This was not for me, not alone. But it was oh so tempting! Maybe I could do it if I took Angelina with me. But then we would of course have to bring the boys too. And naturally Professor Coypu would like the idea—as would our boss Inskipp. It would get to be mighty crowded inside the sphere.
If it was hard to walk away, it was even incredibly harder to get out of the thing. I don't know how long I stood in the exit. I couldn't force myself to step forward and leave, it took every iota of willpower I possessed to just shift my weight, to lean forward, off balance. I fell, automatically did a shoulder roll down the stairs and out Onto the grass. I lay unmoving for quite a time. Finally sighed and climbed to my feet. Slakey was standing at the entrance above.
"I must say that you make a very good offer, Professor."
"I do. And you will of course accept." "Let's go sit by the bomb and discuss it."
I didn't really care about the bomb; I just wanted to be as far away from the lure of eternity as I could get.
"Let's talk offers," I said patting the bomb. He nodded stiffly. "I am saying no to your offer. Thanks a lot but no thanks."
"Inconceivable!" he spluttered.
"For you—but not for me. Thousands must have died because of you and your obsessive desire to hold onto your single miserable life. If I could snuff it out at this moment I would. In all of its multiple aspects. I wish I had the guts to trigger this bomb—but I value my own life too much. I have a lot to live for—and I look forward to living a long and happy and rejuvenated life. Now we come to you."
I leaned over the bomb and pointed a judicial finger in his face. "Here is what you will do. You will mine no more coal. The miners will be restored to their loved ones. The two Berkks will be reunited. Buboe will be turned over to the shrinks. The cyclotron will cycle no more. The women of the tables will work no more. They will get a good wash and return to their homes and—their loved ones as well. This operation is closed down."
"I won't be—"
"Oh yes you will. The reconstruction of Paradise will stop and the building crews will be paid off. The mead will be swilled no more in Valhalla. You have no choice. You will also close ~down all your religious operations on every one of the planets and all of your personas will return here. When you are assembled in all your strength you will remain here. Forever."
"You cannot do that!" he screamed.
"It has just been done."
"How can I trust you?"
"You have no other choice."
"You will set off the bomb."
"Only if you force us to. You see that is our mutual guarantee. We can never be sure that one of you is still not out there, ready to start this whole monstrous process again. The bomb is our guarantee that you won't do that. And we can't detonate it if we think that one of you is still out there. It is a paradox, a problem with no solution. A beginning with no end—like your reverse entropy. So you Sit and think about it, talk to yourself about it. Remember that this is the last, first and only offer that you are going to get."
I rose wearily and stretched.
"Get me out of here, Professor Coypu. It has been a very very long day"
Chapter 29
"There must be fifty slakeys at least," Angelina said, curling her lips in disgust. "All of them equally repulsive. Press the button, Professor, and set off the bomb. We will all sleep better at night." The three of us Sat staring into the permanent screen set up to monitor Slakey. Coypu looked very unhappy as he shook his head no.
"Too risky. All he needs is one of him out there on one of the thousands of planets in the millions of universes to get the whole process moving again." "We'll monitor, watch, be on our guard.. "I wish we could set off the bomb," I said with deep sorrow. "His death could never make up for the death and destruction he has caused—but it would sure help. But the professor is right. He may be mad but he's not stupid. If he did this all again he would not use the fake—religion ploy. He would do it in a more undetectable manner. Find another planet with a decent climate and resources of coal and set up another operation there. He would proceed slowly and carefully and untraceably—after all, he has all eternity to do it in. Ahh—there they go!"
A flicker of motion beside the unnildecnovum sphere showed where the Space Marines were springing into action. They had practiced the operation countless times in order to speed it up and perfect it. They got the time down to three seconds and that was all it took now. Two large marines slammed the heavy hydrogen bomb against the sphere, where it stuck. Captain Grissle hit the activating switch and then they all vanished as quickly as they had appeared. A viewscreen beside the professor lit up and Berkk's image appeared.
"In the green, Professor. Monitoring apparatus engaged and auto switch operating." "Thank you, very good." "Over and out."
His image twinkled and vanished and Coypu sighed with relief. "A good technician, Berkk. I'm glad he decided to accept a position with the Corps. Both of him. He helped me design the auto switch so that it is completely fail—safe."
"Am I missing something?" Angeina asked.
"Last night. I couldn't sleep and you were doing fine. I came here and found a very red—eyed Professor Coypu staring at the screen, worrying at the same worry that was worrying me. A what—if."
"Which what—if?"
"What if a Slakey is still out there somewhere. What if he builds a big enough interuniversal transporter to grab and transport that unhildecnovum sphere to another universe? The Slakeys would get away and start the whole deadly cycle over again. Between us we worked out a solution. We got a hydrogen bomb from stock, fixed it up with a molebind, a molecular binder that makes it part of the sphere."
"And," Coypu said, "it contains a detector. If the sphere does go somewhere it gets there as a mushroom cloud. If that thing goes away the bomb goes off."
"But if he doesn't try to move the sphere, why then he is still very much alive in his multiple bodies?" Angelina asked with irresistible female logic. "What do we do to get rid of this possibly eternal threat?"
The professor and I sighed a duet of sighs.
"We have experts working on other possibilities," I said. "We have prepared our dilemma as an abstract problem that will be presented on all of the tests given in every philosophy department in every university in the galaxy. Someone, somewhere, may come up with the answer. Meanwhile—all we can do is watch."
"Forever? Some legacy for our grandchildren. And theirs until the nth generation."
It was all too depressing to think of and I changed the subject.
"At least we have done something for Slakey's victims. The women from Purgatory, the ones who didn't need hospitalization that is, have all gone to the planets of their choice. With lifetime pensions—mostly paid for—by the seizure of Slakey's various properties. The same thing has been done for the miners—with the exception of one. Buboe is on the way to a hospital for the criminally insane, to see if he might be cured."
'What about those poor creatures in Hell'?" Angelina asked. "Can't anything be done for them?"
"A lot. Since they can't leave Hell we will have to do the best we can for them there. Interstellar charities have already put up temporary—and air—conditioned—buildings for them. Volunteers are giving them medical treatment, meals, outdoor barbecues, booze, counseling, that sort of thing. Since they can never leave Hell, permanent provision must be made for them. They should be self—supporting soon."
Angelina's eyebrows rose at that. "Self—supporting—in Hell?"
"There is no accounting for taste," I said. "A firm named Holidays in Hell has already been formed and the first tourists are happily on their way. They photograph the natives—for a fee. Grill steaks on the lava, shudder when the gravity waves grab them. Generally have a frightening but safe time."