Kaden firmly shook his head. “We’re not having that discussion again.”
“Okay.”
Seth quietly rode home with Kaden. Two years! That would…well, it would still suck that they’d lose Kaden, but he wasn’t taking a single day for granted.
As if sensing his friend’s thoughts, Kaden said, “Don’t you say a word to her about the appointment. Especially two years. If you tell her that and it happens next month, it’ll kill her.”
“I know. I won’t.” No, he wouldn’t tell Leah.
But he’d hold on to his private, silent hope.
The airport limo arrived early on Wednesday morning to drive Kaden up to Tampa International. The three of them took a few minutes hugging and saying good-bye. After Kaden hugged and kissed Leah, he hugged Seth. “Love you, man.”
“Love you, too. Still not doing you.”
Kaden laughed, which made Seth smile. “Still not doing you, either. Take care of our girl for me.” He shook his finger at Leah and dropped his voice. “You behave yourself. You listen to Sir, love. Remember, make Me proud.”
Her skin flushed, and she nodded. “Yes, Master,” she whispered.
“Good girl, love. I’ll be home day after tomorrow.” He hugged and kissed her one more time before stepping into the waiting car. When it drove off, Seth followed Leah into the house.
Without classes to study for, Seth threw himself into his BDSM training. He had already read every book Kaden owned on the subject and spent hours practicing shibari with Leah. Later that afternoon they moved to the lanai for more whip training with the singletail.
His aim had improved, although he didn’t trust himself with a live target yet, even one wearing protective clothing. He was still too erratic in his throwing style and worried about hurting someone. But he had worked up to forty-five minutes at a time with the thing.
They quietly ate dinner on the couch in front of the TV. Seth felt Leah’s tension grow as the night wore on. Kaden called around nine, which helped her for a little while. Seth played guitar for her, sticking with more upbeat tunes he hoped would keep her out of her funk.
While he’d made her come several times as part of their sessions, an admittedly irrational mental justification allowed him to see that as part of something necessary for her. But to make love to her in a romantic, give-and-take way still lay beyond his mental and emotional ability to cope with no matter how okay his body apparently was with it. Hell, he was still trying cope with the fact that Kaden was dying when he looked so healthy.
They were just going to have to give him the time he needed to wrap his freaking head around it or he’d lose his mind.
Close to bedtime he sensed her disquiet. He pulled an ace out of his sleeve.
“Love”—it still felt strange to call her that—“I want you to sleep with me tonight. I’m very tired and just want to cuddle.” He leaned close and dropped his voice to a firm growl. “But only sleep. If you don’t behave, I’ll have to tell Master you were not a good girl.”
She smiled. “I’ll behave.”
He kissed her forehead. “Very good. I think I’d be more comfortable if you slept in my bed tonight. Go get ready.”
“What should I wear to sleep in?”
While he’d let her run around naked more often, there was no way he could share a bed with her naked. “Long T-shirt.” She started to look pouty, and he growled again. “Listen, I’m going to be sleeping with you. Remember, you’re letting me ease into this. It’s one step closer.”
That lifted her spirits. She went to get ready, and he returned to his bedroom and left the door open.
He usually slept naked, but tonight he put on a pair of sleeping shorts. No way in hell would he risk it.
When they finally curled up together he spooned against her back and enjoyed the way his arm perfectly fit around her waist. Did she fit Kaden’s body this well?
Oh, cut that shit out right now. That was not a healthy line of thought. Not a place he even wanted to think about going.
Surprisingly, even though he thought his cock might want to stiffen, he fell asleep. And he awoke from that sound sleep around two a.m., when he felt her shift in his arms and sit up.
“What’s wrong?” he mumbled.
She didn’t answer. His heart hammered in his chest, and he sat up, pulling her to him. “What’s wrong?”
She still didn’t answer but let him pull her closer. “I miss him,” she finally whispered.
“I know, babe.” He tried to relax. “It’s okay.”
He coaxed her into lying down next to him, but she wasn’t settled by any stretch of the imagination. In a fit of inspiration, he told her to roll onto her stomach. She did.
He gently stroked her back and enjoyed the soft, pleasant sounds she made at his touch.
Now his cock tried to stiffen.
“Do you need to feel the bite?” he whispered.
“A little,” she admitted.
He swatted her, bare-handed, across her ass. She jumped. He swatted her again, and he knew he didn’t imagine it when she wiggled her hips against his hand and buried her face deeper into her pillow.
He spanked her as hard as he could, a total of twenty swats, leaving his hand stinging. When he finished she was breathing heavily, her body practically vibrating on the mattress next to him.
“Where are we, love?”
“Green, Sir,” she said with a sigh.
He slid one hand between her legs and found her clit. She squirmed against the mattress, and in a few minutes she moaned into the pillow when she came.
It was almost like she melted into the bed from the sudden relaxation that swept over her.
He curled around her again, hoping she was too out of it to feel his stiff erection pressing against her backside.
After another hour, he finally fell asleep.
When he awoke the next morning, he almost panicked when he realized she wasn’t in bed with him. “Leah?”
“I’m getting coffee,” she called from the kitchen.
Deep sigh of relief. If he fucked up and she did something while Kaden was gone, he’d never forgive himself. He got out of bed and used the bathroom. By the time he finished she was walking through the bedroom door with a beautiful smile on her face and his cup of morning goodness in her hands.
“Thank you, sweetie.”
She paused, as if waiting for something else. He leaned in and kissed her forehead. He wanted to plant a deep one on her lips and knew that would lead to spending all day in bed with her.
Wait, why was he fighting?
Because she’s still my best friend’s wife, that’s why.
“You’re welcome, Sir.”
Oh crap, formal.
“Are you okay, hon?”
She nodded and only a little cloud flitted through her eyes. “Is it okay if I’m formal?”
“Sure.”
She relaxed. If it helped her, he’d do it. “Thank you, Sir.”
“What’s on the agenda for today?”
“Master said for me to work with You on the ropes and the singletail.”
Seth also knew he needed to mow. It’d been nearly a week. In the wet Florida climate, the lawn was growing at a jungle-inducing rate. “I need to do some chores first.”
“Will you go grocery shopping with me, Sir?”
Of course he would. He’d go to hell and back for her. Publix was easy. “Let me get my chores done first, and then we’ll go.”
She fixed his breakfast. Later, he noticed that she sat either on the front porch or back lanai and watched him mow. She reminded him of a lost child.
He was in the shower when Leah knocked on the bathroom door. “Sir?”