“What?” Lilia asked, looking up.
Her friend’s face was taut with indecision and worry.
“What?” Lilia repeated.
Madie sighed and glanced around the class. She leaned even closer.
“People are starting to notice you hanging out with her. You must know what they’re saying.”
Lilia’s stomach swooped lower, a sensation that left her nauseated.
“What are they saying?” she forced herself to ask.
“That you and her …” Madie straightened suddenly as Indria spoke her name. Lilia listened as her friend answered the Healer’s question. The teacher gave Lilia a stern look, then turned away and resumed her lecture.
Lilia leaned closer to Madie.
“What are they saying?”
“Sh. I’ll tell you later.”
For the rest of the class Lilia found it twice as hard to concentrate as before. What could people possibly find to gossip about concerning her friendship with Naki? Was it the lowie/snootie thing? Did it have anything to do with Naki’s father? Naki had said he disapproved of lowies. Maybe he was threatening to stop Naki seeing Lilia.
By the time the University gong rang out, Lilia’s notes were a fragmented mess and her thoughts not much better. She followed Madie and Froje out of the classroom.
“Well?” she prompted.
The two girls exchanged looks. Madie’s expression was almost pleading. Froje’s was expectant. Madie turned to smile thinly at Lilia.
“We’d better do this before we join the boys.” She glanced around the hallway, then led Lilia and Froje into an empty classroom, checking to make sure there was nobody there. She turned to Lilia.
“It’s said … people say …” She paused and shook her head. “Naki doesn’t like boys.”
“Well, she likes them, but not in the way that girls are supposed to like them,” Froje injected.
“She likes girls.” Madie looked at Lilia, then away.
“In a way that girls are not supposed to.”
A strained silence followed. Lilia found that she was not surprised. She was certainly not as shocked as they expected her to be. As a servant, she had seen and heard many things that novices who had grown up in more sheltered homes didn’t know about. Her father had told her not to judge people too quickly.
Though they weren’t looking at her, expectation flowed from Lilia’s friends. As the silence lengthened, Lilia felt a rising panic. She should react, or they’d think she already knew.
And approved.
“Um,” she began.
“You know what we mean, don’t you. Girls who like girls in the way that boys—” Madie began.
“I know what you mean,” Lilia interrupted. She bit her lip. “Is it true? I mean, people make these things up all the time – especially about people who they resent for something. Like being beautiful and rich. Or for not being interested in them. Naki’s turned away a lot of boys – or so I’ve heard. That might make her just seem to like girls more.”
The two girls frowned and exchanged another look.
“I think so,” Madie said, though her tone held a hint of doubt.
“There’s a story that she and one of her servants were … you know,” Froje said, her voice hard with dislike. “But the servant wanted to end it. Naki found out. She set things up so her father would discover them together. He threw the servant and her entire family onto the street. My cousin knows the family. He swears it’s true.”
The pair looked at Lilia. She stared back at them. Her heart was quietly racing in her chest. She felt her friendship with Naki slipping away, and she didn’t like the feeling. The story about the servant was disturbing. Could Naki have been so malicious and vengeful? Maybe it’s an exaggeration, made up by servants angry at being thrown out – probably for a more deserving reason. She hated herself for thinking that, but she knew that not all servants were honest and loyal.
Maybe her friends were jealous of Lilia finding a prettier, richer friend than they were. Well, they shouldn’t have started completely ignoring me once they got their boys. But she couldn’t say that. It would make her liking Naki seem even more suspicious. Perhaps she could say something to help Naki. To help dispel the rumour.
“It doesn’t make sense,” she told them. “Naki doesn’t like her father. Why would she trust him to know that about her? More likely the servant was thrown out for another reason; made up a story to make Naki look bad.”
Froje and Madie looked thoughtful. They exchanged another look, this time doubtful. Then Madie smiled and turned to Lilia.
“Well, you’re probably right. You know her personally; we only know the stories.” She frowned. “But even if it’s not true, we are still worried about you. People are going to talk.”
Lilia shrugged. “Let them. They’ll get tired of it eventually. Why should Naki have no friends because of nasty rumour?”
She turned and started toward the door. The two girls hesitated, then Lilia heard them following. She also heard a fainter sound. A quick whisper.
“Why are you bothering? We’re not good enough for her now.”
Lilia continued out into the corridor, pretending she hadn’t heard, but she felt a bitter triumph. I’m right. They’re jealous. Yet she also had to hide a pang of guilt as the girls joined her. It was true. Naki was a more interesting and exciting friend than they had ever been, even when they weren’t distracted by the boys.
Especially if what they say about her is true.
She didn’t want to think about that now. Not because she feared the stories might be true, but because she feared that her friends would somehow sense the simmering excitement that their warning had stirred deep within her. And because of the inevitable questions the feeling led to.
What if it is true of me, as well?
All she knew for certain was that she did not feel the distaste she ought to, and that was something she would never be able to tell her friends – or anybody else. Perhaps not even Naki.
As the Guild’s carriage rolled through the streets of Arvice, Dannyl noted that Lady Merria was drinking in the sights with hungry eyes. Though she had only arrived ten days ago, she was already feeling the boredom of being stuck in the Guild House most of the time.
Or perhaps she is merely fascinated by a new place, Dannyl mused. It could be that I’m the only one feeling stuck.
Either way, she had been thrilled at the idea of visiting the market. Tayend had suggested it the previous night, before he’d headed off for another evening of fine food and company with one Ashaki or another. Dannyl hadn’t yet seen the market, since anything he required was always quickly brought to the Guild House by slaves, so the visit was merely for entertainment – and perhaps education, too. Maybe he’d learn something about Sachaka, and of the lands it traded with in the east.
“How did your visit with the women Achati recommended go?” Dannyl asked.
Merria glanced at him and smiled. “Good, I think. They all believe that the husband of one of the widows was killed by the Traitors, and yet only the widow displays any convincing hatred. I suspect that there’s more to it than they’re saying. One of the others hinted to me that she whined so much about him that the Traitors thought she was serious about wanting to be free of him.”
“So either the Traitors made a mistake, or she tricked them, or something else has forced her to claim to hate them to protect herself.”
Merria gave him a thoughtful look. “I really need to train myself to see all the complicated twisted possibilities in these situations, don’t I?”