“Did I?”
The Admiral said with a kind of awe: “You killed him, Allie. Why did you want his blood on your hands? Why?” His own hand reached for her, gropingly, and paused in midair. He looked at her as if he had fathered a strange, evil thing.
She bowed her head in silence. I answered for her: “She’d stolen the Chardin for him and met his conditions. But then she saw that he couldn’t get away, or if he did he’d be brought back, and questioned. She couldn’t be sure he’d keep quiet about Hugh. This afternoon she made sure. The second murder comes easier.”
“No!” She shook her blond head violently. “I didn’t murder Hugh. I hit him with something, I didn’t intend to kill him. He struck me first, he struck me, and then I hit him back.”
“With a deadly weapon, a metal fist. You hit at him twice with it. The first blow missed and left its mark on the doorframe. The second blow didn’t miss.”
“But I didn’t mean to kill him. Hilary knew I didn’t mean to kill him.”
“How would he know? Was he there?”
“He was downstairs in his flat. When he heard Hugh fall, he came up. Hugh was still alive. He died in Hilary’s car, when we were starting for the hospital. Hilary said he’d help me to cover up. He took that horrible fist and threw it into the sea.
“I hardly knew what I was doing by that time. Hilary did it all. He put the body in Hugh’s car and drove it up the mountain. I followed in his car and brought him back. On the way back he told me why he was helping me. He needed money. He knew we had no money, but he had a chance to sell the Chardin. I took it for him this morning. I had to. Everything I did, I did because I had to.”
She looked from me to her father. He averted his face from her.
“You didn’t have to smash Hugh’s skull,” I said. “Why did you do that?”
Her doll’s eyes rolled in her head, came back to me, glinting with a cold and deathly coquetry. “If I tell you, will you do one thing for me? One favor? Give me father’s gun for just a second?”
“And let you kill us all?”
“Only myself,” she said. “Just leave one shell in it.”
“Don’t give it to her,” the Admiral said. “She’s done enough to disgrace us.”
“I have no intention of giving it to her. And I don’t have to be told why she killed Hugh. While she was waiting in his studio last night, she found a sketch of his. It was an old sketch, but she didn’t know that. She’d never seen it before, for obvious reasons.”
“What kind of a sketch?”
“A portrait of a nude woman. She tacked it up on the easel and decorated it with a beard. When Hugh came home he saw what she’d done. He didn’t like to have his pictures spoiled, and he probably slapped her face.”
“He hit me with his fist,” Alice said. “I killed him in self-defense.”
“That may be the way you’ve rationalized it. Actually, you killed him out of jealousy.”
She laughed. It was a cruel sound, like vital tissue being ruptured. “Jealousy of her?”
“The same jealousy that made you ruin the sketch.” Her eyes widened, but they were blind, looking into herself. “Jealousy? I don’t know. I felt so lonely, all alone in the world. I had nobody to love me, since my mother died.”
“It isn’t true, Alice. You had me.” The Admiral’s tentative hand came out and paused again in the air, as though there were an invisible wall between them.
“I never had you. I hardly saw you. Then Sarah took you. I had no one, no one until Hugh. I thought at last that I had some one to love me, that I could count on–”
Her voice broke off. The Admiral looked everywhere but at his daughter. The room was like a cubicle in hell where lost souls suffered under the silent treatment. The silence was finally broken by the sound of a distant siren. It rose and expanded until its lamentation filled the night.
Alice was crying, with her face uncovered. Mary Western came forward and put her arm around her. “Don’t cry.” Her voice was warm. Her face had a grave beauty.
“You hate me, too.”
“No. I’m sorry for you, Alice. Sorrier than I am for Hugh.” The Admiral touched my arm. “Who was the woman in the sketch?” he said in a trembling voice.
I looked into his tired old face and decided that he had suffered enough. “I don’t know.”
But I could see the knowledge in his eyes.
The Suicide
I PICKED HER UP on the Daylight. Or maybe she picked me up. With some of the nicest girls, you never know.
She seemed to be very nice, and very young. She had a flippant nose and wide blue eyes, the kind that men like to call innocent. Her hair bubbled like boiling gold around her small blue hat. When she turned from the window to hear my deathless comments on the landscape and the weather, she wafted spring odors towards me.
She laughed in the right places, a little hectically. But in between, when the conversation lagged, I could see a certain somberness in her eyes, a pinched look around her mouth like the effects of an early frost. When I asked her to join me in the buffet car for a drink, she said:
“Oh, no. Thank you. I couldn’t possibly.”
“Why not?”
“I’m not quite twenty-one, for one thing. You wouldn’t want to contribute to the delinquency of a minor?”
“It sounds like a pleasant enterprise.”
She veiled her eyes and turned away. The green hills plunged backward past the train window like giant dolphins against the flat blue background of the sea. The afternoon sun was bright on her hair. I hoped I hadn’t offended her.
I hadn’t. After a while she leaned towards me and touched my arm with hesitant fingertips.
“Since you’re so kind, I’ll tell you what I would like.” She wrinkled her nose in an anxious way. “A sandwich? Would it cost so very much more than a drink?”
“A sandwich it is.”
On the way to the diner, she caught the eye of every man on the train who wasn’t asleep. Even some of the sleeping ones stirred, as if her passing had induced a dream. I censored my personal dream. She was too young for me, too innocent. I told myself that my interest was strictly paternal.
She asked me to order her a turkey sandwich, all white meat, and drummed on the tablecloth until it arrived. It disappeared in no time. She was ravenous.
“Have another,” I said.
She gave me a look which wasn’t exactly calculating, just questioning. “Do you really think I should?”
“Why not? You’re pretty hungry.”
“Yes, I am. But–” She blushed. “I hate to ask a stranger – you know?”
“No personal obligation. I like to see hungry people eat.”
“You’re awfully generous. And I am awfully hungry. Are you sure you can afford it?”
“Money is no object. I just collected a thousand-dollar fee in San Francisco. If you can use a full-course dinner, say so.”
“Oh, no, I couldn’t accept that. But I will confess that I could eat another sandwich.”
I signaled to the waiter. The second sandwich went the way of the first while I drank coffee. She ate the olives and slices of pickle, too.
“Feeling better now? You were looking a little peaked.”
“Much better, thank you. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I hadn’t eaten all day. And I’ve been on short rations for a week.”
I looked her over deliberately. Her dark blue suit was new, and expensively cut. Her bag was fine calfskin. Tiny diamonds winked in the white-gold case of her wristwatch.
“I know what you’re thinking,” she said. “I could have pawned something. Only I couldn’t bear to. I spent my last cent on my ticket – I waited till the very last minute, when I had just enough to pay my fare.”