“And what would that accomplish?”
“Maybe there is a way. If we gave up the kingdom and ran away together, the gods would have no reason to torment Baba.”
“You mean we’d become rogues?”
“Yes, if that’s the price of our love.” He reached out with a trembling paw and ran it down her chest and belly. “You are my kingdom, my treasure, my every need. I want you. I’ve waited for so long to crouch over your beautiful body and feel you shudder next to me! The border is right over there! Just beyond those trees! We could make love tonight!”
“And throw away everything we’ve worked for?? Territory? Safety?”
“Long, lonely nights! Empty days!”
“Our family?”
“Our separation!”
“Just like that??”
“Just like that, and never look back! Yes!” He rested his forearms on her chest, his throbbing heart pressed against hers. His lips brushed against her own as he spoke in a passionate whisper. “I’m on fire! I want you! I want both your body and your Ka. I want to fill myself with you. I can feel you tremble. You want me too--admit it!”
“Yes, I admit it!” she cried, more like a cry of remorse than passion. She wrapped her paws about him and rocked him gently back and forth. “Do you think the gods would accept it? Would they be content to let us steal a little happiness? Do you really think they would?”
“Don’t you?”
“Well I...if only we could....” She burst into tears and shoved him away with her paws. “We can’t! We can’t take the chance!”
“He sighed and kissed her again, this time gently. “Is that what you really want?”
She sobbed, “Does it matter what I really want? What I can’t have, I must learn to live without!” She touched him with her tongue. “Baba’s a lion with a wife and cubs that love him! I’d never gamble with his future, and neither would you. Not when you have control of your passions. Not when you’ve thought about what he means to us--both of us.”
He slid off her chest and rolled on his back, taking in a deep breath and letting it out in a sigh. “Yes, I love him too. I owe him my kingdom and my life. I have let my feelings run away with my common sense, old girl.”
“Then you understand.”
“I understand.” He looked at her intently. “Perhaps for the last time in this world, let me say that I love you with my life, my heart, my very soul. Never forget that, my blessed Nisei!”
“Lover, in my dreams tonight I will feel your breath on my cheek!” She wiped her eyes and sniffed. “I will tell our son that we were bound too tightly to our past to build a new love. That’s not really a lie when you come to think about it.”
“You can’t build a new love till you lose the old one.” He reached over and very gently kissed the tip of her muzzle. “God bless you, Kako.”
She struggled to her feet, looking back with a silver tear catching the moonlight on her cheek. “God bless you too.” And then she turned and stalked away into the shadows.
When she was gone, he rolled on his back and looked at the stars with a sigh. “Aiheu, I wish I were dead!”
CHAPTER: THE NEXT DAY
Baba was anxious to hear news of his matchmaking game, but his mother's polite smile prepared him for disappointment. “It was interesting,” she said. “Things just didn’t work out. I felt guilty, like I was about to cheat on my husband, and he felt like he was sneaking out on his wife. In the end, we just sat and talked politely. He’s a good friend, and I’m glad I got to know him better, but neither one of us had nerve to go make love."
King Mabatu passed by. “Hello Baba. Good morning, Kako.”
“Good morning to you too,” she said. “I trust you slept well?”
“Yes, thank you.” He glanced at her longingly and trembled. “I enjoyed our little chat last night.”
“So did I,” she said, following the curves of his mane and the build of his shoulders with her eyes. She had to look away. Baba did not know what to look for, or he would have seen much that morning.
Listless and somewhat detached from the rest of the world, Kako went through the motions of her morning routine, taking a long cool drink from the stream, grooming her face and neck with a paw, and settling down for a nap with the Pride Sisters. Only her eyes rarely closed, and during a brief bout with sleep, she twitched and moaned a great deal, waking with a start and crying, “I can't!”
Mabatu fared little better. Baba saw him perched on a kopje, watching the goings on of the savanna with a sullen, withdrawn air. He climbed up and sat next to his father. “What’s wrong, Dad? Are you feeling sick?
“No, son. I was just thinking.”
“About what?”
“About you. How much I loved you, and how much I’d give up for you. You do love me too, don’t you?”
“For shame!” Baba buried his head in the old king’s mane and purred affectionately. “Of course I love you! I owe you my very life!”
Mabatu leaned on him. “Son, those words carry a bitter irony you can’t understand now. But someday you will.”
“What does that mean?”
Mabatu pawed his shoulder. “You have a son now. Bringing him into the world was one of life’s sweetest pleasures, but raising him is one of life’s hardest responsibilities. Look around at these faces. On the surface, they appear to be looking in every direction. But deep down inside they are all looking to me for protection and guidance. And someday they will all be looking to you. You see, son, there’s only one difference between you and a rogue lion.”
“What’s that?”
“A rogue lion has nothing to lose. Always remember that.” He laughed bitterly. “Listen to the old lion going on. I’m rambling and not making any sense.”
“I think you make lots of sense,” Baba said. “I never knew my real father, but I don’t feel so bad about it now.” He rested his head on Mabatu. “What did I do to deserve all this?”
The king purred. “You made an old lion feel much better. That is enough.”
That evening, Kako tried to lose herself in the hunt. But she does not concentrate well. One of her daughters said, “How do you stand it? I mean, you’re in your season--you and him together alone!”
“This is one subject not to mention in front of Baba or Isha. Is that understood?”
“Sure, Mom. But you were taking a big risk last night being alone with Dad. It’s clear to all of us that you still love him.”
“I kept my head about me. Nothing happened.”
“Oh? Really? You weren’t even tempted for a moment?”
“My son lives, doesn’t he? My love for your father is strong, but my mother love is even stronger. God bless him, Baba was trying to fix me up with a date. He doesn’t know, and he must never know why your Dad and I are not together.”
“I think it’s a shame to give up so much and not be able to tell him.”
“I think it would be a worse shame to have him feel guilty.”
“True, true," the others said.
Kako sounded in control and very rational, but she could barely concentrate on the task at hand and she was very forgetful. Umande watched her in anguish as she strove to act normal with the turmoil she felt inside.
Kako taught them Uzuri’s crescent formation, and they decided to use it. She took up her old post on the left point, but gave the pre-arranged signals with her ears that guided the others unfailingly through the steps of the predatory ballet.
Wildebeests had congregated on the meadow near the termite mounds. The splashing of water in the creek was a perfect cover for the delicate leonine tread that brought the huntresses ever closer.