, that deep and frozen voice, but thinking more, somehow, about my friend, rocketing away from us now at incomprehensible speed. Because that’s what he seemed to be doing, to me.
‘Wouldn’t it be great?’ said Peter. And then, unexpectedly, he grinned at me. He would never forget I was there, I realized. Couldn’t. I was all he had.
He turned and walked straight across the grass. The Mack sisters and Mr Andersz followed, all of them seeming to float in the long, wet green like seabirds skimming the surface of the ocean. I did not go with them. I had the feel of Jenny’s fingers in mine, and the sounds of flapping paper and whirling leaves in my ears, and Peter’s last, surprising smile floating in front of my eyes, and it was enough, too much, an astonishing Halloween.
‘This thing’s freezing,’ I heard Peter say, while his father and the Macks fanned out around him, facing the house and me. He was facing away, toward the trees. ‘Feel this.’ He held the tongue of the bell toward Kelly Mack, but she’d gone silent, now, watching him, and she shook her head.
‘Ready or not,’ he said. Then he reared back and rammed the bell-tongue home.
Instinctively, I flung my hands up to my ears, but the effect was disappointing, particularly to Peter. It sounded like a dinner bell, high, a little tinny, something that might call kids or a dog out of the water or the woods at bedtime. Peter slammed the tongue against the side of the bell one more time, dropped it, and the peal floated away over the Sound, dissipating into the salt air like seagull-cry.
For a few breaths, barely any time at all, we all stood where we were. Then Jenny Mack said, ‘Oh.’ I saw her hand snake out, grab her sister’s, and her sister looked up, right at me, I thought. The two Macks stared at each other. Then they were gone, hurtling across the yard, straight across that wide-open white eye, flying toward the forest.
Peter whirled, looked at me, and his mouth opened, a little. I couldn’t hear him, but I saw him murmur, ‘Wow,’ and a new smile exploded, one I couldn’t even fathom, and he was gone, too, sprinting for the trees, passing the Macks as they all vanished into the shadows.
‘Uh,’ said Mr Andersz, backing, backing, and his expression confused me most of all. He was almost laughing. ‘I’m so sorry,’ he said. ‘We didn’t realize. ’ He turned and chased after his son. And still, somehow, I thought they’d all been looking at me, until I heard the single, sharp thud from the porch behind me. Wood hitting wood. Cane-into-wood.
I didn’t turn around. Not then. What for? I knew what was behind me. Even so, I couldn’t get my legs to move, quite, not until I heard a second thud, closer this time, as though the thing on the porch had stepped fully out of the house, making its slow, steady way toward me. Stumbling, I kicked myself forward, put a hand down in the wet grass and the mud closed over it like a mouth. When I jerked it free, it made a disappointed, sucking sort of sound, and I heard a sort of sigh behind me, another thud, and I ran, all the way to the woods.
Hours later, we were still huddled together in the Andersz kitchen, wolfing down ho-hos and hot chocolate. Jenny and Kelly and Peter kept laughing, erupting into cloudbursts of excited conversation, laughing some more. Mr Andersz laughed, too, as he boiled more water and spooned marshmallows into our mugs and told us.
The man the bell had called forth, he said, was Mr Paars’s brother. He’d been coming for years, taking care of Mr Paars after he got too sick to look after himself, because he refused to move into a rest home or even his brother’s home.
‘The Lincoln,’ Peter said, and Mr Andersz nodded.
‘God, poor man. He must have been inside when you all got there. He must have thought you were coming to rob the place, or vandalize it, and he went out back.’
‘We must have scared the living shit out of him,’ Peter said happily.
‘Almost as much as we did you,’ said Kelly, and everyone was shouting, pointing, laughing again.
‘Mr Paars had been dead for days when they found him,’ Mr Andersz told us. ‘The brother had to go away, and he left a nurse in charge, but the nurse got sick, I guess, or Mr Paars wouldn’t let her in, or something. Anyway, it was pretty awful when the brother came back. That’s why the windows were all open. It’ll take weeks, I bet, to air that place out.’
I sat, and I sipped my cocoa, and I watched my friends chatter and eat and laugh and wave their arms around, and it dawned on me, slowly, that none of them had seen. None of them had heard. Not really. I almost said something five different times, but I never quite did, I think because of the way we all were, just for that hour, that last, magic night: triumphant, and windswept, and defiant, and together. Like real friends. Almost.
That was the last time, of course. The next summer, the Macks moved to Vancouver, although they’d slowly slipped away from Peter and me anyway by then. Mr Andersz lost his job — there was an incident, apparently, he just stopped teaching and sat down on the floor in the front of his classroom and swallowed an entire box of chalk, stick by stick — and wound up working in the little caged-in accounting office at the used-car lot in the wasteland down by the Ballard Bridge. And slowly, over a long period of time, it became more exciting, even for me, to talk about Peter than it was to be with him.
Soon, I think, my mother is going to get sick of staring at the images repeating over and over on our tv screen, the live reports from the rubble of my school and the yearbook photo of Peter and the video of him being stuffed into a police car and the names streaming across the bottom of the screen like a tornado warning, except too late. For the fifteenth time, at least, I see Steve Rourke’s name go by. I should have told him, I thought, should have warned him. But he should have known. I wonder why my name isn’t up there, why Peter didn’t come after me. The answer, though, is obvious. He forgot I was there. Or he wants me to think he did.
It doesn’t matter. Any minute, my mother’s going to get up and go to bed, and she’s going to tell me I should, too, and that we’ll leave here, we’ll get away and never come back.
‘Yes,’ I’ll say. ‘Soon.’
‘All those children,’ she’ll say. Again. ‘Sweet Jesus, I can’t believe it. Andrew.’ She’ll drop her head on my shoulder and throw her arms around me and cry.
But by then, I won’t be thinking about the streaming names, the people I knew who are people no longer, or what Peter might have been thinking tonight. I’ll be thinking, just as I am now, about Peter in the grass outside the Paars house, at the moment he realized what we’d done to him. The way he stood there, vibrating. We didn’t make him what he was. Not the Macks, not his dad, not me — none of us. But it’s like he said: God puts something shaped like that in the world, and then He expects us not to ring it.