Meredith sighed. How she wished she could tell Kelsey everything. At least her friend might be able to give her some hope or encouragement. But Kelsey would never believe everything that had happened in the past two months. "Not exactly."
"But you have his phone number. You said you were going to call him."
"But he might not be there," Meredith said. "In fact, that's why I came back. If things don't work out, I'm moving back here right away. I talked to Dr. Moore today and told him I wanted to teach that seminar in colonial American history for next semester."
"So rather than face your problems head-on, you're going to retreat into your work. If I were you, I'd go after the bum. And if you don't, I will."
"I-I can't. And neither can you."
Kelsey shook her head in disbelief. "Just where did this Griffin go that you can't find him?"
Meredith laughed softly. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."
"Try me," Kelsey challenged. "I've heard them all, from 'The dog ate my homework' to 'I was abducted by aliens the night before my final exam.' Whatever you say, I'll promise to believe you."
Meredith drew a deep breath. Maybe if Kelsey knew the truth, she might be able to help. After all, she was a scientist. She had to have an open mind about the unknown. "Remember when I asked you about traveling in time?"
"Yes," Kelsey replied.
"Well… that's it." The words rushed out of her along with a tightly held breath.
Kelsey scowled. "What's it?"
"Time travel."
"What about time travel?" Kelsey asked.
Meredith sighed inwardly. How was she supposed to explain without sounding like a lunatic? Kelsey could be very protective when her friends were troubled. The last thing Meredith needed right now was Kelsey fussing and hovering over her. "You see, I… well, he… I'm not going to write a novel," she said, the last sentence tumbling out of her mouth unbidden. "After all, everyone knows that time travel just isn't possible."
"Of course it's not possible. At least not now," Kelsey confirmed. "But I told you that in September."
"And I listened," Meredith replied, swiftly altering her course, knowing that now was not the time to tell Kelsey. "I've decided to finish my Blackbeard book. And I'm going to take on a few more classes next semester, so when I have the baby I can afford to take some time off."
"Are you sure you're ready to raise a child alone? It's hard enough with two people."
"I love Griffin," Meredith said. "And I know he loves me. And even if we can't be together, I'll have a part of him with me because I'll have his child."
"Did he tell you that he loves you?"
Meredith shook her head. "I know he does. He's just not very good at expressing his feelings. He loves me, Kelsey."
"Then why did he leave?" Kelsey demanded.
Meredith closed her eyes and tipped her head back, letting the breeze blow against her flushed face. "He had no choice." She opened her eyes and gave Kelsey a sideways glance. "Can you at least be a little bit happy for me? What happened between Griffin and me was wonderful. And even if I never see him again, I'll never, ever regret it."
"How can I be happy when your life is in chaos? I'm worried about you, Meredith. You've always kept such tight control over your emotions. You've led such an orderly life. Now you're a wreck. Look at you. You look like you haven't eaten in days."
Meredith pushed to her feet and hoisted her bag up on her shoulder. "I haven't. So why don't you buy me lunch at that pretty little tearoom on Prince George Street. Then, I've got a long drive back to Ocracoke. I borrowed a car from Tank Muldoon and he needs it back by morning."
"Why don't you forget about going back?" Kelsey asked. "Stay here."
"I can't. All my research is still at the cottage. And I've paid the rent through the end of December. But if you're so worried, you can come down and pick me up before Christmas."
"I should have never agreed to take you down there in the first place. I feel like this is partially my fault. I should have talked you into staying in Williamsburg to Work on that damn pirate book."
Meredith looped her arm in Kelsey's and grinned. "You know I never listen to you, Kels."
"I know," Kelsey said with a pout.
"But you're still my very best friend in the world. You always will be." Meredith tugged on Kelsey's arm and they started off in the direction of College Yard. As they walked through the Sunken Garden, Meredith looked at every beautiful building, every ancient tree and every perfect flower. This was her home and she felt safe here. If Griffin didn't come back, she would find a way to be happy here again.
Strange how quickly life changed. For the longest time, she couldn't imagine being content anyplace but William and Mary. Her career had been her whole life. Though she had worried over publication and tenure and class assignments and campus politics, she'd reveled in her life and her research.
The whole time, she'd never realized there was something-or someone-missing from her life. And now, in such a very short time, Griffin had carved out a place for himself in her heart and soul, a place she never knew existed. She could imagine being happy anywhere, as long as she was with him. And if not with him, then with their child.
When they reached the center of College Yard, Meredith stopped and turned to take a long look at the Wren Building. It stood sentinel over the campus, a picture of symmetrical elegance made of soft red brick. Its multipaned windows sparkled in the sun and the weathervane perched on the cupola clock tower swung with the vagaries of the autumn breeze. "It's very old, isn't it," she murmured, shading her eyes. "Hard to believe it's lasted three hundred years."
"I've never seen anyone so attached to a bunch of creaky old buildings as you are," Kelsey teased.
"I wonder how they looked when they were brand new," Meredith said.
Griffin would know. She scolded herself inwardly. How many times did she think of him everyday? I wonder what Griffin would think of this, I wonder what Griffin would say about that? If he didn't come back, she would have to learn to put him out of her mind. She would focus all her attention on their child. And more important, she would choose to believe he was still alive and happy-somewhere.
But until she tried to summon him tomorrow night, she had to believe that he would return-to her and to their child.
9
Outside the gray-shingled cottage, an unrelenting wind whipped through the branches of the live oaks, sending up an eerie moan. Waves, roiling and ominously black, crashed against the narrow beach. In the sky above, the moon shone as it had the night he'd gone, the bright white light dimmed every few minutes by invisible clouds scudding across the night sky.
Meredith let the lace curtain drop from her stiff fingers and glanced at the clock next to the bed. Her heart skipped a beat. Eleven fifty-five. It was almost time. She closed her eyes and said a silent prayer, clutching the book to her chest.
"Please, please, let this work," she whispered, a desperate edge to her voice. "Send him back to me, safe and sound."
He wasn't dead. She'd spent the last month proving that to herself, searching every original source she could find-letters, journals, books-for any mention of his name. The day she found the name of the seaman mistaken for a pirate, she cried, for it wasn't Griffin Rourke.
Every night, from the night that he'd left, she'd stood on the beach and waited, hoping that by some miracle she would find him there. Some evenings, she would let the tears fall unchecked, allowing herself to fall prey to her emotions. On other nights, she would refuse to give in, knowing in her heart that they would be together soon. Sometimes, she'd even talk to him, as if he were right be-side her, telling him all about the baby and the wonderful future they'd have together.
With trembling fingers, she lit the lantern. Ben Gunn was already in his place in the closet, squawking in protest. She'd even put on the same clothes she'd worn the night Griffin arrived, just for luck. Meredith searched her mind for anything she'd missed. For all she knew, she might have only one chance to bring him back and she wanted to make that chance count.