The body was an indistinct shape shrouded by crimson-spattered linen sheets. The stench of blood and death would have been enough to make me gag if my throat hadn’t been so constricted. I removed my Bogart and placed it over my heart to smother the reverberations that hammered against my chest.
Esmeralda grimaced as she pulled the sheets back. “She was found like this less than an hour ago. Her body was still slightly warm.”
My jaw clenched until my teeth ached. “Desiree.”
Esmeralda’s eyes glistened as she continued to gaze at the corpse.” Yes. You were one of her regulars. Before you… changed.”
Desiree had the face of a supermodel and the body of a professional dancer. Combine that with the allure of a movie starlet and it equaled a lethal combination of looks and style too much for many a man to resist. Why she worked tricks in a cathouse instead of playing some rich chump over for diamonds and furs was something I never understood. Guess something inside of her died hard along the way, some hard luck forced her onto a detour she never pulled out of.
None of that mattered anymore.
Esmeralda studied my reaction. Her eyes widened. “This is not the first. You’ve seen this kind of killing recently.”
My fists tightened as I reluctantly nodded. “Just the other night. Girl I knew was murdered just like this. The cuts on the face, the slit throat… ” I drew a shuddering breath. “Just like this.”
“So.” Esmeralda’s voice was emotionless, but her eyes accused me all the same. “This is connected to you, then.”
I roughly swallowed the lump that swelled in my throat. “I’m afraid so, Esmeralda.”
“A woman killer, then.”
I glanced at her. “That’s what Natasha said. How do you figure?”
“It makes sense now. Why she cut Desiree’s face. Her mouth. The killer wanted to disfigure her beauty, slash the mouth that kissed you in passion. This killer was your lover once. Now she sends you a message through the women you’ve had since her.”
I heard someone groan as though in pain. It took a second to realize the sound came from me. My Bogart slipped from my hands and hit the floor.
Esmeralda quickly pulled the sheets back over Desiree’s tortured face. I edged backward, unable to take my eyes from the shrouded figure. My legs brushed against the edge of a chair. I fell into it, slumping against the cushions. My hands shook as I withdrew my deck of smokes and placed a gasper between my lips.
“Here.” Esmeralda strode over with a silver-gilded lighter. I let the smoke smolder in my lungs for a moment while I cradled my head. The faces of Scarlett and Desiree flickered across my vision, bloody smiles on their faces. It was my fault they lay still and lifeless, their last breaths taken in suffering and agony.
It was my fault.
A strong hand cupped my chin and tilted it upward. I gazed at Esmeralda’s stern face through a blurry haze. She shook her head.
“This will not do. You look as if you can barely stand. You must be strong now, Mick. You are not the man I knew not so long ago, when you used to frequent here.”
“I know, sweetheart.” I gently removed her hand and exhaled a stream of smoke toward the floor. “I got better.”
“You got weaker.” Her face displayed no sympathy as she placed a gasper in a diamond-encrusted holder and lit it. Her dark eyes glimmered with passion, the insatiable need for the assurance of blood. “The man I knew would already be on the streets looking for the fils de pute that would dare to do this.”
“I’m not that man anymore, darlin’. I can’t go around killing folks at will. You chase blood long enough and it’s yours that ends up painting the streets.”
“You cannot change who you are, Mick. You might fool your little girlfriend into thinking you are ready to clean up and settle down, but we both know the truth.” Her eyes bore deeply into mine, her lips parted as she exhaled a hazy cloud. “You’re a killer of bad men. And as long as bad men need killing, you’ll never be able to settle down. Violence is in your nature and you release it on those who have it coming. There is no shame in that.”
“Maybe you’re right.” I was surprised to admit it out loud. But even though her words rattled me, it was as though the realization lifted an enormous weight from my shoulders.
“I’ve tried to pretend I could be the good guy, but deep inside I know how the cards are dealt. Decent people can’t survive in this city. There’s something about this place that tears at you, forces you to face who you really are. I’ve always said if you wanna make it in New Haven you gotta be meaner than the streets are. Maybe the truth is I’m just as bad as the scum I’ve put down.”
“Do not say such things.” Smoke trails followed her dismissive gesture. “You are different from the others because you live by a code, Mick. That is the only reason why I trust you.”
I didn’t reply. There were no words to be said. There was nothing I could do to bring Scarlett and Desiree back. They were gone, and all I could do was place them with the rest of the ghosts that haunted my sober moments.
But I damn sure could do something to the person who took their lives.
I took a last look at the shrouded body as I rose out of the chair. “Why in the hell did you want Natasha to see this?”
“Because she needs to know.”
“Know what?”
“The price of being near you.” Esmeralda’s words burned with undisguised anger. “This is what comes of being in your company, Mick. Death trails you like a shadow and if this girl is to be with you then she must know. Next time it might be her laying there, her dead eyes staring into yours. Is that what you want?”
“No.” The reply was raw in my throat as I envisioned her words.
“Then let her go. She needs to live her life away from you. She seems like a nice girl. She deserves a good man.”
“There are no good men in New Haven.”
Esmeralda glared. “You know what I mean. Let the girl go, for her sake.”
I bent and picked up my Bogart. Placed it on my head and tilted the brim over my eyes. “I gotta go, Esmeralda.”
“Where?”
“To kill some bad men.”
“This murderer is no man, Mick.”
I crushed my gasper in the antique ashtray beside the chair. “Well then I guess I’ll kill her too.”
Esmeralda smiled.
“What happened, Mick?”
Natasha searched my face. I was pretty sure I wore a rather murderous expression, which to be fair was enough to warrant her anxiousness.
“Let’s go. We’re outta here.” My step never faltered as I strode past Esmeralda’s office. I had to get away from the condemning atmosphere. Every corner seemed to whisper with Desiree’s accusing voice.
“Mick.” Benny glanced up from viewing his holoband. “Uncle Flacco wants an update. Says to meet him at his safe house in the Docks.”
“You know where it’s at?”
“Yeah.”
“Ok.” I jerked my head toward the exit.
“Mick.” Natasha nearly had to jog in order to match my stride. “Why won’t you tell me what happened?”
“Cause you don’t wanna know what happened, Natasha. Some things are better off left alone, understand?”
I gratefully pushed open the exit doors and stepped out in the welcoming stench of New Haven gutters and smog. The clamor of traffic, sirens, and the morning bustle helped clear my mind and hone my focus. Things were as bad as I’d seen them get, but I was still walking and still had the Mean Ol’ Broad tucked in her holster under my arm. I’d go with those odds any given day.