“I’m just saying. I don’t want to see you hurt.”
“Are you concerned about me, or about another girl hurting Brian?” It was a low blow, and I knew my words were a slap in the face, but I didn’t need her to lecture me on how to live my life.
“Both,” she stated plainly. “I don’t want either of you hurt.”
“I’m having fun, Beth.” I already had a mother. I didn’t need another one.
“I can’t imagine this ending well. Hear me out, babe. I know him . . . the kind of guy he is, and I know you. I know you want the doctor and why you’re so damn set on having him—”
“Stop!” I didn’t need to hear anymore of her lecture. “I’m done with this conversation.”
I was about to press end on the phone, when her voice softened. “I love you, babe. We’re cousins, and we’ve been best friends since we were six. I know what you’ve been through.” Her voice dropped. “But . . . you never mention his name or what happened to anyone except me. So why did you . . . to Brian?”
I didn’t respond, because I didn’t have an answer. I wasn’t sure why I’d spilled my guts to him. Or part of my guts. He was doing something to me. Something about Brian chipped at my exterior, the one I’d been working so hard to keep up.
Maybe it was his happy-go-lucky demeanor, or his sweet concern for my wellbeing. Or maybe it was my need to connect to someone and not having a close friend in New York. Or maybe it was just him. Who knew?
Gulping down my inner thoughts, I told her, “I have to go.” Then I threw the phone on my bed and dropped my head in my hands.
I hadn’t signed up for this, all this chaos. I’d moved here to leave the craziness behind and move on. Why did everything seem to keep pulling me back to Bowlesville, to when I was seventeen?
Breathing in through my nose and slowly out my mouth, I let out an exaggerated sigh. After a moment, I pulled myself out of it and went to take a shower. Things with Brian would be fine. We could manage this FTF thing. Everything was going to be fine.
Right?
***
BRIAN
After work, I walked into the condo, dropped my laptop bag onto the hardwood floor, and went straight to the fridge. “Hey,” I said, acknowledging Trey, who was spread out on the couch. “Dude, don’t you work?”
The corner of his mouth lifted. “Daddy dearest is out of town on business, so I cut out early. You look beat, man. Hey, can you grab me one of those?”
I reached for two beers, tossed one to him, and plopped my ass on the couch next to him. “I finally got the Tiggins Corporation to agree to sit through a presentation.” As I lay my head back, I felt the tense muscles in my neck relaxing. Damn, this had been a long week. “Now it’s a matter of making them choose us over their current bank.”
He knocked my shoulder, hard. “Great job, man! That’s what you’ve been banking on. We gotta celebrate.”
I would’ve been more excited if I wasn’t exhausted. My usual A-game had been a bit off in the boardroom today. I couldn’t help it, though. My mind was preoccupied with more than work, running rampant from my night at Kendy’s and our strained conversation. I still wanted to question her, and so many times I’d had to bite my tongue to prevent myself from asking about her past. But she’d use her tempting sex appeal to change course. She was a fiend, addictive. Sex with her was raw, wild, and uninhibited. I wouldn’t have been dead tired if she hadn’t rushed me out of her bed at two a.m.
She blamed it on the FTF handbook and her god-awful rules. I didn’t understand what the deal was. If we had a mutual understanding about our relationship, why did it matter if I crashed at her place?
This morning, I had to press my snooze button twice. It took a while to wake up, even after a cold shower. My body was physically exhausted, plus the nerves from the morning meeting had worn me down. Still, I couldn’t get enough of her.
Physically, she tired me out, but hanging out with her, being in her presence, rejuvenated me.
I glanced at my watch. I hadn’t been home more than ten minutes, and I was already itching to see her again.
Trey took a swig of beer and rested his elbows on his knees. “Where are we going?” He had a smile on his face like he wanted to cause some trouble.
“I’m going to Kendy’s.” As soon as it slipped out, I regretted it.
“Oh boy. Getting some action tonight.” He lifted his fist, but I stared at his outstretched hand and left him hanging.
I raised an eyebrow, tired of his teasing, and moved my eyes to the television. Maybe Kendy and I were only friends that fucked, but I didn’t appreciate Trey joking about it.
“So you getting serious?” he prodded, fishing for more information.
I didn’t know what to tell him. All I knew was that I didn’t want it to end.
“No. It is what it is. A fling until she decides it’s over.”
He ducked his head into my line of sight and asked again, “You like this girl?”
“Me?” I shook my head in response. “Not in the way you’re thinking. We have a mutual agreement. That’s all.”
Besides, I needed to be focused. If I won this new deal, I’d make my quota for the year and could position myself for a promotion. It was the next big step on my radar.
“Hmm.” Trey tipped back his beer. “Mutual understanding . . .”
I didn’t appreciate his sarcasm. “Yes.” I gave him a look, telling him I didn’t need to be pestered any further.
Trey took another swig of his beer and stood. “Chill, man. I’m just playin’.” He slapped my back before moving toward his bedroom.
I ignored him, reached for my phone, and texted Kendy.
Me: Hey, still want me to come over?
Kendy: Lover boy!!!! But of course. Be here at 8.
I blinked a couple times at her text and rolled my shoulders back. The stiffness in my neck, which had started to dissipate a few minutes ago, was back. Mutual agreement or not, part of me felt like the appetizer, not the main course, a feeling I was familiar with.
I shook my head. This mutual relationship was my choice. I already knew what I was in for. In my prior relationship with Beth, she’d chosen the other man. I hadn’t previously been prepared for that. There was a difference.
I rubbed at my brow to ward off an oncoming headache. Before I contemplated what our relationship was any further, I placed my phone on the table and got ready for our next date.
ELEVEN
KENDY
The scent of coffee from my mug filtered through the air of my one bedroom apartment. There was nothing more refreshing than a fresh brewed cup of coffee.
“So, you wanted to talk?” I prompted, bringing the mug to my lips.
Sarah sat on the stool at my kitchen island, holding my Mickey Mouse mug as she blew at the steam rising from the cup. She had some important news to tell me about Dr. Klein, so of course I’d told her to come right over.
“I’m sorry. Super Cupid failed you. I just wanted to tell you this in person, since we’ve been on different shifts lately.” Her eyes dropped to my granite countertop, one of the many beautiful features which had drawn me to the place. “I’m working my magic on the other side, promise you. I’ve been dropping your name whenever he’s around.”
I rolled my eyes, thinking back to Saturday night when I had been dressed to impress, but had bedded the man I hadn’t been expecting to leave with. I didn’t know what more I could do. “Well, that night you got a stomach virus and left me without a wingman, the night you abandoned me . . .” I gave her a joking narrowed eye. “He left with another woman. If I wasn’t Kendall Lynn Miller, I’d be losing hope here, and be on the verge of giving up.” I didn’t need to mention that he’d left with another woman the next week too. Saying it out loud would only increase the blow.