“So… I should leave? But I’ve never left Gliverstoll before.”
“You shall stay here tonight, and tomorrow we will send you to school like any normal boy. During the day, Storm and I will make sure that your school, neighborhood, and house are safe to return to — and double-check that the witches didn’t lay out any traps for you or your mother. If there’s a problem, one of us will find you at school. Otherwise, scurry home, quick as a lick, and then flee Gliverstoll with your mother. We’ll distract the Fairfoul Witch and the entire Council while you make your escape. You’ll need our help — otherwise, they’ll know and drag you back in an instant.”
“Why can’t we do this now?” Rupert said impatiently.
“The Fairfoul Witch is out and about during these hours. If we head to your house, the Fairfoul Witch will learn of our betrayal. But the Fairfoul Witch sleeps during your school hours and wakes up at three-quarters to the witching hour.”
“What’s that?” Rupert said.
Sandy stroked her chin. “That’s a human gibbon o’clock.”
“Gibbon?”
“Erm… nine plus eight? What do you call that?
“Seventeen?”
“Yes!” Sandy said. “Seventeen o’clock.”
“But what is that?” Rupert said, starting to lose his patience.
“Twenty-four hours in a day, seventeen hours past none o’clock.”
Rupert scratched his head. “I don’t understand witch math,” he said.
“No matter,” Nebby said. “After school, run right home. Then grab your mother and flee as fast as you can.”
“If you don’t cause any commotion, you’ll be leopards of miles away before the Fairfoul Witch even brushes her teeth,” Sandy said.
“But I can’t go to school! Mrs. Frabbleknacker is mad beyond mad at me!”
Sandy gasped. “She is?”
“It’s your fault, you know!”
“Oh.”
Nebby shook her head. “I’m sorry, Rupert, but you must. If you deviate from what other kids are doing, you’ll stick out to the other witches who are on the lookout for you. The only way to escape is to go to school and not to act suspiciously.”
“But what do I do about Mrs. Frabbleknacker?”
“Mrs. Frickleknuckers is nothing compared to the Fairfoul Witch, Rupert,” Sandy said. “You can face her.”
“You must,” Nebby said. “And then you must run away forever, Rupert,” Nebby said. “You and your mother will only be safe if you never come back.”
Rupert frowned. He didn’t want to think it. But he couldn’t avoid the thought. “And what if…” Rupert said, letting the horrible thought come to his lips. “What if we don’t escape the witches? What then?”
Storm ran a finger across her throat, miming the slit of a knife. She frowned and looked at him sadly, like he was already a goner.
The Last Class
IN THE MORNING, NEBBY, STORM, AND SANDY walked Rupert to the nearest bus stop. Sandy rubbed her eyes, trying to contain her tears. Storm did not have the same restraint — she sobbed and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her robes. Rupert was flattered that Storm felt so strongly about him — until she whispered, “That morning sun is so lovely!”
Rupert looked up at Nebby, who reached out a hand to help Rupert up.
“You must leave town — as quickly and quietly as you can,” Nebby reminded him. “You and your mother should be safe once you get far enough away.”
“And don’t forget to mind your Z’s and two’s,” Storm said.
“And don’t worry about Mrs. Frabblecrackers,” Sandy said. “The sand potion should still be in your system from yesterday, at least for a little while. I don’t think she’ll give you any trouble.”
“Can I use the leftover potion in my water bottle?” Rupert asked.
Sandy shook her head. “That should be stale. We could have made a new one, but…” Sandy whimpered. And that whimper turned into a snivel. And that snivel turned into a weep. And that weep turned into a cry. And that cry turned into a wail. And that wail turned into a sob. And that sob turned into a blubber.
“I’m sorry!” Sandy said, wiping her face on her arm. “I know I’m only supposed to cry when I’m happy! But you were the best friend I ever had!”
Watching her, Rupert was gutted. “Me too,” he said miserably. He tried to memorize her round face, her freckles, her blond hair tucked in a high ponytail, her big teeth — he couldn’t believe that this was the last time he would ever see Sandy.
“Do well on your Bar Exam,” Rupert said. “You only have three days left, so you better practice a lot.”
“I will,” Sandy sniffled.
Rupert nodded. “You’ll be the best Sand Witch anyone has ever seen.”
They hugged, and the emptiness grew inside his chest.
The bus came, and Rupert went to the very last row so he could wave to Sandy as the bus drove him to the worst place in the world. At first Sandy waved back, but then they grew farther and farther apart, until she was just a speck in his field of vision — and then she was gone altogether.
Rupert turned around, crossed his arms, and scowled. Just when he found a friend that Mrs. Frabbleknacker couldn’t take away, he still couldn’t be friends with her, all because of another horrible adult — the Fairfoul Witch. The more he thought about it, the more steamed he became. Who was Mrs. Frabbleknacker to stop him from talking to his friends? And who was the Fairfoul Witch to make him leave town?
When the school bus finally arrived, Rupert shuffled into the hallway, walked into his classroom, and took his seat. A few jaws dropped when he walked in, and poor brave Bruno leaned over and whispered, “We thought you were a goner.”
Rupert shrugged. He hurt in the bottom of his chest, in the pit of his stomach. He wanted to cry.
But he put on a brave smile and said to Bruno, “Nope, I’m just fine.”
“What did Mrs. Frabbleknacker do?” Allison asked. “Did she pull your hair?”
“Did she stomp on your toes?” said Kaleigh.
“Did she poke you in the side with a spoon?” said Hal.
“Did she sock you in the stomach?” squeaked Manny, from his little glass jar on the windowsill.
“She didn’t do anything,” he said. And he sat down in his seat, very aware that the rest of the class was staring at him with awe.
Not a moment later, the door burst open, and Mrs. Frabbleknacker blew in. She sniffed and looked around the room very carefully. Her eyes stopped when she reached Rupert’s desk, but Rupert noticed that she squinted slightly as she stared at him, as if he was blurry and she couldn’t quite see him.
“Children,” she said, as though she was saying something truly awful like Ingrown Toenail or Hairy Ice Cream. “Today is for mathematics.”
Everyone groaned.
“Hush!” Mrs. Frabbleknacker said, crinkling her criggly nose. “Now I know you may be disappointed. I know you thought that because we hadn’t done mathematics thus far, we weren’t going to do it ever. But you were wrong. You’re always wrong. If you are always wrong and never right, then what percentage are you wrong?”
“One hundred percent,” the class droned.
“WRONG!” Mrs. Frabbleknacker jumped up. “You are wrong hyrax percent!”
Rupert scratched his head and wrote hyrax = 100 in his notebook.
Mrs. Frabbleknacker walked to the front of the classroom, her heels clicking. She stopped when she got to the jar that trapped Manny. She stared at him. “If I say that Manny is two plus three inches tall, then how tall is he?” Mrs. Frabbleknacker whipped around, her eyes bulging. “Allison!”