Richard talked of it later to me. He said: "It was always like that with George. He would do something very wrong and then he would beg for forgiveness. He was never denied it not by my brother nor my sister Margaret, whose favourite he was. Even my mother would relent for him."
So there had been another blow for my father. But it was more than that. The country wanted a king and who had the Kingmaker given them? Poor pathetic, saintly, half-mad Henry? Certainly not. They had Warwick to rule them. And Warwick, mighty as he was, lacked the aura of royalty.
What was happening in England, I asked myself as we waited there at Honfleur?
The sea was a little calmer.
"We cannot wait for ever," said Margaret.
"A great deal is happening in England. I should be there. We must delay no longer."
Prince Edward had joined us. He had gathered men and supplies from Louis and we were ready to cross. I heard that my mother was about to return to England and I was relieved also to be told that she was well. I wished that I could see her and could have been comforted by her presence all these months when I had been with the queen. But I should see my mother when I returned to England. I should also see Isabel.
The crossing was all that we had feared it would be and we arrived at Weymouth feeling battered and exhausted.
Sombre news awaited us there.
My father was dead. He had been killed at the Battle of Barnet.
At Warwick Court
It had happened just as we had embarked on that stormy sea. I could not believe it. To me he had always seemed indestructible. My poor mother, I thought. What is she feeling now? They had been deeply attached to each other. Although he was rarely with us, I had never heard of any infidelity on his part. She had brought him the means to become the man he was and I believed he was ever grateful to her for that. He had always treated her with the utmost respect. I think he cared for us children in his way. True, he had been about to involve me in a match which was most distasteful to me, but it was the rule for parents in his position to regard their daughters as instruments for bringing glory to the family.
"Warwick is dead!" We heard that everywhere. People talked of little else. He was no more the man who had been the most influential in England, the man whose power enabled him to make and unmake kings.
I felt lost in a bewildering world. My father dead! Where should we go now?
The queen took the news calmly. It occurred to me that, although she expressed her sorrow, she was not entirely displeased.
Warwick had set Henry up as king; he had carried out his part of the bargain. If he had lived, he would have wanted to rule. That was at the very root of his ambition. He had made kings that he might guide them and Margaret was not one to be guided. So now ... he had served his purpose. He had brought Henry back to the throne. And then ... he had fought at Barnet.
She was studying me speculatively. I guessed she was thinking: with Warwick no more, of what importance was his daughter?
She did not dislike me any more. In fact I believe she had a certain fondness for me. Perhaps she despised me a little because I was not ambitious, not fiercely desirous for a crown ... as she was. But there was some rapport between us and that hatred she had had for me in the beginning, as Warwick's daughter, was no longer there. She had even become reconciled to accepting me as a daughter-in-law.
But now where did I stand when my father was killed in battle? Perhaps she was wondering whether she need honour the pledge she had made to marry me to her son.
I would be wholeheartedly grateful to her if she would not agree to that.
What strange days they were days of much activity and terrible uncertainty.
Messages came to us from the Duke of Somerset. It would be advisable for us to go to Lancaster to rally troops. The Lancastrian cause had not been lost by the desertion of the Duke of Clarence and the death of the Earl of Warwick.
I wished that I could have seen my mother. I did receive a letter from her and it was heartbreaking to read it.
She was suffering deeply from the death of my father.
"I know not what will become of us," she wrote.
She told me that she was going to Beaulieu Abbey. I was not to worry about her. She hinted that she believed Edward would not be harsh with us.
It was a comfort to hear from her. I, of course, betrothed to the Prince of Wales, was as deeply embroiled as she was. The fact that I was innocently caught up in a matter for which I had no enthusiasm was of no account. I had become one of them now a Lancastrian. I was allied to my future mother-in-law, and I must needs follow her.
We set out from Weymouth. Margaret was full of energy. She rode at the head of the cavalcade with me beside her, and she rallied men to her cause as she went through the towns and villages. The impostor was back in England; he had murdered the worthy Earl of Warwick. She was caring for his poor fatherless daughter. The earl must be avenged. They must ride with her to drive base Edward out of the country.
By the time we reached Bath we had a small following. Therewe were met by riders who came from Wales with the news that Jasper Tudor was gathering together a fine army to fight for Henry.
Knowing of the queen's approach, Jasper Tudor had suggested that she join forces with him, for Edward of York, with his army, was not far away and, having got wind of their arrival, was bearing down on them.
After consultation with her captains that was what Margaret decided to do. I was full of admiration for her. She would have been an excellent commander if she could have dispensed with that arrogance. How different Edward was! He was friendly with the humblest soldier; he made them all feel they were all men together to work to the best of their ability, he no less than the lowest rank. His popularity was the secret of his success. There followed the fatal Battle of Tewkesbury. I was riding with Margaret at the head of the cavalcade when we were met by Prince Edward with the men he had assembled. He told us that Edward of York was in the vicinity and the two armies must soon come face to face.
The prince persuaded his mother to go with me to a small religious house on the road along which we were passing. He said the battle would be short and triumphant but he did not want to suffer the anxiety of knowing that his mother and I might be in danger. It seemed wise that we should remain with the nuns.
"I shall be content knowing you are there," he said.
"And I shall soon be with you to tell you of our victory."
I looked anxiously at the queen. She had been known to ride into battle with the army and for a moment I thought she was going to refuse.
"You must do as I say," he said.
"I leave my bride in your charge. How could I give myself to battle if I must be in a state of anxiety about your safety?"
I was aware of the thoughts which were passing through her mind. She was no longer young. It was ten years since Henry had lost his crown and she had lived in exile most of that time.
Edward was insistent and finally she gave way.
"We shall be waiting most eagerly," she told him.
"I know, dear lady mother. And you shall be the first to hear of our victory."
I was very relieved when at last she agreed to stay at the religious house to wait for news of the battle.
The nuns received us warmly. I doubted they were partisan. To them we were just two women in need of shelter. True, one of us was a queen and the other destined to become one, but I am sure, whoever we had been, they would have given us shelter.