“No. They could not make me into what they desired. They failed. I feel… contempt? I do not care about them. They are as nothing, even as other shadows become something.” Alain shrugged. “That is what I tell myself. Mage Asha suffered worse than I did. I used to wonder at how strong in wisdom she was. But she rarely talks of those times.”
“That’s easy for me to understand. You know, I worried that you could tell about me. That being a Mage could let you see something.” Bev shut her eyes tightly. “I worry that everyone can look at me and tell, but Mages mostly.”
“I saw nothing except pain,” Alain said. “No Mage could see more than that, and no Mage would guess the cause.”
“Mages lie all the time,” Bev said. “Why do I believe you?”
“Mari would not like it if I caused you more hurt, and I would not like it if I caused you more hurt.”
“Um… thanks. Don’t tell Mari any of this, all right? Except, tell her I’m all right when it comes to doing things. I won’t lose it, I won’t go crazy, I won’t let her down. She can count on that.” Bev paused. “So can you. Thanks, Mage Alain. Just for listening. I had to tell somebody.”
Alain felt a helpless sensation. “I can do nothing, though.”
“You listened. You didn’t judge. You won’t tell others. That’s more than I could ask of anyone else. Thanks.” Bev got up, nodded at him, then walked off slowly.
Alain got up as well, opened the door to the cabin very quietly, and walked inside.
Mari was still deeply asleep, snoring lightly. He sat down on the other bunk, watching her, remembering that she had asked whether she snored while they waited to enter Marandur. They had survived Marandur. Perhaps—
And in that moment, his foresight came upon him again.
Overlaid on his sight of Mari was a vision of her. In the vision, Mari was also lying down, but on a surface of dressed stone blocks, the sort that made up stout outdoor structures. Her face and mouth were slack, not with tiredness, but with the shadow of death upon them, a shadow hovering very near, and something red and wet stained her dark Mechanics jacket.
As Alain stared, horrified, the vision faded. Mari was sleeping, her expression untroubled for the moment.
But he could not forget what he had seen.
And he had not been in that vision. If he had been, it would have meant the vision was of something that might happen. But he had seen Mari only.
Which meant this was something that would happen.
Chapter Six
“Mari was not dead?” Mage Asha spoke softly, just as Alain had spoken to her. She was upset enough to betray the emotion and so both of them were at a rail, facing out to sea.
“She was dying,” Alain managed to choke out.
“But not dead.”
“No.”
“Then she is fated to be badly hurt, but you did not see her dead.” Asha locked eyes with him. “That means even if this comes to pass, you can make a difference.”
“What difference is possible?” Alain asked. “You know as well as I that no Mage can directly affect a shadow. None of our spells can change a shadow in any way, for good or ill. Healing is impossible.”
“Then find a way, Mage Alain! You were not in the vision. That must matter.”
“How?”
“Perhaps if you are there, it will change things. If you are beside her, what you saw will not be.”
Alain stopped to think, breathing deeply. “Mage Asha, that offers hope. But how can I learn a wisdom that has evaded all Mages before this?”
“That is something you must discover,” Asha said. “How did Mari look? Was she older?”
“I could not tell,” Alain said.
“It may have been something that will not happen for years.”
“Not too many years,” Alain said. “Mari looked as I know her.”
“Listen,” Asha said with an intensity that Alain had never heard from her. “If it is known that Mari is to be so badly injured, it will harm what she seeks to do. Mari will be terrified to act, and those who would follow her will hold back for fear she will fail. You must not speak of this to anyone else.”
“I must tell Mari—”
“To what purpose?” Asha demanded. “Mage Alain, she is already haunted by fears. Will you now wave a bloody vision before her?”
“She deserves to know,” Alain said.
“And if such knowing causes her to fail? If such knowing causes Mari to hold back at a moment when she must leap forward? If such knowing causes the Storm to triumph and all to be lost because her fears of failure make the failure come to pass?”
Alain stared out at the sea, where countless whitecaps appeared and disappeared in endless array. “I do not know.”
“Ask yourself this,” Asha said. “If it were Mari who had this vision of you, lying with death on your brow, would you want her to tell you?”
He had to think a long time about that, his thoughts circling around and avoiding the answer. “No,” Alain finally admitted.
“What would Mari do?”
“She would work to… to change things. To fix things so that I would not die, regardless of what the vision shows. That is what she does.”
“Then you do the same,” Asha insisted. “Mage Alain, you are here for a reason, and that reason is not to bear helpless witness to the death of Mari. You are here to ensure that she succeeds in her task, and that she lives through every peril that task places in her path! I do not have foresight, but still I know this!”
Alain shook his head. “All is illusion. I cannot change so much.”
“All cast shadows on the illusion, and such as Mari are fated to cast shadows that change the illusion itself,” Asha said. “Your shadow is intertwined with that of Mari. Your fates are joined, just as your shadows are joined.”
“I feel you are right,” Alain said. “But it will be very hard not to tell Mari.”
“And it would be easy to tell her,” Asha said. “Easy to drop the burden of this foresight upon her even though she could do nothing with the knowledge but let it break her resolve. Should you do what is easy for you, or what is hard?”
“Hard,” Alain said. “Mari would understand.” He hoped that was so. “Your advice is good, Asha. Thank you. I did not know where else to turn.”
“You are welcome,” Asha said with the precision of someone who had just relearned the phrase. “Alain, you would have been my friend had either of us remembered what a friend was. Mari reached out to me when I could see only a shadow before me, and she showed me that I could regain so much I had lost. You and I are friends now because of Mari, and there is a chance that I will become more than a friend with Mechanic Dav because of Mari. I would not advise you in ways that I thought would hurt her, and if the worst comes to pass my grief will be second only to yours. But we will work to ensure the worst does not happen. Mari cannot bear every burden of being the daughter. This part of it must be ours.”
He was sitting on the bunk in the cabin, watching her again, the setting sun low enough in the sky to slant through the windows looking out over the stern, when Mari finally woke up. She yawned hugely, then looked over at him. “Good morning. Is it morning?”
“Almost evening,” Alain said.
“You look worried. Is anything wrong?”
“I am worried about you,” Alain said, feeling bad speaking a half-truth to someone he never wanted to lie to.
“About me?” Mari sat up, wincing at the effort. “I think I pulled several muscles getting you back to this ship. I’ll remind you that I wasn’t the one who got kidnapped by Dark Mages. Where are we? And is there anything to eat?”
Alain produced a platter of meat, cheese, and bread. “The cook prepared this for you. Do you want wine or water?”