She drove at a crawl past the house and down the front drive. Then, after weeks of agonizing and planning, she arrived at the point of no return.
In her gut, or wherever it was within the human psyche that one puts logic aside and blunders forward if for no other reason than inaction feels wrong, Jamie had found the courage to point the remote at the metal gate and press the button. Ghostly and silent in the darkness, the gate swung open.
She held her breath.
There were no spotlights. No alarm. No men racing toward the car.
“Maybe this is going to work,” she whispered to Ralph, who seemed as apprehensive as she was by this strange late-night outing.
With her heart pounding furiously, she drove through the open gate.
“Oh, my God,” she whispered. She was on the other side. She looked over her shoulder and watched the gate close. The front drive was empty.
So far so good.
Except it was starting to snow. Just a little, though. Just those isolated flurries the weatherman had mentioned. Not a cause for concern.
The tires crunched on the gravel as she turned north on Hartmann Road and drove ever so slowly, squinting into the darkness of the moonless night. She strained to make out the edge of the roadway, which she used as a guide. She wanted to be well past Hartmann City before she turned on the headlights.
The snow was coming down harder now. She replayed the forecast in her head. The snowstorm would be south of the interstate. She was certain of it. The ranch was more than twenty miles north of the interstate.
She would drive out of it soon. At least she hoped so. She’d never driven in snow before.
After she passed the Hartmann City turnoff, she turned on the headlights, which did little to help visibility. All she could see in front of her was swirling snow. She slowed to a crawl, continuing to use the edge of the road as her guide.
The swirling snow was hypnotic. She kept blinking her eyes and shaking her head to clear her vision. Surely the snow would let up soon. She just needed to keep going.
After what seemed like an eternity of tedious driving, she forced herself to relax a bit. All she had to do was inch along and stay on the road.
Then suddenly she saw something other than snow reflected in the headlights. What looked like a pair of glowing coals was floating a few feet above the road. It took her several seconds to understand what she was seeing. The eyes of a deer. She put her foot to the brake.
Only then did she realize how slippery the road had become. The car began to swerve out of control.
As she let up on the brake, she had a fleeting image of the deer leaping into the underbrush along the side of the road.
Somehow she managed to keep the car on the road. Then ever so carefully she slowed to a stop and buried her face in her hands. Why tonight of all nights did the TV meteorologist get the forecast wrong? This didn’t look like isolated flurries to her. She was in the middle of a damned blizzard!
Which made her think of the family that had frozen to death in their truck after being evicted by Gus Hartmann. The McGraf family. Had she already gone past what once had been their property?
She was looking around for some sort of landmark when she felt the beginning of a contraction.
It lasted only a short time and ended as quickly as it came. Another Braxton Hicks contraction. Not the beginning of labor.
She took several deep breaths and put her foot on the accelerator, and slowly-ever so slowly-the car began to move again. The snow was getting worse. No doubt about it. At the rate she was going, it would be a long time before she reached any sort of civilization. Maybe she should turn around and go back. Maybe no one had realized that she was gone. She could get back in bed and try again another night.
The road was narrow. If she turned around here, she would have to be careful not to slide off the road.
Already the snow was drifting against vegetation and blurring the edge of the roadway.
What if Montgomery had already discovered that she was gone? If she went back, Montgomery would have her locked up. In the tower with Mary Millicent. Or maybe in the cellar. She would never have another chance to escape.
She continued driving forward. Her speed barely registered on the speedometer. She leaned forward, peering over the steering wheel. She blinked her straining eyes and almost missed a curve in the road.
As she inched around the curve, another pain grabbed hold of her body. She lifted her foot from the accelerator, clutched the steering wheel, and waited for it to pass.
Not too bad, she told herself. Not the real thing. There was no reason for her to go into labor three weeks early. She was healthy and had had a normal pregnancy. Freda had said so. In fact, Freda had said she was amazingly healthy. Not a single sign of anything amiss. Her blood pressure was perfect. No sign of toxemia. The baby had a strong heartbeat.
She began to inch forward again. At this rate she would reach the Oklahoma Panhandle sometime next week.
But surely she would run out of the snow soon. Just keep going, she told herself.
She checked to make sure the windshield wipers were on the highest setting.
Her neck and shoulders hurt more than the pains in her belly. Jamie rolled her head around in an attempt to relieve the tension in her neck.
The road curved again, and she spotted something just ahead. A mailbox mounted on a fence post. A place where she could turn around-if that was what she decided to do. She slowed to a stop.
Then the muscles in her abdomen began to contract and another pain grabbed hold of her body. She clutched the steering wheel and willed the pain to pass. This one was harder than the other two and took longer to recede.
She turned off the motor and headlights, then waited in the darkness to see if there was another pain. Without the heater, the temperature in the car immediately began to drop. She reached in the backseat for a blanket and covered herself with it. Then she reached for Ralph and tucked him under it, too.
She stroked his head and prayed. No more pain. Please.
What the hell was she going to do if she was in labor? She would have to go back to the ranch. She had no choice. She would be risking the baby’s life if she didn’t.
What if God was on Amanda’s side?
With that discouraging thought, she began to moan. “I’m sorry, God, if I wasn’t supposed to do this, but I was afraid of what was going to happen to me afterward. And I don’t want Amanda to raise my baby. She might not do bad things herself, but I think she looks the other way and lets bad things happen. Please, if you’re mad at me, don’t take it out on the baby. He hasn’t done anything wrong. I want him to live. Please let him live,” she sobbed. But her sob turned into a gasp as another pain took hold of her body.
When it ended, she stared at her watch with its glowing dial, hoping to determine how much time passed in between pains. But when the next pain started, she forgot to check the time. She grabbed hold of the steering wheel and waited for it to end.
Then she forced herself to stare at the watch as she waited. Almost ten minutes passed before the now familiar pain began once again. And ten more minutes before the next pain. When that pain subsided, she actually felt calmer. She knew what the situation was and knew what she had to do. What she was experiencing was not false labor. Not Braxton Hicks. Snow was drifting against the windshield. The roads were becoming impassable. Pretty soon the car was going to be buried. Unless she found some sort of shelter, she and her baby and her dog were going to freeze to death.
Jamie turned on her headlights and squinted to make out the faded name on the mailbox. It was McGraf. There would be no help for her at the end of this lane, but at least she would be out of the weather.