Above the motor scooter’s sputter, the grateful boyfriend shouted, “Sir, I will put you in touch with a man. Listen to him and he will deliver you.” Then the dust cloud of destiny swallowed up the guerrilla bride-to-be and groom.
The go-between turned out to be a clubfooted and cauliflower-eared middle-aged man. The combination of deformities, no doubt congenital, had nevertheless earned him a reputation for ferocity and an indifference to inflicted suffering. He appeared on the front porch early one Saturday afternoon. He didn’t come straight to the point. For the first half-hour he said very little and concentrated instead on the sweet almond-stuffed turnovers that the Venkatesan family had shaped and fried all day for a religious festival they’d be attending later that afternoon.
“You have, perhaps, some news for me?” Mr. Venkatesan asked shyly as he watched the man help himself to a chilled glass of mango fool. “Some important information, no?”
“Excuse me, sir,” the man protested. “I know that you are a teacher and that therefore you are in the business of improving the mind of man. But forthrightness is not always a virtue. Especially in these troubled times.”
The man’s furtiveness was infectious, and Mr. Venkatesan, without thinking, thinned his voice to a hiss. “You are going over my options with me, no?”
“Options!” the man sneered. Then he took out a foreign-looking newspaper from a shopping bag. On a back page of the paper was a picture of three dour sahibs fishing for lobster. “You get my meaning, sir? They have beautiful coves in Nova Scotia. They have beautiful people in the Canadian Maritimes.”
On cushiony skates and with clean, cool winds buoying him from behind, Mr. Venkatesan glided all the way into Halifax, dodging posses of border police. He married a girl with red, dimpled cheeks, and all winter she made love to him under a goose-down quilt. Summers he set lobster traps. Editors of quarterlies begged to see his poetry.
“Beautiful people, Canadians,” he agreed.
“Not like the damn Americans!” The go-between masticated sternly. “They are sending over soldiers of fortune and suchlike to crush us.”
Mr. Venkatesan, wise in ways of middlemen, asked, “This means you’re not having a pipeline to America?”
The agent dipped into a bowl of stale fried banana chips.
“No matter. The time has come for me to leave.”
The next day, Sunday, the man came back to find out how much Mr. Venkatesan might be willing to pay for a fake passport / airline tickets / safe houses en route package deal. Mr. Venkatesan named a figure.
“So you are not really anxious to exit?” the man said.
Mr. Venkatesan revised his figure. He revised the figure three more times before the go-between would do anything more human than sigh at him.
He was being taken by a mean, mocking man who preyed on others’ dreams. He was allowing himself to be cheated. But sometime that spring the wish to get away — to flee abroad and seize the good life as had his San Jose cousin — had deepened into sickness. So he was blowing his life’s savings on this malady. So what?
The man made many more trips. And on each trip, as Mr. Venkatesan sat the man down on the best rattan chair on the balcony, through the half-open door that led into the hallway he saw the women in his family gather in jittery knots. They knew he was about to forsake them.
Every brave beginning, in these cramped little islands, masked a secret betrayal. To himself, Mr. Venkatesan would always be a sinner.
Mr. Venkatesan threw himself into the planning. He didn’t trust the man with the cauliflower ears. Routes, circuitous enough to fool border guards, had to be figured out. He could fly to Frankfurt via Malta, for instance, then hole up in a ship’s cargo hold for the long, bouncy passage on Canadian seas. Or he could take the more predictable (and therefore, cheaper but with more surveillance) detours through the Gulf Emirates.
The go-between or travel agent took his time. Fake travel documents and work permits had to be printed up. Costs, commissions, bribes had to be calculated. On each visit, the man helped himself to a double peg of Mr. Venkatesan’s whiskey.
In early September, three weeks after Mr. Venkatesan had paid in full for a roundabout one-way ticket to Hamburg and for a passport impressive with fake visas, the travel agent stowed him in the damp, smelly bottom of a fisherman’s dinghy and had him ferried across the Palk Strait to Tuticorin in the palm-green tip of mainland India.
Tuticorin was the town Mr. Venkatesan’s ancestors had left to find their fortunes in Ceylon’s tea-covered northern hills. The irony struck him with such force that he rocked and tipped the dinghy, and had to be fished out of the sea.
The Friends of the Tigers were waiting in a palm grove for him. He saw their flashlights and smelled their coffee. They gave him a dry change of clothes, and though both the shirt and the jacket were frayed, they were stylishly cut. His reputation as an intellectual and killer (he hoped it wasn’t true) of a Buddhist policeman had preceded him. He let them talk; it was not Venkatesan the schoolmaster they were praising, but some mad invention. Where he was silent from confusion and fatigue, they read cunning and intensity. He was happy to put himself in their hands; he thought of them as fate’s helpers, dispatched to see him through his malady. That night one of them made up a sleeping mat for him in the the back room of his shuttered grocery store. After that they passed him from back room to back room. He spent pleasant afternoons with them drinking sweet, frothy coffee and listening to them plan to derail trains or blow up bus depots. They read his frown as skepticism and redoubled their vehemence. He himself had no interest in destruction, but he listened to them politely.
When it was safe to move on, the Friends wrote out useful addresses in Frankfurt, London, Toronto, Miami. “Stay out of refugee centers,” they advised. But an old man with broken dentures who had been deported out of Hamburg the year before filled him in on which refugee centers in which cities had the cleanest beds, just in case he was caught by the wily German police. “I shan’t forget any of you,” Mr. Venkatesan said as two Friends saw him off at the train station. The train took him to Madras; in Madras he changed trains for Delhi where he boarded an Aeroflot flight for Tashkent. From Tashkent he flew to Moscow. He would like to have told the story of his life to his two seat mates — already the break from family and from St. Joe’s seemed the stuff of adventure novels — but they were two huge and grim Uzbeks with bushels of apricots and pears wedged on the floor, under the seat, and on their laps. The cabin was noisier than the Jaffna local bus with squawking chickens and drunken farmers. He communed instead with Arnold and Keats. In Moscow the airport officials didn’t bother to look too closely at his visa stamps, and he made it to Berlin feeling cocky.
At Schönefeld Airport, three rough-looking Tamil men he’d not have given the time of day to back home in Trinco grappled his bags away from him as soon as he’d cleared customs. “This is only a piss stop for you, you lucky bastard,” one of them said. “You get to go on to real places while hard-working fuckers like us get stuck in this hellhole.”
He had never heard such language. Up until a week ago, he would have denied the Tamil language even possessed such words. The man’s coarseness shocked Mr. Venkatesan, but this was not the moment to walk away from accomplices.
The expatriate Tamils took him, by bus, to a tenement building — he saw only Asians and Africans in the lobby — and locked him from the outside in a one-room flat on the top floor. An Algerian they did business with, they said, would truck him over the border into Hamburg. He was not to look out the window. He was not to open the door, not even if someone yelled, “Fire!” They’d be back at night, and they’d bring him beer and rolls.