Grand’mere sat back and lifted her glass. “To the future,” she said. And I felt that the pair of them had sealed a pact.
We were all rather thoughtful on the way home and when we were in bed that night, Grand’mere said: “What a delightful young man Philip has grown into.”
“He is always gentle and kind.”
”So different from his brother. It is strange how people differ. Some say it is in their upbringing, but those two boys have been brought up together … and see what a difference.”
“Yes,” I said, thinking of Charles in the mausoleum.
“I believe he is fond of you. I mean … I know he is fond of you. What he said this evening …”
“What did he say … only that he was glad I was not one of the family.”
“You know what he meant. He is in love with you. He is waiting to say so only because you are so young. Perhaps in a year … you’ll be just on seventeen and …”
I laughed. “Oh, Grand’mere, you are romancing. Do you want so much to get me off your hands?”
“More than anything in the world 1 want your happiness. 1 want you to be cherished and loved. That is what I want … before I go.”
“I wish you would not talk about going.”
“I do not intend to go for a long time, but one must be practical. Look at Sir Francis … well one day and struck down the next. Oh, he has recovered they say, but he will never be the man he was. I should be so happy if I saw that everything was settled for you. Philip has always been fond of you. I have always known that he was the one. He has that wonderful enthusiasm for his business. He would be dedicated to his work, to his wife and his family.”
“Grand’mere, I feel you are making a situation to fit what you want.”
She shook her head. “Tonight he showed his feelings clearly. It was almost a proposal.”
“I did not see it as such. I think he was just trying to be kind because he thought I felt left out of this presentation business.”
“No. No. I am a happy woman tonight. I see the way ahead.”
“Well, Grand’mere, I am glad you are happy.”
“Good night, my child, and may the good God bless you.”
I lay awake thinking about what she had said. I tried to recall every moment of that visit to the Crown and Sceptre. What had Philip said that was so revealing? I knew that he liked me. He had always been kind and friendly and I had looked upon him and Cassie as my best friends in the house.
Had there really been something significant about that conversation—or had Grand’mere tried to fit it into her dreams? I suspected her of that now and then.
And myself … married to Philip! Most girls think of marrying when they get into their teens. They dream of knights and heroes of romance. St. George … No, nobody wanted a saint. Sir Lancelot was more eligible. He had been a sinner but a great lover. Loving recklessly was more attractive than slaying dragons. People like Nelson … Drake …
Drake, of course. There had been something exciting about him. Julia had recognized it. What if it had been Drake who had said what Philip did at the table in the Crown and Sceptre? What should I be feeling now?
Quite excited. Well, I was excited now, for it was exciting to be loved … if that was what Philip had meant by those cryptic words.
The days passed quickly. Charles and Philip left for France, for Sir Francis had recovered sufficiently to resume his normal life; and Grand’mere with Julia and myself returned to The Silk House.
Lady Sallonger greeted me rather peevishly telling me that she had had a very bad time. Miss Logan’s voice tired quickly, and Cassie did not put the same expression into the words as I did. We had remained away longer than we had said we would. She had all the anxiety of worrying about Sir Francis.
“If I could go to London and look after him I would be happy to do so,” she said. “But here I am … a poor invalid unable to move from my couch … and everyone deserting me. No one seems to realize that I cannot move about. 1 am quite chilled. Ring the bell for them to put some more coal on the fire and is that window open? Well, please close it and bring me my red rug … I cannot endure this blue one… . Oh, the fire, Henry … The red rug, Lenore … that blue one is so scratchy … and my skin is so delicate. See if you can find something to read to me.”
So it went on. Grand’mere was right in saying that Lady Sal-longer was getting more demanding than ever. She commanded that I be in attendance whenever I was not in the schoolroom.
I did manage to get to Grand’mere’s room. I told Lady Sal-longer that 1 was needed to help with Julia’s clothes. The one thing which we had managed to impress on Lady Sallonger was the importance of Julia’s coming out. She herself had “come out” so she knew all about it, although it was, of course, a much more demanding matter in those days when the Prince Consort was alive. Then things had been conducted with far more decorum. She had come out and been the success of the season. The offers she had had … !
I found her description of the London scene in her days more entertaining than sitting listening to her continual demands, so I encouraged her to speak of it and I learned what it meant to be a young girl in her days; and she grew quite animated remembering.
“There were afternoon parties where everyone was in full evening dress. Drawing Rooms, they called them. They had left those horrid little dark apartments in St. James’s Palace and were held in the Throne Boom at Buckingham Palace. We were selected with the greatest care in those days. Such a time it was … learning to curtsy and how to walk backwards. It was a nightmare … particularly with a train of about three or four yards in length. Those plumes and veils! And being stuffed into your corsets! It was agony for some of the girls. Of course I had a naturally slender waist. And all for a few minutes of being presented to Her Majesty. Oh dear, what days they were! And Sir Francis swept me off my feet before I had a chance with anyone else. I am sure I should have married a duke if I had not been caught up so quickly. How we danced in those days! My foot is going to sleep. Do massage it, Lenore.”
So we were back to the familiar, and dreams of past glories faded.
But I did manage to spend some time with Grand’mere. Emmeline was constantly clothed in the most expensive garments. Cassie, who was often with us, was very fond of Emmeline. She made up stories and was sure that, when it was dark, the three dummies came to life and talked about the triumphs they had enjoyed before they were turned into dummies by some wicked witch. She was sure Emmeline smiled inwardly when she was swathed in blue silk.
Julia was happier now. She was back at home. She enjoyed the dancing lessons in which I always had to take part as the gentleman, which I enjoyed very much too. Cassie used to sit watching us, applauding. But I loved best being in the sewing room, taking a turn at Grand’mere’s machine, feeling the softness of the silken materials and wishing they were being made for me.
Mia was getting fatter. I think anxiety made her eat even more than normal. I wondered what the Countess would say when she saw what weight Julia was putting on. Grand’mere was concerned that the dresses might not fit when the time came to wear them.
In due course Easter was with us and Julia was delivered by Miss Everton into the hands of the Countess and the real process had begun.
The workroom was very quiet. Cassie said Emmeline was sulking. Grand’mere made two dresses—one for Cassie and one for me—out of the material left over from Julia’s needs. We called them our coming out dresses.
August came and the season was drawing to an end. No dukes, viscounts, baronets or even a simple knight had asked for Julia’s hand. She was to come down to Epping for a few weeks’ rest after her strenuous time, and then she would go up to London again, and under the excellent guidance of the Countess of Bal-lader make a fresh onslaught onto London society.