The policeman said: “Mr. Smith, I told your wife that I wasn’t going to give this hellion many more chances. He was caught stealing fruit. Now you punish him good, and don’t let me catch him again or it means Juvenile Court.”
“Why wait for the next time?” I asked.
The policeman said, “Huh?” and left his mouth open.
“Why wait for the next time? The child has disobeyed one of the rules of society, and thus the matter should be handled by one of the duly constituted organizations. Moreover, he was caught, and should pay the penalty of being caught. I see no reason for leniency, particularly since leniency will only serve to encourage future trespasses.”
The policeman opened his notebook and scribbled a note. “Okay, Mister. He’s your kid. Have him at Juvenile Court at nine o’clock on Saturday morning.” He left.
They all looked at me, Marg with shock and loathing, Gerald with hurt pride, James with fear and surprise. All of their emotions were childish. I stared back at them and permitted myself a small smile.
Marg said: “I am leaving this house, leaving this instant — as soon as I pack. And I’m taking Gerald and Jimmy and Georgie with me. You’re a... a monster! I hate you! I hate you!” She fled from the room.
Gerald took a step toward me, his t fists clenched. He said: “This is certainly a fine way to treat my sister after all the years she’s been cooking and scrubbing and washing.”
I said: “It is odd to hear you speak of physical effort when you avoid it so assiduously. I see that you are giving way to anger. That is the emotion of a savage. I am, for the first time in my life, doing and saying what is absolutely logical and necessary. And your mind is too small for you to see it. You would find a release in striking me — a savage release. If you strike me, I will be forced to defend myself. I outweigh you and I am quicker. You may hit me if you wish.”
He too left the room. James looked up at me and said: “Pop, you’re going to let them send me to jail!”
“If your actions have been such as to warrant a sentence, they will undoubtedly send you to jail.” I didn’t tell him that it was much more probable that he would be reprimanded and given a suspended sentence — discharged in my custody.
He walked slowly toward the door, his hands crammed deeply into his pockets, scuffing at the rug. When they were all gone, I looked around the room and it struck me that the decorative aspects of the room were very foolish. Why have pictures when you can remember clearly everything you have ever seen? Why have colors in the rugs and the furniture? Rugs are to walk on and chairs are to sit on. Colors have no part in the scheme. And the silly colored paper on the wall. I remembered instantly what I had paid for it. A purposeless use of money. To what end? It seemed that once I had liked it... I couldn’t remember why. I heard, with no interest, the sound of Marg weeping as she packed. I sensed that she expected me to go in to her and apologize. For what?
If the exercise of intelligence drove her out of the house, who was the loser? Certainly not I. It was essential that I be housed and clothed and fed. That I could do without her assistance, and possibly more adequately than with her assistance. It was immaterial to me whether she left or stayed. I knew that with my newfound powers I could secure an adequate living. She had nothing to offer that was necessary to me. There was a word they used. What was it? Love. A complete rationalization. The expression of the emotional loneliness of the human spirit, anxious to identify itself with another spirit also lonely. A foolishness! Without emotions there can be no loneliness, and thus no spiritual need for identification with another. Let her go. Let them all go. My duty is to care for and protect my body, as it is a vehicle for my mind. With my mind I can acquire the things of this world necessary to protect the body. All else is a supreme ridiculousness.
After they had gone, I went to a restaurant. I found that when I looked at the menu, I could remember the exact vitamin, calorie and protein content of each dish. I made a rapid calculation of the meals I had consumed earlier in the day, added up the ingredients consumed, and estimated that one slice of bread, a glass of milk and an apple would round out the necessary sustenance for the day. I ordered those items.
When I left, the cashier stood with his back turned. I walked out without paying. Surely it is the height of emotional nonsense to think of the matter as an ethical problem. There is no such thing as honesty and dishonesty to the pure intelligence. It is all a matter of reasoning. Pay only when the fact of not paying will work a greater inconvenience.
After I ate, I went to the movies — a stupid film about gangsters. One of them was interesting up to the point when he permitted fear to betray him and he was captured by the police. He used his intelligence to acquire great wealth right up to the point where he foolishly allowed his fear to cloud his judgment. As I drove back to my house, I thought of my future. It was obviously senseless to go back and permit them to remove from me the one factor which differentiated me from the stupid mass of humanity. Without emotions, without pity, or anger, or fear, or hate, and with a perfect memory, it was obvious that there were several promising fields. Murder, for one. To remove the lives of those stupid, yammering masses of emotion! To do it cleverly, with perfect coldness! My memory for detail would prevent my making mistakes. I would be unsuspected! Such an occupation would give me leisure time for thought — pure thought — and would provide the highest reward for the minimum amount of effort.
Before I went to sleep, without removing the apparatus, I decided that I would not go back to the offices — unless I found it politic to kill Mr. Miller.
I woke in the morning with a foul taste in my mouth and a sharp memory of nightmares. I reached out to awaken Marg and tell her about the nightmares, but she wasn’t there. I sat up in bed. Something brushed against my arm. I looked down. It was the flesh-colored clamp that should have been fastened behind my right ear. The other one was still attached behind my left ear.
Nightmares? Not for a minute. I realized with horror that it had all been true. I sat in bed and chewed on my fingers as I remembered the things I had done, the things I had said. With a shock, I remembered that I didn’t even own the house I had slept in. I clawed the gadget from behind my left ear and jumped out of bed to stand trembling in the middle of the room, staring at it. The wires were like vicious snakes. One had been pulled off in my sleep. I shuddered to think of what might have happened if they had been more securely fixed in place.
I dressed, dropped the thing in a paper bag and drove down to the offices. I sat trembling in the waiting-room until Mr. Miller arrived. He was surprised to see me. He said: “You got the thing off already? What’s the matter? You look terrible!”
“Mr. Miller, I feel terrible. This gadget, this Pendans Box, it’s Pandora’s Box, that’s what it is! It’s full of the most horrible—” I couldn’t go on. I could only gulp.
He said: “Sit tight, Bill, and I’ll call you in as soon as Professor Pendaniels arrives. He’s due in a few minutes.”
It was nine-fifteen when he called me in. He sat behind his huge conference table that filled a mammoth alcove of his office. I sat on his right and Pendaniels on his left. The brown paper bag with the devilish contrivance in it rested on the dark polished table. Mr. Miller motioned to me to go ahead.