Truzhnisha saw at once, of course, how disappointed Nafai was. "How should I have known you were coming home for supper tonight?"
"We do sometimes."
"So I take your father's money and buy food and prepare it to be eaten hot and fresh on the table, and then nobody comes home at all. It happens as often as not, and then the meal is wasted because I prepare it differently for freezing."
"Yes, you overcook everything," said Issib.
"So it will be nice and soft for your feeble jaws," she said.
Issib growled at her-in the back of his throat, like a dog. It was the way they played with each other. Only Truzhya could play with him by exaggerating his weakness; only with Truzhya did Issib ever grunt or growl, in mockery of a manly strength that would always be out of his reach.
"Your frozen stuff is all right, anyway," said Nafai.
"Thank you," she said. Her exaggerated tone told him that she was offended at what he had said. But he had meant it sincerely, as a compliment. Why did everybody always think he was being sarcastic or insulting when he was just trying to be nice? Somewhere along the way he really had to learn what the signals were that other people were forever detecting in his speech, so that they were always so sure that he was trying to be offensive.
"Your father is out in the stables, but he wants to talk to the both of you."
"Separately?" asked Issib.
"Now, slnpuld I know this? Should I form you into a line outside his door?"
"Yes, you should," said Issib. Then he snapped his jaws at her, like a dog biting. "If you weren't such a worthless old goat."
"Mind who you're calling worthless, now," she said, laughing.
Nafai watched in awe. Issib could say genuinely insulting things, and she took it as play. Nafai complimented her cooking, and she took it as an insult. I should go out in the desert and become a wilder, thought Nafai, Except, of course, that only women could be wilders, protected from injury by both custom and law. In fact, on the desert a wilder woman was treated better than in the city-desert folk wouidn't lay a hand on the holy women, and they left them water and food when they noticed them. But a man living alone out on the desert was likely to be robbed and killed within a day. Besides, thought Nafai, I haven't the faintest idea of how to live in the desert. Father and Elemak do, but even then they only do it by carrying a lot of supplies with them. Out on the desert without supplies, they'd die as fast as I would. The difference is, they'd be surprised that they were dying, because they think they know how to survive there.
"Are you awake, Nafai?" asked Issib.
"Mm? Yes, of course."
"So you plan to keep that food sitting in front of you as a pet?"
Nafai looked down and saw that Truzhya had slid a loaded plate in front of him. "Thanks," he said.
"Giving food to you is like leaving it on the graves of your ancestors," said Truzhya.
They don't say thanks," said Nafai.
"O h, he said thanks," she grumbled.
"Well what am I supposed to say?" asked Nafai.
"Just eat your supper," said Issib.
"I want to know what was wrong with my saying thanks!"
"She was joking with you," said Issib. "She w&splaying. You've got no sense of humor, Nyef."
Nafai took a bite and chewed it angrily. So she was joking. How was he supposed to know that?
The gate swung open. A scuff of sandals, and then a door opening and closing immediately. It was Father, then, since he was the only one in the family who could reach his room without coming in view of the kitchen door. Nafai started to get up, to go see him.
"Finish your supper first," said Issib.
"He didn^t say it was an emergency," added Truzh-msha.
"He didn't say it wasn^" answered Nafai. He continued on out of the room.
Behind him, Issib called out. "Tell him I'll be there in a second."
Nafai stepped out into the courtyard, crossed in front of the gate, and entered the door into Father's public room. He wasn't there. Instead he was back in the library, with a book in the computer display that Nafai instantly recognized as the Testament of the Oversoul, perhaps the oldest of the holy writings, from a time so ancient that, according to the stories, the men's and women's religions were the same.
"She comes to you in the shadows of sleep," Nafai said aloud, reading from the first line on the screen.
"She whispers to you in the fears of your heart," Father answered.
"In the bright awareness of your eyes and in the dark stupor of your ignorance, there is her wisdom," Nafai continued.
"Only in her silence are you alone. Only in her silence are you wrong. Only in her silence should you despair." Father sighed. "It's all here, isn't it, Nafai?"
"The Oversoul isn't a man or a woman," said Nafai.
"Right, yes, of course, you know all about what the Oversoul is,"
Father's tone was so weary that Nafai decided it wasn't worth arguing theology with him tonight. "You wanted to see me."
"You and Issib."
"He'll be here in a second."
As if on cue, Issib drifted through the door, still eating some cheesebread.
"Thank you for bringing crumbs into my library," said Father.
"Sorry," said Issib; he reversed direction and started floating out the door.
"Come back," said Father. "I don't care about the crumbs."
Issib came back.
"There's talk all over Basilica about the two of you."
Nafai traded glances with Issib. "We've just been doing some library research."
"The women are saying that the Oversoul is speaking to no one but you."
"We aren't exactly getting clear messages from it," said Nafai. .
"Mostly we've just been monopolizing it by stimulating its aversive reflexes," said Issib.
"Mmm," said Father.
"But we've stopped," said Issib. "That's why we came home."
"We didn't want to interfere," said Nafai.
"Nafai prayed, though, on the way home," said Issib. "It was pretty impressive stuff."
Father sighed. "Oh, Nafai, if you've learned anything from me, couldn't you have learned that jabbing yourself and bleeding all over the place has nothing to do with prayer to the Oversoul?"
"Right," said Nafai. "This from the man who suddenly comes home with a vision of fire on a rock. I thought all bets were off."
"I got my vision without bleeding," said Father. "But never mind. I was hoping that the two of you might have received something from the Oversoul that would help me."
Nafai shook his head.
"No," said Issib. "Mostly what we got from the Oversoul was that stupor of thought. It was trying to keep us from thinking forbidden thoughts."
"Well, that's it, then," said Father. "I'm on my own."
"On your own with what?" asked Issib.
"Gaballufix sent word to me through Elemak today. It seems that Gaballufix is as unhappy as I am about the situation in Basilica today. If he had known that this war wagon business would cause such controversy he would never have begun it. He said that he wanted me to set up a meeting between him and Roptat. All Gaballufix really wants now is to find a way to back down without losing face-he says that all he needs is for Roptat also to back down, so that we don't make an alliance with anybody."
"So have you set up a meeting with Roptat?"
"Yes," said Father. "At dawn, at the coolhouse east of Market Gate."
"It sounds to me," said Nafai, "like Gaballufix has come around to the City Party's way of thinking."
"That's how it sounds" said Father.