Finally, his mother calmed down enough to sputter, “You are so grounded. Where in the world have you been?” She looked up, but her gaze stopped on Nebby and Storm. “I–I know you. You’re a part of the Wi—” She caught herself and looked at Rupert.
“It’s okay, Mom. I know they’re part of the Witches Council. And I know they forced you to work for them.”
“I’m the Nebulous Witch.” Nebby held out her hand, and his mother tentatively shook it. “Ah, now that we’re face-to-face, I do think I recognize you, but we’ve never actually met.”
After a moment’s hesitation, Rupert’s mother began to speak. “I’ve only ever talked to the Fairfoul Witch and the Midnight Witch,” she said, her voice sounding a little timid. “They forbid me from speaking to anyone. And I’ve only stepped foot in the lair during off-hours.”
“That explains it, then,” Nebby said warmly. “I’m sorry for anything you went through because of them. We aren’t all quite so difficult, are we Storm?”
Storm walked over and pinched his mom’s cheeks. “Hello, I’m Storm. Lovely, lovely to meet you!”
“Rupert?” his mom said, calling for help.
Rupert pried Storm off his mother’s face. And then he told his mother everything, starting at the very beginning. He told her all about Mrs. Frabbleknacker’s trip to the dump, all about her horrible lessons, all about the help he had been giving Sandy, all about Mrs. Frabbleknacker’s true identity as the Fairfoul Witch, and about the great rabbit fiasco.
“Back up!” his mother interrupted. “Your teacher was the Fairfoul Witch?”
Sandy nodded vigorously, and Storm shrugged.
“But — but why?”
Nebby gently rested her hand on his mother’s shoulder. “After listening to the Fairfoul Witch’s testimony, the Council realizes now that we severely underestimated how much she loved to practice her punishments. Last summer, she saw that a post for a fifth-grade teacher was available, and she took the job. Because, truly, where better to practice cruel magic than with a class of kids? After all, who would believe them?”
Rupert glared at his mother, and she guiltily slouched.
Nebby kept talking. “Can you believe she had been lying to her own Witches Council? She sneaked out in the morning when we all thought she was sleeping, and none of us ever wanted to disturb her sleep because she is a renowned grouch when she wakes up. I can’t believe she pulled the wool over my eyes for so long.”
“Don’t blame yourself, Nebby,” Sandy said brightly. “She fooled us all. You know, Rupert always smelled very funny when he came home from school. I should have recognized her scent way earlier.”
Rupert’s mother put a hand on his shoulder. “You tried to tell me all about Mrs. Frabbleknacker, and I wouldn’t listen.”
“That’s okay, Mom,” Rupert said. “Allison’s parents didn’t believe her either, and she came home with mustache and beard. And Manny’s parents didn’t even notice he was gone!”
“Gone?”
Rupert nodded. “Mrs. Frabbleknacker turned him into our class pet.”
His mother steadied herself by gripping the basement table.
Nebby pursed her lips. “We have reason to believe that the Fairfoul Witch was using potions on local parents to make them forget about their children.”
“Well, that’s horrible!” said Rupert’s mother. “That witch is the most horrible witch I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet.”
Rupert shuffled his feet. Then he took a deep breath and asked the question that had been gnawing at him for a while. “Mom, why did you steal that forbidden potion? You must have known you’d be punished.”
“Yes, that was certainly a risk.”
“Why did you do it, then?”
She pulled him into a tight hug. “Because I wanted you in my life, Rupert. You’re more important to me than anything else in the world.”
Rupert swallowed a choked-up feeling in his throat, and he buried his face into her middle.
His mother brushed his hair with her hand. “When I look at you, I know I made the right choice. You’re worth it, Rupert. You are so worth every bit of my debt, and I’ll be glad to pay it off for as long as I live.”
“You won’t have to,” Rupert said, and he pulled the signed contract from his pocket. “The Witches Council promised to leave us alone.”
His mother tore the contract from him, her eyes widening as she read. “How did you—”
“It was Sandy,” Rupert said. “And Nebby and Storm, too — they helped.”
His mother read over the contract again and wiped the silent tears off her cheeks. When she finally spoke again, her voice was choked, but she cracked a smile wider than Rupert had seen on her in years.
“You were right, Rupert,” his mother said. “You were right all along.”
“About the witches?”
“No, about Sandy. She’s a good friend.”
“The best,” Rupert agreed.
Sandy smiled and blushed a shade so red she almost looked purple.
The Bar Exam
WHEN RUPERT WALKED INTO SCHOOL ON FRIDAY, the whole class sat silently. News that Mrs. Frabbleknacker decided to step down from her post before the school year was over spread across the town like an outbreak of lice. Only Rupert knew the truth — that Mrs. Frabbleknacker, at the behest of the Witches Council, had decided to permanently retire from teaching.
Rupert took his seat next to Kyle and Allison. “Good morning,” he said to no one in particular. “How’s it going?”
“Shhhh!” Allison hissed.
“Are you crazy?” Kyle said.
“Don’t talk until we see who our teacher is,” Hal said. “What if she’s worse than Mrs. Frabbleknacker?”
Rupert smiled. “She won’t be,” he said.
At that moment, a man burst into the room and wrote his name underneath the spot in the chalkboard where Mrs. Frabbleknacker had carved LIFE IS FAIR, AND FAIR IS FOUL.
“Good morning, class,” he said.
Nobody spoke. Everyone stared at him with big doe eyes.
“Oh, well,” the man said, rubbing his hands in his hair. “I’m Mr. Splinkle. I, erm… wrote my name on the board here as you can see. Feel free to copy it down.”
Everyone scribbled his name as fast as possible.
“Er, well, today we’re going to work on science.”
Everybody cringed.
“Hmmm?” Mr. Splinkle said. “Well, I thought we’d talk about different ecosystems. Can anybody name one?”
Poor, brave Bruno raised his hand. “The ocean?” he said.
“Almost,” Mr. Splinkle said. The class cowered, waiting for him to institute a punishment on poor, brave Bruno. But instead, Mr. Splinkle continued. “You’re right in concept, but technically it’s called the Marine Ecosystem.”
The whole class exhaled. No punishment, not even for getting a question wrong.
Mr. Splinkle taught the most boring lesson that Rupert had ever endured. Then he taught an even more boring grammar lesson about gerunds. Then he taught, if possible, an even more boring-beyond- boring math lesson about multiplying fractions.
It was the most wonderful school day Rupert had had in a very long time.
After class, he waited outside the door for Kaleigh, Allison, Kyle, Manny, Hal, Bruno, and the rest of his classmates, but Mr. Splinkle came out first.