Выбрать главу

“Zaim Bey, your people bring one delivery, and then we never see them again. Cases of empties have been sitting in the back for weeks.”

“You’re right, our Istanbul distributors are useless,” said Zaim. He turned to me. “You know this business. How is Satsat managing? What can we do about our distribution problem?”

“Forget about Satsat,” I said. “Osman set up a new firm with Turgay, and he’s done us in. Since my father died, Osman cares only for money.”

Zaim did not care for Sadi hearing us talk about our private failures. “Bring us each a double Kulüp raki with ice on the side, would you? That would be best,” he said. When Sadi left he frowned as if waiting for an answer. “Your beloved brother, Osman, wants to do business with us, too.”

“I’d rather stay out of that,” I said. “I’m not about to take it amiss if you choose to do business with Osman. Business is business. What other news, Zaim?”

He knew at once that I meant society news, and hoping to cheer me up, he offered quite a few amusing stories. Güven the Ship Sinker had run a rusty cargo ship aground, this time between Tuzla and Bayramoğlu. Güven specialized in rotting, polluting derelicts that had been decommissioned. He would buy them abroad at scrap prices and with the help of his contacts in the government and the state bureaucracy fiddled the paperwork to make them seem valuable and seaworthy vessels; by bribing the right people he could then take out interest-free loans from the Turkish Maritime Development Fund, putting the ships up as collateral, and soon thereafter he’d sink them and receive big payouts from the state-owned Başak Insurance. And so by the time he’d sold the beached cargo ship to his scrap yard friends, he’d made himself a pot of money without ever getting up from his desk. Plied with a few drinks, Güven would brag to his friends at the club that he was “the biggest shipowner who’d never been aboard a ship.”

“The scandal erupted not because of this chicanery, but because he ran the ship aground just next to the summer home he had bought his mistress, so that he wouldn’t have to travel far to see the shipwreck. But the residents of those beach and summer homes raised an awful hue and cry over his having polluted the water. Even his mistress couldn’t stop crying, apparently.”

“What else?”

“The Avunduks and the Mengirlis invested everything with Deniz the Banker and were wiped out, and that, by the way, is why the Avunduks have pulled their daughter out of Notre Dame de Sion and are trying to marry her off.”

“That girl is hideous. Good luck to them,” I said. “On top of that-who would trust somebody called Deniz the Banker? I’ve never even heard of him.”

“Do you have any money with brokers?” asked Zaim. “Is there a reputable one you know and trust?”

Having arrived at this new profession after running kebab restaurants, truck tire depots, and even lottery shops, these bankers were offering such ludicrously high interest rates that it was clear they would not stay in business indefinitely. But so ubiquitous and seductive was their advertising that they’d taken in enough cash to stay afloat temporarily, because even those who derided and exposed them in the press-among them even economics professors who saw them clearly as con men-were apparently dazzled enough by the advertised rates to invest their own money, “just for a month or two.”

“I don’t have any money with brokers,” I said. “Our companies don’t either.”

“With those returns it seems idiotic to put money into an ordinary business. To think if I’d given Kastelli the money I’ve sunk into Meltem, I’d have doubled my investment by now and avoided these headaches.”

Whenever I remember that conversation we had among the crowd at Fuaye, it seems to me as empty and meaningless as it did that day. But then as now I did not blame the general idiocy-or more politely, the general unreflectiveness-of the world in which my story takes place, but rather I imputed a sad want of seriousness, which could never trouble me unduly, and more typically moved me to laugh, to embrace it with pride.

“Is Meltem really not making money?”

I’d said this without intending a dig, but Zaim took offense.

“It’s all riding on Papatya-what else can we do?” he said. “I just hope she doesn’t embarrass us. I’ve arranged for her to sing Meltem’s jingle accompanied by the Silver Leaves at Mehmet and Nurcihan’s wedding. All the press will be there at the Hilton.”

I fell silent for a moment. I had heard absolutely nothing about Mehmet and Nurcihan’s impending wedding at the Hilton, and I was crushed.

“I know you won’t be coming,” said Zaim. “But I figured you’d have heard about it by now.”

“Why wasn’t I invited?”

“Oh, there were endless discussions. As you might have guessed, Sibel doesn’t want to see you: ‘If he’s going to be there, I’m not coming’ is what she said. And after all, Sibel is Nurcihan’s best friend. She’s even the one who introduced Nurcihan to Mehmet, don’t forget.”

“I’m a good friend of Mehmet’s,” I said. “You could also say that I had as much to do with introducing them.”

“Don’t make too much of this-it will only upset you.”

“Why do Sibel’s feelings take precedence?” I said, knowing even as I spoke that I had no right.

“Look, my friend, everyone sees Sibel as a woman wronged,” said Zaim. “You got engaged to her, and after living with her in a Bosphorus yali, and sharing the same bed, you abandoned her. For the longest time there was talk of nothing else, and you’d have thought they were speaking of some evil djinn the way mothers discussed the scandal with their daughters. Sibel really did not mind, but everyone felt very sorry for her all the same, and naturally they were very angry at you. You can’t be indignant that they’re on Sibel’s side now.”

“I’m not indignant,” I said indignantly.

We downed our rakıs and began to eat our fish, and it was the first time Zaim and I had eaten a meal at Fuaye and fallen silent. I listened to the waiter’s hurried footsteps, the steady crackle of laughter and conversation, the clatter of knives and forks. I angrily vowed never to come back, even as I thought how much I loved this place, and how I had no other world.

Zaim said that he wanted to buy a speedboat that summer but that before doing so he needed to find a suitable outboard motor, though there were none to be found in the stores in Karaköy.

“That’s enough, now. Stop looking so glum,” he said suddenly. “Nobody should get this upset over missing a wedding at the Hilton. I’m sure you’ve been to one?”

“My friends have turned their backs on me because of Sibel-I don’t like that.”

“No one’s turned their back on you.”

“Fine, but what if the decision had been up to you? What would you have done?”

“What decision?” said Zaim, in a way that seemed disingenuous. “Oh, now I see what you mean. Of course, I would have wanted you to come. You and I always have such fun at weddings.”

“This is not about fun; it’s something much deeper.”

“Sibel is very lovely; she’s a very special girl,” said Zaim. “You broke her heart. Not only that-in front of everyone, you put her in a very precarious situation. Instead of pulling a long face and glaring at me, why don’t you just accept what you did, Kemal? Take it on the chin and then it will be much easier for you to return to your real life, and before you know it, all this will be forgotten.”

“So you consider me guilty, too?” I said. I knew it wouldn’t be long before I began to regret persevering in this, but I couldn’t help myself. “If we insist virginity is still so important how can we pretend we’re modern and European? Let’s be honest with ourselves, at least.”

“Everyone is honest about this… Your mistake was imposing your view on someone else. It might not be important to you, or to me. But it goes without saying that in this country a young woman’s virginity is of the utmost importance to her, no matter how modern and European she is.”