His own brother, her Uncle Cumberland whom she had never liked! In fact she had found him a little sinister with his one glittering eye (he had lost the other before she was born, at the battle of Tournay) and she had always felt that he resented her.
But what a wicked thing to say about her father!
She turned on Mrs Udney and would have struck her if the woman had not hastily retreated.
‘I’m only telling you what you asked,’ began Mrs Udney.
‘Don’t ever say that again,’ cried Charlotte. ‘Don’t ever say it. I … I’ll kill anyone who says it.’
She ran to her bedroom and threw herself on to her bed.
She kept thinking of her mother and her father and how they hated each other and how so many people seemed to hate them.
In her apartments at Kensington Palace the Princess of Wales embraced her daughter.
‘If you only knew how I long for these hours, my little Charlotte. Oh, if you only knew,’ she cooed. ‘But I am allowed so little. It’s a scandal. Of all the scandals in this family this is the greatest. To be allowed to see my own daughter for an hour now and then. I tell you I will not endure it. I will make such a big noise one day that they’ll be sorry. Oh, yes, they will.’
Charlotte gave herself up to the warm, almost suffocating hug. Mamma’s wig as usual was a little awry and strands of her own grey hair were visible beneath it. It was so black that her heavily painted cheeks made her look like a grotesque doll. The dress she was wearing – mauve satin trimmed with ribbons and lace – was very low-cut and none too clean, being stained with food, and Charlotte could quite understand how the immaculate and fastidious Regent was disgusted.
But she loves me, thought Charlotte; she is warmhearted to me and he is so cold. Yet it was his love she wanted. Why could she not be satisfied with her mother’s love which, whenever they met, seemed to be so intense?
‘Well, tell me all your news, my angel. How is de old Begum? Pestering you, I know. Interfering old crocodile, saying “This shall be done” and “That shall be done” and making my little Charlotte’s life a burden. I know de old Begum.’
‘When I’m at Warwick House I don’t have to see her often. It’s at Windsor.’
‘Ah, Windsor … gloomy old place! Cold and draughty … ugh! I was saying to darling Willie only the other day, “Willie,” I said, “they can keep their castle. We’re much better at Blackheath.” ’
‘And how is Willie?’ A purely rhetorical question, for she had no wish to know how the obnoxious child fared.
‘Willie!’ called the Princess. ‘Come here, Willie. Charlotte wants to see you. Oh, the naughty boy. He does not come.’
‘Never mind, Mamma. I want you to myself for the little time I have with you.’
‘My sweet, sweet Charlotte.’ More damp kisses and displays of affection which set the wig more awry and the gown slipping farther off the shoulders.
‘So what are they doing to you, eh? What is Madam de Clifford saying now? Trying to stop you having a little fun, eh? It is time you are done with governesses. Governesses! Dey are for children. And my Lottie is a young woman now, eh? And she has her little flirtations. Oh, I know. George Fitzclarence … Captain Hesse. Now there is a young man I have one big fancy for. Captain Hesse – he is not very tall but he is a very attractive man.’ Caroline burst out laughing. ‘You find him so … and so does your Mamma.’
‘Captain … Hesse has visited you?’
‘Often he comes. He is a very great favourite here. “You are very welcome, Captain Hesse,” I say to him. “Come whenever you care to. We are always happy to see you.” And he comes often. Sometimes I think he comes hoping to have a word with you. He thinks how much more comfortable here than in the forest where you may be seen and spied on … Oh, yes, my Charlotte, you are surrounded by spies.’
Charlotte was taken aback that so much should be known of her friendship with Captain Hesse – those secret meetings in the forest, the letters which Mrs Udney helped to smuggle in to her. The occasional kiss when they thought no one was watching them.
Had they been seen and reported to her mother? She was horrified at the thought of such conduct coming to her father’s ears. He would despise her and dislike her more than ever.
‘Mamma,’ she began, but the Princess of Wales was not listening.
‘You are treated like a child,’ she went on. ‘It is time you are free. My poor little Charlotte who is watched over and spied on by these stern old women. They are all under the rule of de old Begum. Charlotte, my love, you must not let them crush you. Get rid of that silly snuffling de Clifford. Tell her she’s an old idiot and tell your father too. Does he visit you? Ha! What a spectacle he is making of himself, running after that lump of ice. He’ll never get into her bed. He would have done better to stay with the Fitzherbert. I’ve always said it and I say it now. She was the one for him and the people would have thought a lot more of him if he’d stuck to her.’
A lady at the door was announcing an arrival. Charlotte looked up eagerly. One never knew what kind of people one was going to meet in her mother’s apartments. The most colourful characters mingled with the most disreputable and there was a sprinkling of politicians, all of whom Charlotte suspected were endeavouring to stir up strife between her mother and father.
But here was a surprise which sent the blood to her cheeks. Captain Hesse came into the room. He bowed from the waist, German fashion.
Charlotte cried inelegantly: ‘Oh, so it’s you.’
‘Always at Your Highness’s service,’ he responded gallantly. He looked very handsome in his uniform of an officer of the Light Dragoons, and although he was short there was a look of the Duke of York about him.
‘A surprise for you both, you naughty children!’ cried Caroline archly.
After that, whenever Charlotte visited her mother Captain Hesse would be there also.
It was a shame, declared Caroline, that Charlotte was treated like a child by her father and his mother. She had no fun at all. Her Mamma was going to make sure that when she came to her she should enjoy herself.
She was soon conveying letters from the Captain to her daughter and Charlotte, always ready to take up her pen, responded.
This was romantic adventure and it gave a spice to life. The monotony of Warwick House was considerably relieved; she would laugh to herself when she listened to the Queen’s lectures. They might treat her like a child and she was amused thinking of what they would say if they could read those letters which were passing between her and Captain Hesse.
It was all so simple, with her mother acting as the go-between and making it possible for them to meet.
Charlotte often wondered what her father would say if he knew of this. Serve him right, she thought. He takes no interest in me.
There came a day when even Charlotte began to feel some alarm. Her mother behaved in such an odd way but perhaps never so dangerously odd as she did on this occasion.
Charlotte had paid the prescribed visit to find Captain Hesse in her mother’s drawing room where Caroline made them sit together on a sofa very close while she talked of the manner in which Charlotte was treated by her father and grandmother.
‘Like a child, you understand, mon capitaine. And she is not a child. But they would lock her up and say No to this and No to that … No to everything that is nice and pleasant, and Yes, Yes, Yes to everything that is a tiresome bore. She has de old fool de Clifford always at her elbow. Is it not a shame, mon capitaine? But when she comes to see her mother … which is not often enough because her wicked father keeps her from me … she is going to enjoy herself. Someone must be kind to my darling Charlotte.’