“You won’t stay with us?”
Too late Akitada realized he had made an error. He did not know what to say and muttered something about work at the ministry.
Kosehira recognized this for prevarication. His face set, he demanded, “What happened at my house to send you away in such a rush and make you refuse to come back?”
Akitada just shook his head and muttered, “Nothing, Kosehira. Nothing at all?”
“This has something to do with Yukiko, right?”
“No, no.” Akitada was aware that he had flushed. “Kosehira,” he begged, “let it go. Nothing happened. I’m just in one of my moods.”
For a few moments, Kosehira did not speak. Then he said, “I was wrong to push my daughter at you. It was not respectful of either of you. Now I have made her desperately unhappy, and you refuse to accept my hospitality. I beg your pardon.”
Akitada gazed at him. He thought he must have misheard. “What?”
Kosehira wrung his hands in distress. “I’m sorry, Akitada. Believe me, I thought it would help you to have someone to love again. And Yukiko, well, she’s my favorite, though I’ll deny it if you mention it to anyone. I wanted her to have a happy marriage. Like Tamako’s.”
Akitada found his voice. “You wanted me to meet your daughter because you wished us to be married?”
“Yes. That’s why I arranged your stay at my house.”
“But Kosehira, I’m too old for her and certainly not a good prospect in terms of rank and influence.”
Kosehira waved a hand to disperse such objections like gnats. “Who cares? I know you and I know you would be kind to my child.”
Weak with the shock of this revelation, Akitada burst into laughter. “Oh, Kosehira,” he gasped. “With you for a father-in-law, no son-in-law would dare mistreat Yukiko.”
Kosehira did not smile. “You don’t understand. It doesn’t matter. I’ll try to look after her. The trouble is she’s been talking about becoming a nun. Yukiko a nun? Think about it.”
Akitada thought about it and stopped laughing. “I thought she planned to marry the prime minister’s son?”
“She doesn’t like him.”
An awkward silence fell, while thoughts chased each other in Akitada’s mind like agitated koi in Yukiko’s fishpond. “Kosehira,” he finally said, “I left because I’d fallen in love with your daughter.”
Kosehira’s jaw sagged for a moment. Then he jumped up, laughing out loud, and performed a little dance. Grasping Akitada by the hands, he pulled him up, embraced him, and then made him dance about with him. They were both laughing.
When heads appeared in the doorway, they stopped.
Kosehira waved his clerks away. “Never mind,” he called out..”Just some very good news.”
They left, and Kosehira looked as if he might start dancing again. Akitada, deeply embarrassed, though quite ridiculously happy, cleared his throat. They resumed their seats and looked at each other, smiling.
Akitada said, “I’m too old for her.”
Kosehira countered with, “She doesn’t think so.”
“You mean she would really agree?”
“Of course. You nearly broke her heart.”
They fell silent. Akitada sat, shaking his head, smiling, suddenly impatient to see her, to be certain she really wanted this.
Kosehira guessed his thoughts. “No time like the present. You’ll stay with her tonight?”
“Dear gods,” protested Akitada, “you cannot rush such a thing. I have not had any time to court her. She has not met my children.”
“Yes, but hurry up, will you?”
Akitada promised.
Kosehira next insisted on discussing his daughter’s dowry. Akitada was reminded that Tamako had brought him nothing but herself and an empty lot where her father’s house had stood. His ears were ringing by the time Kosehira was done. He said weakly, “It shall all be hers and her children’s.”
Kosehira rubbed his hands. “It’s all set then. I’ll have the papers drawn up tomorrow.”
Chapter Thirty-One
The Wild Geese
As soon as they reached Kosehira’s villa that evening, Akitada went into the garden, hoping to find Yukiko.
Kosehira had spent the ride home chattering gleefully about his daughter. It was clear he loved her dearly, and Akitada had the uncomfortable feeling that his friend would remain alert to her welfare even after she had become his wife and lived in the Sugawara home.
Custom prescribed that a son-in-law live in his new wife’s home and become a part of her family. It was not a notion Akitada found appealing. There would be no privacy for the couple, and he treasured his privacy. In his first marriage, the possibility had not arisen because Tamako had become both fatherless and homeless on the same day. In this case, it was surely understood that Yukiko would come to him, but clearly there would be strings attached.
More worrisome was that all of these plans had been presented to him so quickly and completely. Apparently, Kosehira had expected Akitada and Yukiko to step unprotestingly into their ascribed roles. And so he now wanted to see her to assure himself that she would come to him willingly and without reservations. He was no longer at all sure of this.
Alas, the garden was empty, and after waiting quite a long time, wandering back and forth between the promontory and the koi pond, Akitada returned to his room to change. There would be another family dinner tonight in celebration of the engagement, and he dreaded it.
It was young Arimitsu, the youngest of Kosehira’s sons, who met him on his way to the main house. He came running, all smiles, and stopped before Akitada with the words, “You are to be my brother-in-law. Father said so. I’m very glad!”
Greatly moved by this artless welcome, Akitada laughed and swung him up into his arms to hug him, saying, “I’m very glad, too, Arimitsu. Thank you.”
They walked hand-in-hand to the main house, Arimitsu quiet now and proud to be leading the guest of honor. When they entered the reception room, chosen for this meal in honor of the occasion, Akitada’s heart misgave him again. It was all happening too fast. He had not had time to think. What would Kosehira’s wives think of this odd match?
He glanced around nervously, but saw only smiling faces. Yukiko was absent, and that gave him a new worry.
They seated him between Kosehira and his first lady, Yukiko’s mother. This was perhaps traditional. The presence of all the children though, was surely not. He was grateful for it, especially when Arimitsu gave him a broad grin. The other youngsters were more reserved, but seemed quietly pleased.
When all eyes turned toward the door, he saw Yukiko. She wore a gorgeous robe of shimmering gauze over pale green silk with touches of red and pink peeking forth at her full sleeves and at the hem of her skirts. She looked beautiful and remote. Not once did she lift her head to look at Akitada as she went to her place on her father’s other side where Akitada would be unable to catch her eye throughout the meal.
He wished himself elsewhere. Back at home in his study, far away from people and obligations, from having to make conversation when his heart misgave him. Dear gods, how was he to get through this meal?
And through the other formalities yet to come?
Somehow they consumed the first courses, served by two pretty maids, while talking about the weather.
“Today, I saw geese flying north again,” said Arikuni, Kosehira’s second son. “Spring is almost over. What a pity. All those fairs are so much fun. Will you be here for the Great Shrine Festival, Cousin Akitada?”
“Yes. That is, if I can get the time off. My superior indicated that he has a good deal of work waiting for me.” That had sounded stilted and awkward, and he added, “Yasuko and Yoshi have been begging to come, and I did promise them.”