Although he’s probably the last person I would normally ask for advice, Fenwick is here and the conversation reaches a lull.
“I have a hypothetical question for you,” I say, folding and unfolding my napkin. “If you had a patient who you suspected might have committed a serious crime, what would you do?”
Fenwick looks alarmed. He glances over his shoulder as if worried someone might have overheard.
“Do you have any evidence?” he whispers.
“Not really… more a gut instinct.”
“How serious a crime?”
“I don’t know. Perhaps the most serious.”
Fenwick leans forward and cups a hand over his mouth. He couldn’t be more conspicuous. “You must tell the police, old boy.”
“What about doctor-patient confidentiality? If patients don’t trust me, I can’t help them. It lies at the heart of everything I do.”
“It doesn’t apply. Remember the Tarasoff precedent.”
Tarasoff was a university student murdered by her ex-boyfriend in California in the late sixties. During a therapy session her boyfriend had told a university psychologist that he planned to kill her. The murdered girl’s parents sued the psychologist for negligence and won the case.
Fenwick is still talking, his nose twitching nervously. “You have a duty to divulge confidential information if a client communicates a plausible intention to do serious harm to a third party.”
“Exactly, but what if he’s made no threat against a specific person.”
“I don’t think that matters.”
“Yes it does. We have a duty to protect intended victims from harm, but only if the patient has communicated the threat of violence and actually identified someone.”
“You’re splitting hairs.”
“No I’m not.”
“So we leave a killer roaming the streets.”
“I don’t know if he’s a killer.”
“Shouldn’t you let the police decide?”
Maybe Fenwick is right, but what if I’m jumping to the wrong conclusion? Confidentiality is an integral part of clinical psychology. If I reveal details of my sessions with Bobby without his consent, I’m breaking about a dozen regulations. I could end up being disciplined by my association or facing a lawsuit.
How confident am I that Bobby is dangerous? He attacked the woman in the cab. His clothes smelled of chloroform. Other than that I have his psychotic ramblings about windmills and a girl in a red dress with scars on her arms.
Our food arrives and the conversation ebbs and flows over familiar territory. Fenwick tells me about his latest investments and holiday plans. I sense that he’s building up to something but can’t find an opening in the conversation that moves us smoothly onto the subject.
Finally over coffee he plunges in.
“There’s something I’d like to ask you, Joe. I’m not the sort of chap who usually asks for favors, but I have one to ask of you.”
My mind is automatically working out how to say no. I can’t think of a solitary reason why Fenwick might need my help.
Weighed down by the gravity of the request, he starts the same sentence several times. Eventually, he explains that he and Geraldine, his longtime girlfriend, have become engaged.
“Good for you! Congratulations!”
He raises his hand to interrupt me. “Yes, well, we’re getting married in June in West Sussex. Her father has an estate there. I wanted to ask you… well… what I wanted to say… I meant… I would be honored if you would acquiesce to being my best man.”
For a brief moment I’m worried I might laugh. I barely know Fenwick. We have worked in adjacent offices for two years, but apart from these occasional lunches we have never socialized or shared a round of golf or a game of tennis. I vaguely remember meeting Geraldine at an office Christmas party. Until then I had harbored suspicions that Fenwick might be a bachelor dandy of the old school.
“Surely there must be someone else…”
“Well, yes of course. I just thought… well, I just thought…” Fenwick is blinking rapidly, a picture of misery.
Then it dawns on me. For all his name-dropping, social climbing and overweening pride, Fenwick hasn’t any friends. Why else would he choose me to be his best man?
“Of course,” I say. “As long as you’re sure…”
Fenwick is so excited I think he’s going to embrace me. He reaches across the table and grasps my hand, shaking it furiously. His smile is so pitiful that I want to take him home like I might a stray dog.
On the walk back to the office he suggests all sorts of things we can do together, including arranging a stag night. “We could use some of your vouchers from your lectures,” he says sheepishly.
I am suddenly reminded of a lesson I learned on my first day at boarding school, aged eight. The very first child to introduce himself will be the one with the fewest friends. Fenwick is that boy.
15
Elisa opens the door wearing a Thai silk robe. Light spills from behind her, outlining her body beneath the fabric. I try to concentrate on her face, but my eyes betray me.
“Why are you so late? I thought you were coming hours ago.”
“Traffic.”
She sizes me up in the doorway, as if not quite sure whether to let me inside. Then she turns and I follow her down the hall, watching her hips slide beneath her robe.
Elisa lives in a converted printing factory in Ladbroke Grove, not far from the Grand Union Canal. Unpainted beams and timber joists crisscross each other in a sort of bonsai version of a Tudor cottage.
The place is full of old rugs and antique furniture that she had sent down from Yorkshire when her mother died. Her pride and joy is an Elizabethan love seat with elaborately carved arms and legs. A dozen china dolls, with delicately painted faces, sit demurely on the seat as if waiting for someone to ask them to dance.
She pours me a drink and settles onto the sofa, patting a spot beside her. She notices me pause and pulls a face.
“I thought something was wrong. Usually I get a kiss on the cheek.”
“I’m sorry.”
She laughs and crosses her legs. I feel something shred inside me.
“Christ, you look tense. What you need is a massage.”
She pulls me down and slides behind me, driving her fingers into the knotted muscles between my shoulder blades. Her legs are stretched out around me and I can feel the soft crinkle of her public hair against the small of my back.
“I shouldn’t have come.”
“Why did you?”
“I wanted to apologize. It was my fault. I started something that I shouldn’t have started.”
“OK.”
“You don’t mind?”
“You were a good fuck.”
“I don’t want you to see it like that.”
“What was it then?”
I contemplate this for a moment. “We had a brief encounter.”
She laughs. “It wasn’t that fucking romantic.”
My toes curl in embarrassment.
“So what happened?” she asks.
“I don’t think it was fair on you.”
“Or your wife?”
“Yes.”
“You never told me why you were so upset that night.”
I shrug. “I was just thinking about life and things.”
“Life?”
“And death.”
“Jesus, not another one.”
“What do you mean?”
“A married guy who reaches his forties and suddenly starts pondering what it all means? I used to get them all the time. Talkers! I should have charged them double. I’d be a rich woman.”