I wanted to kiss her but my lips are still cracked.
Why hasn’t my mother been to see me?
Second after Trinity
My mother has just left to catch the train for Sheffield. I am worn out with all the emotion. I am having a relapse.
Pandora went to see Bert Baxter. She said the nurses are getting fed up with him because he won’t stay in bed or do anything he is told to do. He is being discharged on Thursday.
I long for the peace and quiet of a hospital ward. I would be a perfect patient.
Pandora’s father has put Sabre into kennels, it iscosting him three pounds a day, but Pandora’s father says that it is worth every penny.
I am entering a period of convalescence. I will have to take things very easily if I am to regain my former vigour.
Summer 1981
Dominion Day, Canada. New Moon
The truant officer came round this afternoon; he caught me sitting in a deckchair in the front garden. He didn’t believe I was ill! He is reporting me to the school! The fact that I was sipping Lucozade whilst wearing pyjamas, dressing gown and slippers seemed to have escaped him. I offered to show him my yukky tonsils but he backed away and trod on the dog’s paw. The dog has got a low pain threshold so it went a bit berserk. My father came out and separated them but things could get nasty for us.
The doctor said I can go back to school tomorrow, depending on how I feel. You can depend that I won’t feel up to it.
A brown-skinned family are moving into Mr Lucas’s old house! I sat in my deckchair and had a good view of their furniture being carried out of the removal van. The brown-skinned ladies kept taking massive cooking pots into the house so it looks as if they are a large family. My father said that it was ‘the beginning of the end of our street’. Pandora is in the Anti-Nazi League. She said she thinks that my father is a possible racist.
I am reading Uncle Tom’s Cabin.
Independence Day, USA
The street is full of brown-skinned people arriving or departing in cars, vans and mini-buses. They keep trooping in and out of Mr Lucas’s old house. My father says they have probably got three families to each room.
Pandora and I are going round to welcome them to our district. We are determined to show that not all white people are racist fanatics.
Bert Baxter is still in hospital.
Third after Trinity
Stayed in bed until 6 PM. There was no point in getting up. Pandora has gone to a gymkhana.
Mrs O’Leary is trying to organize a street party for the Royal Wedding. The only people to put their names down so far are the Singh family.
Bert Baxter has escaped from hospital. He telephoned the National Council for Civil Liberties and they told him he could sign himself out, so he did. He is in our spare room. My father is going up the wall.
Pandora, Bert and I have put our names down for the street party. Bert is looking much better now that he can smoke as many Woodbines as he likes.
Pandora’s father has been round to talk to my father about what to do about Bert and Sabre. They both got drunk and started arguing about politics. Bert banged on the floor and asked them to keep their voices down.
My father is near to despair because of Bert’s snoring. It doesn’t bother me, I put Blu-tack in my ears.
Went to school today. I have decided to take Domestic Science, Art, Woodwork and English O levels. I am doing Geography, Maths and History for CSE.
Pandora is taking nine O levels. But she has had more advantages than me. She has been a member of the library since she was three.
School breaks up for eight weeks tomorrow. Pandora is going to Tunisia soon. How I will survive without my love is anybody’s guess. We have tried French kissing but neither of us liked it, so we have gone back to the English.
My skin is dead good. I think it must be a combination of being in love and Lucozade.
It was magic at school today. All the teachers were in good moods. A rumour went round that pop-eyed Scruton was seen laughing but I didn’t believe it myself. Barry Kent climbed up the flagpole and flew a pair of his mother’s knickers in the breeze. Pandora said it was probably the first airing they had had for years.
Scan O’Leary is nineteen today. He has invited me to his birthday party. It is only over the road so I won’t have far to go.
I am writing up my diary now just in case I have one too many. People seem to get drunk just stepping over the O’Learys’ threshold.
First proper hangover. Aged fourteen years, five months and nine days. Pandora put me to bed. She gave me a fireman’s lift up the stairs.
Fourth after Trinity
My father took me, Pandora and Bert to the Wagtails boarding kennels this morning. Mrs Kane, the proprietor, has refused to keep Sabre any longer. It was very touching to see Bert and Sabre reunited. Mrs Kane is a hard woman, she got very nasty when my father refused to pay Sabre’s boarding fees, she kept smoothing her black moustache with her horny fingers and using unladylike language.
Bert said he won’t be parted from Sabre again. He said that Sabre is his only friend in the world! After all I have done for him!! If it wasn’t for me he wouldbe a corpse by now, and Sabre would be an orphan living with the RSPCA.
Bert has been talking to Mrs Singh! He speaks fluent Hindi! He says she has found some indecent magazines under the lino in the bathroom. An heirloom from that creep Lucas!
Mr Singh is outraged. He has written to the estate agents to complain that his house has been defiled.
Bert showed me one of the magazines. They are not indecent in my opinion, but then I am a man of the world. I have put it under my mattress with the Big and Bouncys. It is called Amateur Photographer.
Bert’s social worker came round tonight. She is called Katie Bell. She talked to Bert in a stupid way. She said that Bert had been offered a place in the Alderman Cooper Sunshine Home. Bert told her that he didn’t want to go. Katie Bell said that he has got to go. Even my father said that he felt sorry for Bert. But not sorry enough to invite Bert to live with us permanently I noticed!
Poor Bert, what will happen to him?
Bert has moved in with the Singhs. Mr Singh fetched Sabre’s kennel so it is official. Bert looks dead happy. His favourite food is curry.
Pandora has allowed me to touch her bust. I promised not to tell anyone, but there was nothing to tell really. I couldn’t tell where her bust began through all the layers of underclothes, dress, cardigan and anorak.
I am reading Sex, The Facts, by Dr A.P.G. Haig.