“No, he’s not! Like… what does he say?” I’m completely blushing now and terribly curious about their secret dialogue.
“Everything! ‘Where is Dawn?’ ‘When did she get home?’ Why, just now he asked me if you got to school on time this morning.” She rolls her eyes.
“Yeah, I know. He did come over and wake me up this morning,” I admit shyly. “Do you think he worries about us, Terry?”
“I think he kind of feels a little like a father to us. I mean, he always asks me if you and I have eaten, he gives us jobs all the time, and he constantly brings me frozen Snickers bars. He calls them ‘Terry food.’ I get so embarrassed when he says that!” She blushes, her green eyes and freckles standing out against her red skin.
“But he knows how much you love them, Terry.” I laugh. “You’d kill for a frozen Snickers bar, and he knows it. I think that’s sweet.”
“I would not!” she insists and playfully tries to act indignant. “Well, maybe just a little.”
I hang out until Juan comes home from work. Wearing his white cook’s hat and apron, he looks greasy and tired. When he takes his hat off, his Afro is cocked to one side like a Dr. Seuss character’s, making Terry and me giggle. Juan raises his finger in an effort to scold us for poking fun at him, but he loses track of the thought as his drooping eyes zero in on the water bed. He flops down hard and immediately sends a loud, fake snore into the air.
“Hey, wake up!” Terry slaps him on the ass. Juan ignores her and snores even louder into the blankets.
“I said wake up, damn it! Where’s my dinner?” she demands, standing up and acting like she’s going to sit on him.
“Okay, okay! I’m up! I’m up!” He rolls to the edge of the bed just out of reach of Terry’s quick hand. “Over there, by the door.” He points to the sagging white hamburger bag slumped on the floor.
Terry and I race for the food and frantically pull out the cold, soggy burgers and fries. “Eww,” we complain. I see there is only enough for the two of them and decide it is time to give Terry and Juan their privacy and go check in at Harriet’s.
“I’ll see you guys in the morning. Let me know what Juan says about the beach, okay?” Without looking back, I smile to myself at the thought of sightseeing in our new home—California. I know Juan will agree to getting out and having some fun, and now as I enter the doorway to Harriet’s, I take a deep breath and look forward to the days ahead.
Like clockwork, John is at my door bright and early to wake me for school. This time I know the knock is John’s, and I stand modestly behind the door. We exchange brief hellos, and when he walks away, there is more of a friendly feeling between us.
Dad drives us to school again but informs us this is the last time; we will have to walk from now on; he just doesn’t feel well enough to be getting up and driving every morning.
“It’s okay, Dad. It’s cool,” Terry and I assure him. We are already tiptoeing around him, trying not to impose, and this is just another brick in the wall between us. We take it in stride. We know Dad will get better. It will just take time.
Class is as crowded as it was the day before, and I recognize no one. It’s early, I tell myself, and I try to fit in the best I can. I smile at some of the students who look as lost as I feel, but I get a cold response and decide to back off. I can already see some cliques form between kids who obviously know each other from the year before. They are almost all blonde, tan, and beautiful. These must be the jocks, I deduce, feeling a twinge of sadness when I remember how I tried out to be a cheerleader back in Carol City, before the gang fights got out of hand. That didn’t last long. Well, I guess it’s too late to get into that. The cold looks from the students still sting. I must not have the right look. So forget ‘em! I fling my head and put on my best tough armor as I pass students by, not allowing anyone a chance to smile.
After school, I head straight to Terry’s. She is in the kitchen standing in front of the open refrigerator door. I sneak up behind her. “Whatcha got there? More ‘Terry food’?”
“Ahh!” she screams, turns, and punches my arm. “Don’t do that!”
“Aha! You’re eating a Snickers. I knew it!”
“So…? And, yes, John was here and, yes, he brought more ‘Terry food.’ Jealous?”
“Not of that!” I try to coax her out of the kitchen, run to the living room, and leap on the water bed. Waves of water trapped under plastic roll me from side to side. I giggle and begin to tease, “Terry, where are you?” Quiet. “Terry!” Still no answer. “Okay, fine, I’m leaving.”
“No, no, wait.” Her words are muffled by a mouthful of peanuts and chocolate. “I’m coming. I was just starving, Dawn. I haven’t eaten all day.” She plops on the water bed with me, licking the chocolate from her fingers. “Dad wouldn’t answer the door today. I tried to knock. A bunch of times.”
“Why is he being like that?” I ask, suddenly solemn. “You think it’s ‘cause he don’t feel good?”
“Maybe. That’s part of it, but he told me that since I was with Juan he considers me on my own, and I need to take care of myself or let Juan take care of me.” She shrugs her shoulders. “I don’t like asking him for anything, Dawn. I only ask if I’m really desperate… and then mostly I feel too shy to even ask at all.”
We sit together in silence for a while, not really knowing what to think or say about Dad. “I just try to stay out of his way anymore too, Ter.”
“At least John brings me something to eat, even if it is candy and he calls it ‘Terry food.’” We laugh and tease-punch each other’s arms, quickly trading physical pain for the tearing ache in our hearts.
My mind switches gears. John, I remember, feeling my stomach tighten. He’s always around, isn’t he? I don’t want Terry to see the confusion inside me, to sense anything deeper than a casual observance. “Yeah, he seems like a nice guy.”
Her strong gaze catches my eye. “Oh, yeah. He wants to know if we want to go shooting in the mountains tomorrow after school.”
“Shooting! Who? Us? Guns? I don’t want to shoot anything!”
“That’s what I told him. He said target shooting, not shooting anything live.”
“Oh.” I mull it over for a minute. “Well, I do want to see the California mountains. We never saw any mountains in Florida; only hills. But I don’t know if I want to shoot, Terry. I’m kinda scared. What about sightseeing this weekend? What did Juan say?”
“Oh, the beach is still on for this weekend.” Terry half mumbles under her breath. “You couldn’t stop Juan from going if you tried.” She pauses. “I don’t know, Dawn. Do you really want to go into the mountains with this guy and his guns?”
“I think he’s okay, Terry. He’s been real nice to us since we’ve been here, and everyone knows there’s safety in numbers, right?” I don’t want to blow things out of proportion. Besides, I want to go, even if shooting scares me… and, well, I like being around John.
“Yeah. I guess. Juan can come with us too, for protection.” She rolls her eyes.
The next day I can hardly wait for school to get out. I keep my nose in my books and manage to robotically make it to my classes without any major problems, except checking the clock every five minutes. Knock it off, Dawn, I keep telling myself. Calm down. There’s nothing to get excited about. When the final bell rings, I race to gather up my things and head home double time. Hot and sweaty, I arrive at the cottages, my long hair clinging to my face, arms, and back. Terry and Juan look at their watches and shake their heads.