I was glimpsing now what all the matter was. Helena Justina was brave enough not only to have brought her restlessness upon herself, but also to see how badly her present sense of despair affected her soul. Quite possibly the better life she was striving for did not even exist.
I wanted to reach out to squeeze her hand, but she was not that sort of woman. Perhaps that was how her husband had felt about her too.
She decided to tell me. I waited to be startled, for nothing she ever said was conventional. She began to speak, in a cautious tone; I listened gravely. Helena explained what had led to her divorce.
And as she told me, my mind returned in stunned disbelief to the silver pigs.
XXXIV
"In the Year of the Four Emperors," Helena began, "my family father, Uncle Gaius, me supported Vespasian. Uncle Gaius had known him for years. We all admired the man. My husband had no strong views. He was a trader Arabian spices, ivory, Indian porphyry, pearls. One day, some people at our house were talking about Vespasian's second son, Domitian. It was when he tried to involve himself in the German revolt, just before Vespasian came home. They convinced themselves this callow youth would make an ideal Emperor attractive enough to be popular, yet easy for them to manipulate. I was furious! When they left, I tackled my husband She hesitated. I squinted at her sideways, deciding it was best not to interrupt. In the twilight her eyes had become the colour of old honey the last dark scrape that lurks just out of reach of your finger in the bottom corners of the pot so you cannot bear to throw it away.
"Oh, Didius Falco, what can I say? This quarrel was not the end of our marriage, but it made me see the distance between us. He would not admit me to his confidence; I could not support him as I should. Worst of all, he would never even listen to my point of view!" A wild Cretan bull would not have made me declare the man feared she was right.
"On spices and porphyry he must have been well set up," I suggested. "You could have led a quiet life, no interference"
"So I could!" she agreed angrily. Some women would have thought themselves fortunate, taken a lover, taken several, complained to their mothers while they spent their husbands' cash. Reluctantly, I admired her single-mindedness.
"Why did he marry you?"
"Public life a wife was compulsory. And choosing me tied him to Uncle Publius."
"Did your father approve of him?"
"You know families. The undertow of pressure, built up over years. My father has a habit of doing what his brother wants. Anyway, my husband looked a perfectly normal man: overdeveloped sense of self-interest, undernourished sense of fun"
Not a lot a man could say! To calm her I asked a practical question: "I thought senators were not allowed to engage in trade?"
That was why he went into partnership with Uncle Publius. He provided the investment, all the documents were in my uncle's name."
"So your man was rich?"
"His father was. Though they suffered in the Year of the Four Emperors"
"What happened then?"
Ts this an interrogation, Falco?" Quite suddenly she laughed. It was the first time I heard that twist of private amusement, an unexpectedly appealing note that made me inadvertently giggle in return. "Oh well! When Vespasian announced his claim and blockaded the corn supplies at Alexandria to put pressure on the senate to support him, there were difficulties trading east. My husband and my uncle tried to explore new European markets Uncle Publius even visited Britain to investigate tribal exports from the Celts! Uncle Gaius was not altogether pleased," Helena added.
"Why not?"
They don't get on."
"Why not?"
"Different types."
"What does Aelia Camilla think? Did she side with her husband or her brother Publius?"
"Oh, she has a very soft spot for Uncle Publius for the same reasons he irritates Uncle Gaius."
Her ladyship was still amused. She had the kind of laugh I wanted to hear again. I nudged at it: "What's so funny? What reasons?"
"I won't say. Well, don't mock… Years ago when they lived in Bithynia, when my aunt was a child, Uncle Publius taught her to drive his racing chariot!" I could not imagine it. Aelia Camilla had appeared so dignified. "You know Uncle Gaius the nicest kind of man, often adventurous, but he can be rather staid." I had guessed. "Uncle Gaius complains that Aunt Aelia drives too fasti I'm afraid she taught me," Helena confessed.
I leaned back my head and sombrely tutted at the sky. "My good friend your uncle is quite right!"
"Didius Falco, don't be ungrateful. You were so desperately ill I had to hurry you were perfectly safe!"
Out of character, she raised her arm and pretended to box me round the ears. I blocked the movement, casually catching her wrist. Then I stopped.
I turned Helena Justina's hand palm upwards and wrinkled my nose, breathing in the perfume I had noticed. She had a firm wrist, bare of jewellery tonight. Her hands were cold, like mine, but the scent hummed something like cinnamon but much more deeply resonant. Made me think of Parthian kings.
"Now there's an exotic attar!"
"Malabathron," she told me, wriggling, but not much. "From India. An immensely expensive relic of my husband"
"Generous!"
"Waste of money. The fool never noticed it."
"Perhaps," I teased, "he had a cold he couldn't shift."
"For four years?"
We were both laughing. I would have to let her go. No opportunity appearing, I bent my head and enjoyed another sniff.
"Malabathron! Lovely. My favourite! Does it come from the gods?"
"No, it comes from a tree." I could feel her growing anxious, but she was too proud to tell me to let go.
"Four years, so you were a bride at what nineteen?"
"Eighteen. Quite old. Like my husband's cold difficult to shift!"
"Oh I doubt that!" I commented gallantly.
When they favour me with their stories, I always give them my advice. "You should laugh at him more."
"Perhaps I should laugh at myself."
Only a maniac would have tried to kiss her hand. I replaced it like a gentleman in Helena Justina's lap.
Thank you," I said quietly, in a changed voice.
"What's that for?"
"Something you once did."
We sat quietly. I leaned back, stretching my leg and folding one hand over my sorely aching ribs. I wondered what she was like, before the rich fool with the snuffle made Helena so venomous to other people and so wretched with herself.
While I was wondering, the evening star materialized among high rags of racing cloud. The noises from the inn behind us had become more subdued as the clientele told dirty stories in twelve languages during the lull between simple gluttony and drinking themselves sick. Carp in the pond broke surface with a greater urgency. It was a good time for thinking, here at the end of a long journey with nothing to do but wait for our boat. Here in a garden. Here, speaking to a sensible woman with whom a man who took a little trouble could so easily exchange thoughts.
"Mars Ultor, I came so close… I just wish I had managed to find how those ingots are shipped out!"
Fretting aloud. Hardly expecting answers.
"Falco," Helena began carefully. "You know I went to the coast. The day I came back angry"
I chuckled. "A day, like any other day!"
"Listen! There was something I never told you. They were loading shale. Lopsided pantry goods -beakers, bowls, candlesticks, smirking sea lion table legs. It's hideous stuff. Goodness knows who would ever buy it. It needs to be oiled or it crumbles away…"
I squirmed guiltily, remembering the tray I had given to my mother. "Oh lady! Something like that could be their cover. Did you think to ask"