But the question remained, how long would they stay? What if they would never leave?
Cowdrey frowned. A veteran teacher had told him, “When you teach, your life becomes the kids and the classroom. If there’s anything else distracting you, then you’re not doing the job.” Of course, another teacher, equally experienced, countered, “Teaching is what you do. Life is why you do it.”
He left the practice room. Pulsing sound greeted him when he opened the door into the percussionist’s area. Their eyes didn’t leave their music, and at the place where the bass drums kicked in, with the snares beating out a complicated counter-rhythm, he could feel his heart’s pounding change to match it. Watching their hands blur to follow the music, seeing the vibrations from the instruments’ side, he noticed for the first time how thick-wristed the drummers had become, like tennis pros who gained an overdeveloped forearm on their racket side, except for them both arms bulged. When Cowdrey had been in college, he went out to dinner with a long-time drummer. On a bet, the fellow had grabbed one table edge with his fingertips, and lifted it, drinks and dinner plates and all by the strength of his hands and wrists. “Years and years working a drum set, and look what it got me, a party trick.” The drummer laughed.
Once again, Cowdrey saw that the kids weren’t ninth graders any more. When it ended, the section leader turned to him. “I thought these changes in the backbeat Elise wrote were wonky when I saw them on the page, but once we got going on them, wow!” Others in the section nodded.
The morning unfolded. Session after session, the kids’ growth struck him. They weren’t in any real sense a school band anymore. They had evolved into something that had never existed in humanity before, because where before in human history had these conditions existed?
But it wasn’t until he stood outside his room before lunch that he made up his mind. Elise turned the corner with her clipboard in hand, her notes for the day covering the top sheet. Instead of showing them to him, she stopped to look at the blank wall where Miss Rhodes’s door once had been. Clearly she hadn’t noticed the disparity in the hallway. Elise touched the wall. For a second, Cowdrey worried she pictured what he had seen when he raised the nerve to go into Rhodes’s room uninvited: the sheet twisted into a rope, the cloth cutting into her neck, the pathetic letters home she’d been writing since the first day they’d arrived.
Elise placed her palm flat on the wall where the door used to be. “It’s adapt or die all the time, isn’t it?”
Her crooked glasses made her look childish, but the top of her head stood almost level with his chin. He remembered when she’d been just a tiny 7th grader who handled her flute with an older musician’s authority, but whose feet didn’t reach the ground when she sat to play. Cowdrey knew then that Elise had become the band’s heart. She drew the thread that kept them together so far, not his efforts, but hers. She held the late-night meetings with the section leaders to go over changes in music. She organized the informal ensembles. She had the energy others could draw on, including himself.
“Yes, it is.” He took a deep breath. Cowdrey could feel the shift in his thinking happen. Suddenly, he wasn’t a junior high band director. He was an older adult trapped with fifty competent young adults, if he could let them be that. If he could adapt to change. “Let’s get them ready for the practice this evening, shall we?”
Elise raised her eyebrows.
That evening, Cowdrey took the podium. Under his hands, he held the music for the practice and his baton. Paper-clipped to the top sheet were his notes for areas to emphasize along with Elise’s comments. The group fidgeted and chattered as they always did before practice. Cowdrey liked standing before the full band, when the day’s work came together and he could measure the progress, and even though he hated the circumstances, he had to admit he’d never had a better performance facility. The light. The sound. The way the space flowed around them. Only the smokey windows and the hidden audience jarred.
He picked up the baton. They looked at him expectantly. “Breathing first, Cougars. I’ll count off the seconds. Inhale.” He tapped eight seconds with the baton while they filled their lungs. “Hold.” With metronomic regularity he tapped out twenty-four more beats. They exhaled for eight, relaxed for ten, and then repeated twice more. At the end, the percussionists finished their set up and the band waited. Breathing exercises calmed them, put them into the right mind. In his classroom at the junior high, which he could barely picture now, he’d hung a banner at the front: ALL MUSIC BEGINS WITH A GOOD BREATH (AND DIES WITH A LACK THEREOF).
Now they were ready. “An issue has come up that I think needs to be addressed. As most of you know, Taylor Beau and Liz Waters have asked my permission to marry.” Whatever whispering that might have been going on when he started the speech lapsed into silence. For an instance, Cowdrey pictured the school board and all the parents sitting in the back. What would they say at this announcement? Would they understand? He brushed aside the image, then plunged ahead. “I have thought about the request for a long time. Considering our situation and Taylor and Liz’s character, I think they would make a fine married couple.”
Before the last syllable had time to fade, the band erupted into cheers and gleeful laughter. The attention at first focused on Liz and Taylor, who cried and hugged awkwardly from their chairs, their cornets still in hand, but soon Cowdrey saw a good number had surrounded Elise, shaking her hand and clapping her on the back. Cowdrey’s jaw dropped. He had, in every sense, been orchestrated. Finally, in the midst, Elise caught his eye and mouthed, “Thank you.” He touched his forehead in rueful respect.
Thomas put his French horn on his chair, waiting his chance to congratulate the happy couple. A trombone player stood beside him, and they smiled as they chatted. It seemed as if it had been weeks since Cowdrey could remember Thomas looking relaxed. Cowdrey thought, a good decision and a distraction in one move. He smiled too.
Elise worked her way over to him. “We’ll need a wedding march.”
“I think Mendelssohn’s is in my books. That would be traditional. Besides, it would be appropriate. He was seventeen when he wrote it.” Cowdrey reached past her to high five a couple flute players who had joined a conga line.
Elise shook her head. “That’s a myth, I think. He wrote it later. Anyway, I have something I’ve been working on. Something of my own.” Her eyes lowered.
“Why am I not surprised?”
It took the band a half hour to settle down. They cut the practice early after just two run throughs of the Beatles medley.
For the first time in two years, Cowdrey didn’t walk the halls before going to bed. We are adults here, he thought. The paradigm has shifted. He sighed as he lay down, believing when he went to sleep his dreams would be undisturbed and packed with beautifully played music, but after an hour trying to convince himself he’d changed, he rose, dressed, and walked the hall, listening at each door. Satisfied at last, he went back to his room, and his dreams played undisturbed with flawless performances.
In the morning, he found a note pushed under his door. “A wedding will not get us home. They want a perfect performance! Get us home!” Cowdrey snorted in disgust. Nobody could know what they wanted. They might not want anything. He folded the note in half and put it inside his band management book. Even the Perfectionists couldn’t bother him today, and they wouldn’t, at least until after the wedding. And who knows, he thought, sometimes the best way to a long term goal is to focus on a short term one.
Elise distributed the new march to the section leaders, who organized a music-transcribing session. For over an hour, the band met in the auditorium to make their copies. “You’d think if aliens could snatch us up to play concerts, they could at least provide a decent photocopier,” grumbled the oboist, who had several dozen bars of sixteenths and two key changes to write for herself.