understood her, he replied, «No, but I do understand your
husband.»
In another reported exchange he was asked if he would
marry.
«I have no intention to get married because it would only
cause me worries.»
«And why would that would be the case?»
«I would be jealous, because my wife would cheat on
me.»
«Why are you so sure of that?»
«Because I would deserve it.»
«Why is that?»
«Because I would have married.»
He also had sharp words to say about physicians, once
remarking that doctors have two different handwritings: a barely
legible one for prescriptions and a clear and proper one for their
bills.
A writer who visited the fifty–eight–year–old Schopenhauer
at lunch in 1846 described him thus:
Well built...invariably well dressed but an outmoded
cut...medium height with short silvery hair...amused and
exceedingly intelligent blue–flecked eyes...displayed an
introverted and, when he spoke, almost baroque nature,
whereby he daily supplied considerable material to the cheap
satire of...the table company. Thus, this often comically
disgruntled, but in fact harmless and good–naturedly gruff,
table companion became the butt of the jokes of insignificant
men who would regularly—though admittedly not ill–meaningly—make fun of him.
After lunch Schopenhauer habitually took a long walk, often
carrying on an audible monologue or a conversation with his dog
which elicited jeers from children. He spent evenings reading alone
in his rooms, never receiving visitors. There is no evidence of
romantic relationships during his years in Frankfurt, and in 1831,
at the age of forty–three, he wrote in «About Me,” «The risk of
living without work on a small income can be undertaken only in
celibacy.»
He never saw his mother after their break when he was
thirty–one, but twelve years later, in 1813, they began to exchange
a few business–related letters until her death in 1835. Once when
he was ill, his mother wrote a rare personal comment: «Two
months in your room without seeing a single person, that is not
good, my son, and saddens me. A man cannot and should not
isolate himself in that manner.»
Occasional letters passed back and forth between Arthur and
his sister, Adele, in which she again and again tried to move closer
to her brother, all the while offering reassurances that she would
never make demands on him. But he repeatedly backed away.
Adele, who never married, lived in great despair. When he told her
of moving from Berlin to escape cholera, she wrote back that she
would have welcomed getting the cholera which would have put an
end to her misery. But Arthur pulled away even farther, absolutely
refusing to be drawn into her life and her depression. After Arthur
left home, they saw each other only once, in 1840, in a brief and
unsatisfactory meeting, and Adele died nine years later.
Money was a continual source of concern throughout
Schopenhauer`s life. His mother left her small estate to Adele, and
Adele died with virtually no remaining estate. He tried, in vain, to
get a job as a translator, and until the very last years of his life his
books neither sold nor were reviewed by the press.
In short, Arthur lived without any of the comforts or rewards
that his culture held so necessary to equilibrium, even to survival.
How did he do it? What price did he pay? These, as we shall see,
were the secrets he confided to «About Me.»
32
_________________________
The monuments,
the ideas left
behind by
beings like me
are my greatest
pleasure in
life. Without
books I would
long ago have
been in
despair.
_________________________
Julius entered the group room the following week to an odd scene.
The members, sprawled in their seats, were intently studying
Philip`s parable. Stuart had placed his copy on a clipboard and
underlined as he read. Having forgotten his copy, Tony was
reading over Pam`s shoulder.
Rebecca, with a hint of exasperation in her voice, began the
meeting: «I`ve read this with due diligence.» She held up Philip`s
handout, then folded it and put it in her purse. «I`ve given it
enough time, Philip, in fact, too much time, and now I`d like you
to disclose the relevance of this text to me or the group or Julius.»
«I think it would be a richer exercise if the class discussed it
first,” responded Philip.
«Class? That`s what this feels like—a class assignment. Is
this the way you do counseling, Philip? she asked, snapping her
purse shut. «Like a teacher in a classroom? This is not why I`m
here; I came for treatment, not for adult education.»
Philip took no note of Rebecca`s huffiness. «At best there
exists only a vague boundary between education and therapy. The
Greeks—Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, the Stoics and Epicureans—all
believed that education and reason were the tools needed to combat
human suffering. Most philosophical counselors consider
education to be the foundation of therapy. Almost all ascribe to
Leibniz`s mottoCaritas sapientis meaning вЂwisdom and care.`”
Philip turned toward Tony. «Leibniz was a German philosopher of
the seventeenth century.»
«I`m finding this tedious and presumptuous,” said Pam.
«Under the guise of helping Julius, you»—she raised her voice an
octave—«Philip, I`m talking to you...” Philip, who had been
tranquilly staring upward, jerked upright and turned toward Pam.
«First, you pass out this sophomoric assignment and now try to
control the group by coyly withholding your interpretation of the
passage.»
«Here you go once again trying to de–ball Philip,” said Gill.
«For God sakes, Pam, he`s a professional counselor. You don`t
need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that he`ll try to contribute
to the group by drawing from his own expertise. Why begrudge
him everything?»
Pam opened her mouth to speak but closed it, seemingly at a
loss for words. She stared at Gill, who added: «You asked for
straight feedback, Pam. You got it. And no, I`ve not been drinking,
if that`s what you`re thinking. I`m in my fourteenth day of
sobriety—I`ve been meeting with Julius twice a week—he`s turned
on the heat, tightened the screws, and got me going to an AA
meeting every day, seven days a week, fourteen meetings in
fourteen days. I didn`t mention it last week because I wasn`t sure I
could stick it out.»
All the members, save Philip, reacted strongly with nods and
congratulations. Bonnie told him she was proud of him. Even Pam
managed a «good for you.» Tony said, «Maybe I should join you.»
He pointed to his bruised cheek. «My boozing leads to bruising.»
«Philip, how about you? You got a response to Gill?» asked
Julius.
Philip shook his head. «He`s already had a good bit of
support from others. He`s sober, speaking out, gaining strength.
Sometimes more support is less.»
«I like that motto of Leibnitz you cited,Caritas sapientis —
wisdom and care,” said Julius. «But I urge you not to forget
theвЂcaritas` part. If Gill deserves support,why should you always
be last in line? And, what`s more, you`ve got unique information:
who else but you can expressyour feelings about his coming to
your defense and confronting Pam on your behalf?»
«Well said,” responded Philip. «I have mixed feelings. I
liked Gill`s support, and at the same time I`m wary of liking it.
Rely on others to do battle for you, and your own musculature will