* * *
Once underwater recovery was packed and gone, Caroline’s friends and their parents started making their way home. No one talked. There was nothing left to say.
Sheriff Borg tipped his hat at Caroline and her mother, pausing a long time to look over her mother’s bruised face.
“It’s a long story,” her mother told him. “But you’ll have to ask Dee Dee if you want to hear it. I’m sure she’ll be happy to tell you all about it.”
The sheriff continued staring at her mother as though he had more to say, but maybe under the circumstances he decided it could wait because he said, “Fair enough,” and walked away. He stopped to talk with Chris’s mother, Dee Dee. Chris and Johnny were with her. Caroline had just noticed they had been watching from the pier. Caroline couldn’t help but think Johnny was with his new family, and it was her fault.
Her mother looked at the group on the pier, and Caroline wondered if she were thinking the same thing, if she blamed Caroline.
“I’m heading home,” her mother said. “Are you coming?”
“In a minute.”
Once her mother walked away, Johnny headed in Caroline’s direction. He bumped her shoulder and motioned toward the south end of the lake. “You did good,” he said.
She shrugged. “It was Cougar who found her.”
“Yeah, but you’re the one who brought the dog with you.”
“I suppose.” She paused and looked in the direction where the sheriff and Dee Dee were talking. She glanced back at Johnny. “I’m real sorry about what I did to you.” It was the only other thing she could think to say.
“Forget about it,” he said. “It’s not your fault.”
He was right. She was twelve years old and couldn’t be held responsible for her parents’ lies.
“It’s funny,” he said. “But I’m not really mad. I mean, it’s messed up finding out Kevin’s not my real dad, but it kind of makes sense. Now I know why things were always weird between him and me, you know?”
She nodded.
Johnny nudged her shoulder again. “I’m staying with Chris and his mom until the end of the summer. At least until I figure things out.” He shrugged. “I wanted you to know.”
Caroline looked at the ground and forced out the word okay.
“You’re still my little sister, you know.”
“Half-sister,” she said.
“Technically, true.” He wrapped an arm around her. “I’m still going to pick on you.”
“Great.”
He laughed and dropped his arm. “Well, I guess I’ll see you around the watering hole.” He started walking away.
“Hey, Johnny,” she called.
He turned around.
“No halfsies,” she said. “Brother and sister.”
“You got it,” he said and smiled his crazy silly smile that could break a million girls’ hearts.
* * *
Gram was pulling out the last of the boxes in the back closet off the screened-in porch. She told Caroline she was determined to get through all the old junk and be done with it. She had been directing Caroline’s mother all morning: Pick up this box and set it out for the trash, carry this one to the car to donate, try not to break anything in this box and put it in the hall closet.
Her mother didn’t complain and did what Gram had asked her to do. However, Caroline noticed every move her mother made was done with slow, careful steps, as though she were recovering from a bad fall. There were bruises on her mother’s body to match the shiner on her face. Despite looking beat-up, her mother seemed, oh, Caroline didn’t know, better somehow. There was something different about her, something Caroline struggled to name, but she didn’t put much effort into it anyhow. She no longer felt as though it was her responsibility to figure her mother out. She learned maybe it was better to leave some things alone.
“I can help,” Caroline said to Gram when she dropped another box onto the floor outside Caroline’s bedroom door.
“No, you should be outside,” Gram said. “Go on and have fun. You shouldn’t be hanging around inside, not on a day like today.”
When Gram left to get another box, Caroline closed her bedroom door, climbed out the window, and crawled into the arms of the willow tree. Her mother continued carrying boxes in and out of the cabin. She listened to the door creak open and bang closed. Every now and again Gram would call to have her mother lift something heavy.
Her father’s truck was gone. He had told her late last night when she had returned to the cabin that he’d be on the road for awhile, and he had no idea when he would return. Something about the way he said it made her sad, although he assured her it had nothing to do with her or the fact that Johnny wasn’t his. She didn’t believe him nor did she try to stop him from leaving.
There was more stomping coming from the screened-in porch, and then the door slammed for the last time. Maybe her mother decided she had had enough and was taking off too.
“Caroline,” her mother called. “Are you out here?”
“Over here,” she said, and hopped down from her hiding spot. She moved the long sweeping branches aside and emerged from under the tree where her mother stood waiting on the other side.
“I’m going for a drive,” her mother said.
Of course you are, Caroline thought, but didn’t say. She only nodded.
Her mother hesitated, as if she was deciding whether or not to say whatever else was on her mind. In another second she asked, “Do you want to come with me?”
The question surprised Caroline. Her mother had never asked her to come along before. A week ago she would’ve jumped at the chance to be with her. But now?
Now, Caroline decided, she didn’t need to be.
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
Jo felt as though she was seeing her daughter for the first time in a long time. There was something new about her, a maturity she hadn’t seen before.
“Come on, come for a drive with me,” she said. “I can’t promise the radio station will play anything good, but I doubt the jukebox in the Pavilion is any better.”
A hint of a smile touched the corners of Caroline’s lips. “You’re right about the jukebox,” she said. “But I’m heading to the lake for the fishing tournament.”
“Did you enter?”
“Not this year. I promised Adam I’d go and cheer him on.”
“Oh,” she said, somewhat surprised by her disappointment that her daughter had other plans. After all, she hadn’t intended on asking her to come along. It was something that occurred to her at the last minute, that it was time to have the conversation she had been putting off. But nonetheless she said, “Well, if you promised Adam.”
“I did promise.” Caroline grabbed her bike from the yard.
It felt as though their roles had reversed overnight, and it was Jo begging with her eyes for her daughter to stick around.
“See you,” Caroline said in a nonchalant way.
“Hey, Caroline.”
Caroline stopped pushing her bike and looked over her shoulder.
“I’m coming back. You know that, don’t you?”
“Yeah, Mom, I know.”
“Do you?”
Caroline studied her, and Jo wondered what she saw: a mother who had lied to her, who had often run away for reasons Caroline had never understood. The longer her daughter stared at her, the more the guilt pressed down on Jo’s heart.
“I guess,” Caroline said finally. “I mean, I didn’t always know if you would come back or not.”
“I know. And I’m sorry about that.” She walked closer to her, hoping she wouldn’t jump on the bike and ride away. Although she supposed she couldn’t blame her if she did. “I’m sorry about a lot of things.”