"You're lovely when you're bossy, little admiral."
"Oh, go away."
"Like I said, what will you tell people? Here tonight, gone tomorrow?"
Eve had a ready answer. "I'll tell them that you had an emergency to attend, and had to make haste. Haste to Hades, if I had my way."
Adam snorted. "Now, now. Good little wives don't tell their husbands of just a few hours to go to hell." He lifted her chin with his hand and stared deep into her eyes. While only fools rushed in where angels feared to tread, still, he thought smugly, he was in good company in a madhouse. The place was jammed to the rafters with fools.
"How could you think I would leave you again?" he asked. "I've just returned to you, my darling. We need quality time together, and a quantity of it. We have merrymaking to manage and beds to muss. I say we start now!"
"Argh!" Eve's pirate growl burst forth in full force as she shoved him backward, losing all sense of propriety. "You impossible impersonator! Have you no shame for the sham you have perpetrated tonight? You are a villain of the worst sort, a seeker of booty and ill-gotten gains. And your acting abilities are far from laudable—they're laughable." She brandished a fireplace poker like a rapier, all agility and grace.
But in a lightning-quick move, he took it away from her. "How dare you disparage my acting? Not to boast, but I thought I was rather brilliant as your husband," he said.
He cast a wounded expression at her and placed a hand over his chest. "And I did dress to please you," he added. After a moment he said, "And by the way, I'm not immune to flattery, should you decide to try it."
She glanced at the fireplace poker in his hand. Reading her thoughts, he shook his head.
"I wouldn't try it. I'm bigger, badder, and faster than you are."
"You're an actor? My father hired an actor? We're doomed. Someone will recognize you."
"Now, don't worry your pretty little head. Only once or twice have I trodden the boards—when I needed a quick infusion of coinage. It really wasn't my style, all those dreary road trips into backwaters. Of course, there were legions of fawning women. And I did get raves for my performances. Tonight I outdid myself. No woman dead or alive—or undead—could have asked for more."
"Oh, what utter rubbish! You are far from perfect. No man is perfect," she stated emphatically. "Believe me, I lived with men on the Jolly Roger for twelve years, and it was far from jolly or perfect!" Eve felt like she was floundering in deep water, not unlike what she often felt when arguing with her father. "I won't have you for a husband. I positively refuse."
"You can't escape. If your fraud is discovered, you'll see no funding. Come now, Eve, you don't really want people to know what a little charlatan you are. You would be ruined, and all your woolly-headed schemes would have been for naught. Admit it. You're truly caught in the net, my dear."
Narrowing her eyes, Eve quietly despised him. Her fall from grace had plunged her into matrimony, and she wished her husband to the bottom of the sea. "Me, the charlatan? What nerve you have." But he spoke the truth. She could not dispute Adam's presence, and she knew it.
So did Captain Bluebeard.
And so did Adam, whatever his real name was. They had hoist her by her own petard.
Adam studied her closely as a myriad of emotions sluiced through her, from rage to hostility to culpability to irate resignation.
"I suppose he paid you well, my father?"
Her husband grinned. "But of course. And aren't you relieved to know that you aren't married to a fool? Of everyone he could engage, you should count your blessings that it was someone who didn't come to you with my pockets—or skull space—to let." Then he quieted, apparently believing he'd yanked her chain enough.
Counting to twenty to regain her composure, Eve drew a deep breath. She wasn't going to let him get another rise out of her; she was beginning to see how he teased her dreadfully just to get her dander up. "That remains to be seen," she grumbled.
Unfortunately, an infernally feminine part of her couldn't help but note how his hazel eyes twinkled and his lips curled up rather sweetly, while he was teasing her. She even reluctantly admitted that he would be quite handsome if he weren't her hoodwinking husband. She didn't want to find him attractive; not one whit.
He spoke again, apparently ready to go another round: "I must insist that next time I choose the guest list. That count was a pompous bag of wind, Dr. Crane is a yahoo if I ever saw one, and Dr. Sigmund is all ego."
Eve sank into a chair, her head in her hands. "I will never, ever forgive my fiendish father," she said.
Adam knelt before her, prying both her hands away from her face. "Come now, love, it's not that horrid a fate. Captain Bluebeard simply wants grandchildren to spoil in his old age." Rubbing her hands with his thumbs he added, "And I'm just the man for the task."
She wanted to yank her hands back, but the gentle rubbing motion on her palms was calming. She, better than anyone, knew what overwrought nerves could do, being both a psychiatrist and a child of a Bluebeard. "He'll be Captain Graybeard before I present him with one," she stated firmly. She had no intention of giving in to this slight attraction.
Adam chuckled. "And I was so looking forward to the begetting."
Shoving him hard, she snapped. "Oh, go away and leave me in peace!" She frowned, tempted to offer him a bribe in place of a bride, but she couldn't spare any coin. Every last one was engaged in taking care of the asylum. Besides, no booty she had could match the booty her father had already promised.
"Afraid I can't do that, my sweet. I gave my word to your father, and I am a man of honor," Adam replied. "Although, I must admit that when he approached me I thought he was stark raving mad. But after listening to the Captain's plan, I recognized its brilliance. Pretending to being Or. Adam Griffin is just what the doctor ordered."
"Honor, my fanny! You wouldn't know honor if it jumped up and bit your arse," Eve growled.
"Ah, but I do. And because of this honor, I could never betray your father. I have reason to be indebted to Captain Bluebeard. Besides, he'd have me filleted if I ever crossed him. Therefore, without further 'I do,' I'm here to stay."
Eve knew her father's vengeful nature, and she wouldn't wish it on her worst enemy, who just now happened to be this handsome impostor. Without a fortune to tempt the so-called Adam, it appeared she was stuck with him. For now. Still, husbands had been known to disappear. And she was too tired to squabble any more tonight. She had concerns to take care of before finally being able to lay her head down on her pillow for the night, so she said, "Without further ado, I've got a patient to see." And she began to leave the room.
"It's rather late to be seeing patients."
"Not when you're a psychiatrist and and the patient is a vampire."
Adam's brow furrowed. He opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it, saying instead, "Be careful out there."
She ignored his face and words, as well as the hint of concern in his voice. She was just plain weary, and still had a patient to see. Tomorrow she'd start planning the impersonator's departure. She could outwit this rogue or she wasn't Bluebeard's daughter.
Chapter Nine
An Apple a Day Might Keep Adam Away
Upon awakening in the morning, Eve was irritated at discovering her bedding in wild disarray. Not surprising, she mused. Her dreams had been vivid and frightening in their content, filled with pirates trying to pillage her ports and kiss her senseless. She climbed out of bed and, instead of waiting for her maid to help her dress, began to slip on undergarments, her mind rolling over possibilities, trying to come up with a foolproof plan for getting rid of the fool posing as her husband. Unfortunately, for all her plotting, Adam wasn't just anybody, since he was in league with her father.