They must have been worried about my health, for Johan Boyers was sent for again.
His coming was a great joy to me—not only because he was a familiar face from my happy past but because he had good news for me.
He waited until we were alone, then he said: “Owen is free.”
“Free!”
“He has escaped from Newgate.”
“Oh…they will catch him.”
“He will not be caught. He will be too clever for them. He eluded the guards and got right away. He is in Wales, I believe. He got a message through to me for you.”
“Oh, Johan…is this true?”
“He says…he will be with you…as soon as it is possible. He said, ‘Tell the Queen that we shall be together again. It will be my greatest aim that this shall be so.’”
I was silent. I was unaware that I was weeping until I tasted the salt tears on my lips.
I shall never see Owen again. When he comes it will be too late.
Everyone around me knows it. They are very kind and gentle.
I was so shocked when I came to them. I became so weak…too weak to recover from the premature birth of my little girl.
So…I am dying. I still have the strength to hold my pen. My spirits have lightened a little. I no longer have to look ahead to long years without Owen and the children. I shall be reunited with them one day. I know it.
Today is New Year’s Day.
I had a gift which gave me great pleasure because it was from my son. So Henry had not forgotten me. He would have come to my aid if he could, I always knew. And this was his way of saying so. He had sent me a gold tablet on which was a crucifix set with pearls and sapphires.
My poor Henry! He is only fifteen years old. The tablet tells me that he would have helped me…if he could.
I prayed then…deeply and sincerely…for him, my son. May his life be easy. May the burden of the crown sit lightly on his head.
I am too tired to write more. It cannot be long now. I pray for Owen’s safety and for the happiness of my children and all those who have loved and served me well during my life, which is soon to end.
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