I waited on stage for Devlin to get us started and found Annabelle in the crowd. She was standing between Noah and Chelsea. There was a bright smile on her lips, but even from where I was standing with the lights shining down on me, I could see the tears in her beautiful blue eyes.
Putting it down to her being emotional for her brother, I winked at her, hoping to make her laugh. Her lips opened in a small laugh, but I couldn’t hear it over the noise of the crowd. I wanted to tell her right then and there that I loved her —that no matter what happened in the future, I would always love her.
Devlin counting us down for our first song of the night kept me from doing just that, and I turned off everything in my mind except for the music. I didn’t see the crowds while I played with my band. All I could hear, see, fucking feel, was the music that seemed to radiate out of me with the force of a tropical storm that was quickly turning into a hurricane.
Nothing in the world had ever felt as good as being on stage, sharing my love and need for my music. Nothing had ever gotten me as revved up, as high. Nothing could make me feel like a god more than my music…
No, that was wrong. Annabelle could do all of that with just her smile. All she had to do was look at me with those baby-blue eyes and I felt like I could conquer the world. She was my high. She was the goddess to my god. I might want the music, but I needed her more. If she asked me, I would throw down my bass right then and there and walk away from it for the rest of my life. I would give up anything and everything if she wanted me to.
Being a rock star didn’t seem as important when faced with the possibility of losing her forever, something I knew would happen if I stayed with OtherWorld. I would happily quit and follow her and Noah to Nashville, find a job working for the DOT there. And then, when she was old enough, I’d put my ring on her finger, put my baby in her belly.
Everything inside of me went simultaneously hot and cold. I wanted all of that, damn it. I wanted it and more, but I wasn’t good enough for Annabelle Cassidy. I didn’t want to destroy her life like that. She deserved so much more, someone better than the monster that was in my head. I couldn’t ruin her life by being selfish. I wouldn’t. She was too good, so special, to have to live the rest of her life with my fucked-up mess.
But I wanted to be selfish…
If you asked me how well the show went that night, I couldn’t have told you. My mind had shut down and I’d played on autopilot. I didn’t hear the screams for one more song, or see the reactions on my band-brothers’ faces as we left the stage and returned to the back room where more beers were already waiting on us.
Grabbing two, I swallowed one before my ass had even hit the loveseat and quickly tipped the other to my lips. Vaguely, I heard the others laughing and someone patting Axton on the back. From the groan I heard I was pretty sure it had been Wroth doing the patting. Someone sat beside me and I was surprised to see it was Liam. Usually he went off with Tawny right after our gigs, either to get some pussy or more drugs, I didn’t know. Didn’t care.
“You alright, man?”
I nearly laughed at my junky friend asking if I was alright. I bit back the laugh, though. I wasn’t sure how I could hold back the other emotions churning deep inside of my gut if I did.
Noah walking into the room with Chelsea and Annabelle, distracting me long enough to calm down. I held out my hand for her, wanting just a little more time with her. God, please. I won’t ask you for more, I swear. Just a few more days with her is all I want. When she moves to Nashville, I’ll let her go. Just give me a few more days.
Annabelle placed her hand in mine, but when I gave it a little tug, wanting her to sit down on my lap as she had before the show, she gave me a tight smile and shook her head. My brows lifted and my hand tightened around hers, ready to pull her down forcefully if I had to. She pulled her hand away and turned her head, looking at the door she’d just come through.
Curious, I followed her gaze only to find a man in his late thirties, dressed in an expensive suit, standing in the doorway. Noah stepped forward, shaking the man’s hand as if he knew him already.
“Glad you could make it, Rich.” Noah encouraged the other man to come in, grinning. “I told you that you wouldn’t be sorry if you came out. After that show I’m sure you will agree with me.”
“You got that right, boy.” Rich glanced from one of my band members to the next, only stopping for a few seconds on each of us, but I could see the excitement in his eyes when I met his gaze. “I like your sound. I think I can take your band far, if you’re willing to let me try.”
I shot a look at Noah, who was still grinning. He wrapped his arm around Chelsea’s shoulders and she kissed his cheek quickly before pulling away and went to hug Annabelle. I watched the girl I loved continue to wear her bright smile, but I was more than sure that she was blinking back tears as she let the smaller blonde hold her.
“Mind telling us what’s going on?” Wroth’s scary-ass voice brought my head around, turning my attention back to what was going on around us.
“When I was in Nashville last week, I told the radio exec about OtherWorld. He gave me Rich Branson’s number and told me to mention his name so Branson would take me seriously.” Noah shrugged his shoulders. “Once we found Axton to take over for me, I knew that you guys were ready, so I asked Rich to come out and listen tonight.”
“Rich Branson?” Axton repeated the name, a frown tightening his brow. “Aren’t you one of the top managers in California?”
The Branson guy was grinning even bigger now and even I could see the narcissism in this asshole. “That would be me. If you guys are willing to sign on with me, I can guarantee you a record label contract within the next year. Hell, within the next month if you boys aren’t scared of coming out to Cali with me.”
My heart stopped at his words. Holy shit. Here it was, my chance to go after the dreams I’d had almost my entire life. I had known it would happen one day, but now that the chance was staring me right in the face, I couldn’t breathe.
Branson continued, laying all the details out for us, and my heart still didn’t beat. We had a week to get our life in West Bridge in order before going to California. He’d send a bus for us, give us a taste of what life on the road touring would be like. Around me, the others were going crazy, laughing and slapping each other on the back. We’d made it. OtherWorld was going to be something special.
All I had to do was leave Annabelle behind.
The noises around me, added to those in my head, were making it hard to think straight. I jumped to my feet, grabbed hold of Annabelle’s arm and pulled her out of the room with me. The exit was just a few feet to the left and I dragged her outside with me.
The air was cool and I sucked in one lungful after another. My entire body was shaking and when I looked at Annabelle I realized that I must have been scaring her. She cupped my face in her soft hands. “What’s wrong?” she murmured soothingly.
“I…” I broke off, not sure what I was going to say. Shaking my head, I covered her hands and closed my eyes. “Things are just going too fast. I can’t slow it down. It’s too fast for me to wrap my head around and I need to make sense of it.”
I heard her breath hitch as she inhaled sharply and forced my eyes open. “I know,” she whispered. “It’s kind of scary. I’m kind of scared too. But I know this is what you’ve always wanted. Here’s your chance. Don’t let your fear of change take that away from you. You’re too good at what you do to let this slip through your fingers. OtherWorld is going to go places; you’re going to become the rock gods I’ve always known you would be.” Her arms wrapped around my neck and she buried her face in my neck. “I’m so proud of you, Z.”