"I will, believe me," she agreed. He felt her slowly, gingerly slide off of him, then sit down demurely on her legs in the middle of the dark, cluttered alley, putting a hand to her ribs with the other on the ground to hold her up. Tarrin got up and moved some distance away, getting ready to change back.
Not yet, the voice of the Goddess touched him.
He looked up into the sky curiously. "Goddess?" he asked in the manner of the Cat.
Yes, it's me, she answered winsomely. Tarrin, my sweet kitten, you have done so well. I am so proud of you I could cry. You have made me very happy.
He felt a bit foolish, lowering his head. "I'm just doing what you told me to do, Goddess," he said meekly. "I don't need frilly thanks."
Yes, you do, she replied. You are entitled to a little basking, my kitten. Despite everything, you have triumphed, and that is something that you will always have. But as you've already realized, we have simply won one game to begin another. And that's why I need to talk to you.
Tarrin looked to Sarraya, who was looking on soberly. The pain was evident on her face, but she said nothing, just watching him. She knew he was speaking to the Goddess, she could understand him perfectly when he spoke in the manner of the cat.
Because you have won, I am now allowed to give you information that I wouldn't have been able to give you, she began. It isn't much, but it will help you greatly in many ways. The first bit of this information concerns the others. Tarrin, my kitten, you cannot rejoin them.
"Why not?" he asked immediately, standing up and looking to the sky.
Because if you do, it will kill them, she replied gently. What you carry has caused you to become the most sought after being on the world. By tomorrow, everyone in Dala Yar Arak is going to know that you have the book. That puts anyone with you in terrible danger. The others are on Renoit's ship, and intend to sail away with him. If you are there, Renoit's ship will be attacked, and all of you will perish. They know of your alliance with him. The Arakites, the Zakkites, Wikuni, every interest with a ship in the water will come after you. If you attempt to leave by sea, you will perish, no matter what ship you are on. Don't ask me why, I'm not going to tell you. Just trust me on this. In fact, if you wish to save the others, you must give yourself away. You must do this, my kitten. You must let them know where you are, and allow them to chase you. Only then will they abandon their interest in your friends and come after you. It will be dangerous, but I already know how you feel about keeping the others out of danger. Because of that, you must be in an area where you have the advantage. You must stay on land. Only then will you have the ability to outrun them. My kitten, no horse can match you in running a great distance, and once you are far enough away, you can change back to your cat form and simply go west.
Tarrin bowed his head. It made sense. His presence would certainly pose a serious threat to anyone around him. And on the water, on the sea, there was nowhere to hide, he was at the mercy of the ship on which he rode and the winds that made it move. On the land, where he could run, he had the advantage. A horse could sprint faster than him, but he could hold a pace long after any horse that tried to match him literally ran itself to death. On the land, he could go in any direction, and he could outrun his pursuers. And when he changed into cat form, there would be no others to be exposed. There would only be him. It made sense, but it hurt him. To be separated from the others, to be separated from Allia, it would be terrible. He'd feel lost without his sister at his side, giving him her love and her support, gently guiding him with her quiet wisdom. He had already had Keritanima taken from him, and now he was going to lose Allia as well. But if the Goddess said that was the way things had to be, then that was the way things had to be. It was just that simple. He didn't have to like it, he just had to do it.
"I understand," he said quietly.
I knew you would, and I know how it pains you. But don't worry. You'll see them again. I promise you that.
"What else do I need to know?"
Only this. You must return to the Tower, in Suld. The Book of Ages will be useless to you unless you return it to Suld. The location of the Firestaff is not within its pages, my kitten, but a means to find that information does exist within it. That is why you must return to the Tower. That is the only place where you can find out what you need to know.
That made his fur stand up. The Tower. He hoped he'd never see that place again. It was full of bad memories, and he didn't trust anyone there. And there was still a ki'zadun spy in the Tower, someone that would make going back there a very dangerous proposition. But again, he had no choice. He would have to go back, no matter how much he hated it.
Sitting down, lowering his head, he reflected on that news a bit, then realized what it meant. He would have to travel thousands of leagues, either on foot or overland. The Goddess told him not to get on a boat, and he would not get on a boat, unless it was a ferry crossing a river. He would have to cross the arid steppes of Arak, the dusty plains of Saranam, even the Desert of Swirling Sands. He would have to climb the Sandshield Mountains and cross the West. Suld was on the coast, about as far from Dala Yar Arak as it could get. It was a journey of mind-shuddering proportions for one to undertake on land. About as dangerous as a journey could get. If he made it out of Arak and Saranam alive, he'd have to cross the most inhospitable ground in the entire world, the Desert of Swirling Sands. Full of Selani, who would see him as an enemy, and the exotic, deadly beasts which called the desert home.
It would be extremely dangerous. But facing extreme danger seemed to be what he was meant to do.
"I will do as you command, Goddess," he said dutifully.
I think I'd like it better if you did as I asked, my kitten, she replied sharply. You know that I care for you. I would feel much better if you would admit that you obey me because you wish to, not because you have to. I know your heart, my kitten.
He lowered his head. That was exactly why he obeyed. He loved her, she was his Goddess, and he would do anything she asked. Because he loved her.
"I love you, Goddess," he said simply, sincerely, straight from his heart.
He felt that same glory through the link to her, the sensation that her own power flared to life in some strange way.
Tarrin, if anything, what you have just given to me is better than any act of faith or deed of bravery, she said with strange power. You are my champion, Tarrin Kael, and you have done my will better than I could have ever hoped. I am proud of you. We all are.
"Goddess… Mother, what I did today. Was it possible?"
Your Druidic magic? My dear kitten, it is not only possible, it is what you were meant to be from the beginning. You are the Mi'Shara. In time, you will understand its true meaning.
"It means I could be a priest too, right?"
You already are, she said winsomely. As you realized before, my children are my priests. They tend my flock, which happens to be the very priests among them, and they do my will. I just don't grant them my power like other gods grant to their priests. You summed it up nicely, kitten. You already have my power. I just give it to you in a different way.
"I figured as much."
You are much wiser than you give yourself credit for, my kitten. When you want to be. Now call me that again.
"What?"
Mother.
Tarrin would have smiled sheepishly. "You're just like Triana, Mother. All bluster and pretend. You make a big deal out of establishing your dominance, then you tell me to forget all that and treat you like my own mother."
If I were mortal, she and I would be very close friends, the Goddess laughed. Now go, my champion. Your time is running out. You must be off, to lead your pursuers away and keep the others safe. They need you right now.
"Can I say goodbye?" he asked quietly.
Just be brief, she said. They are very close to you. You will only have a moment, and when you finish, you must run.
"Alright. Mother-"