17
Harry found me there, and he lets me use his garage as a 18
studio and to sleep.”
19
“So how do you know Narciss?” I asked.
20
“I was walking down the street,” he said, tossing his 21
locks for effect. “Just walking and I see the most beautiful 22
quilts hanging in her window. The designs are like the 23
ones that I paint and I had to see them, touch them . . .”
24
There was a passion building up in Geraldo, and I 25
couldn’t help but wonder what all he was touching up in 26
Narciss Gully’s store.
S 27
“I know,” I said for no reason, “she sells quilts.”
R 28
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1
“Sells?” he sneered. “It’s not a hot-dog stand. This is art.
2
She collects, she shares, she teaches. Sometimes someone 3
might pay for learning something, to live with beauty.
4
But she does not just sell quilts.”
5
I’ve never really gotten the knack of talking to artists.
6
You can’t talk to them about how much it pays or about 7
what you think you like. If I think a painting is ugly, 8
somebody just tells me that I don’t understand. If I think 9
a painting is good, they tell me the same thing. It’s like 10
artists see a different place, a higher place, whereas I’m on 11
the level of some stray dog who only knows how to hunt 12
for pussy and food in a world that’s black and white.
13
Geraldo sneered at me again and turned to his work.
14
I considered kicking him out of my house but then 15
thought better of it. I didn’t want trouble with Narciss 16
Gully. Just the opposite — I had begun to have deep feel-17
ings for the antique dealer. Every night after talking to 18
Bethany, I would have lascivious dreams about Narciss.
19
In those dreams we always started at the dinner table, ei-20
ther in a restaurant or at someone’s house, maybe a bar-21
becue or a picnic. No matter where we ended up, we 22
always started out eating. I’d bring the wine and she was 23
barely dressed. She was shy about her small breasts and 24
slender thighs, but I would console her by stroking her 25
body and rubbing my face against her magnificent skin.
26
In these dreams my excitement grew and grew, but always 27 S
before we could embrace, something happened to inter-28 R
rupt. The waiter would arrive with the check, a down-92
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pour fell on our picnic, someone would come to the 1
door — her mother or Clarance wanting to apologize.
2
No matter who it was I’d get so angry that I’d wake up 3
with a powerful erection. Awake, I couldn’t recapture the 4
ardor of my dreams. And without passion there was no 5
desire for the consummation of my lust.
6
“Mr. Blakey?” She had come in behind me while I 7
watched her assistant and thought of her.
8
“Oh,” I said. “Hi, Narciss.”
9
“Hello, Geraldo,” she said, having satisfied her social 10
obligation with me. “Have you been here long?”
11
“Not long,” the godling reported to his muse. He was 12
holding up a terrible painting done by my aunt Blythe.
13
“Is this really worth the film?”
14
“We’ll do the paintings first,” she said. “And after that 15
the clothes and then the hard objects.”
16
The crestfallen look on Geraldo’s face was worth a 17
whole week of hard labor.
18
“Excuse us, Mr. Blakey, but we’re going to be working 19
in here for a while.”
20
“If you call me Charles, I’ll let you alone.”
21
She smiled without answering and I left, grinning 22
broadly at the sour-faced Geraldo.
23
24
25
The next few hours were tough for me. I was reading a 26
book but wanting a drink. The book was about a prince S 27
who had been stripped of his memory and exiled from a R 28
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1
magical kingdom to mundane Earth. There were agents 2
trying to kill him, but in his confused state he couldn’t 3
understand why. I liked the story because I often felt like 4
that, like I was being persecuted but didn’t know why.
5
Why was I alive and seeing and thinking and dreaming if 6
everything was just stoplights and televisions, tests and 7
failures, red wine and death?
8
But I didn’t want a drink to escape, not then anyway. I 9
needed a drink because I wanted to ask Narciss for that 10
rain check for the dinner we’d missed.
11
The first obstacle would be asking the question in the 12
presence of the adoring Geraldo’s imposing physique. But 13
I got over that. I could see that Narciss wasn’t all that in-14
terested in the Dominican artist. When he strutted and 15
preened, she hardly noticed. He was actually just an assis-16
tant.
17
But even when I saw that he was no competitor, I still 18
held back.
19
After being nearly crushed to death and then incarcer-20
ated in a mental hospital, the prince escaped and was run-21
ning. I decided to go in and check on my guests.
22
“How’s it going?” I asked, entering the room.
23
Geraldo sneered but Narciss took off her glasses and 24
smiled.
25
“We’re halfway through it,” she said. “It’s taking longer 26
than usual because I’m taking a separate slide shot. Some 27 S
of these pieces are so wonderful that I’ll have to send 28 R
them for projection.”
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The Man in My Basement
“Oh,” I said. “Good. Good. Would you like to get d-1
dinner after this?”
2
Just that one small stammer made me want to bite off 3
my tongue. One double skip on the letter d and I’d told 4
Narciss all about my fears and weaknesses. Geraldo was 5
standing behind me, but I’m sure he was grinning at my 6
failed manhood. The smile on Narciss’s lips I took to be 7
pity and pleasure at the discomfort of a child.
8
“I’m sorry, Charles, but I have plans,” she said.
9
“Uh-huh.” I nodded, putting an upbeat tone to the 10
grunt and realizing too late that that made me sound even 11
more pitiable.
12
“But maybe we can have coffee or something after we’re 13
finished here. There are a couple of things that we need to 14
discuss.”
15
“No problem. Just as long as we’re through before seven 16
’cause you know I got to get out and eat something.”
17
Every word out of my mouth seemed calculated to make 18
me look more like a fool.
19
I went back into the kitchen feeling as if I were de-20
scending into a pit. Every step brought me lower. And all 21
it was was just that double d. A stuttering skip and my 22
fingers were tingling, the light in the room refused to il-23
luminate. I didn’t feel hungry; I didn’t want a drink. My 24
months of unemployment, my loneliness, my drunken 25
poverty all came to the surface then. I would have liked to 26