She sat the child on the draining board and made her a drink of orange juice. Rox gulped at it gratefully. She was a dear child, with beautiful blue eyes and thick curly hair. Maggie hugged her and rubbed her face in Rex's soft curls. If she ever had a child she hoped it would be just like this one, she was perfect.
She heard Freddie stirring a few minutes later, knew even at her young age that he was waiting for her to return to the front room. She stood in the freezing cold kitchen and cuddling the child to her she waited until she heard him stumble up the stairs to bed with her sister.
Maggie waited another ten minutes until she heard voices, and then she deemed it safe. She brought the child into the front room and settled her beside her so they were both comfortable. Rox wanted a story, and as Maggie spun her a yarn she could hear the bedsprings above her creaking.
She lay there for hours, and the dawn was breaking before she dared to close her eyes and sleep. It had been a close shave this time, but she was determined to best him. She always kept it to herself because of Jackie. Freddie used that knowledge and she lost a serious amount of respect from him because of it.
There was no one to confide in because it would cause too much trouble. Her father would cause a war, her mother would cause a bigger war and the family would be smashed apart in nanoseconds.
The worst of it all was she couldn't even tell her Jimmy. He idolised the man who in turns frightened and disgusted her on a daily basis.
She was almost fifteen years old and already her life was becoming a series of deceptions.
'What's the matter with your arms, Mags?'
Her mother's voice sounded worried. 'Has that fucking Jimmy been pushing you about?'
Her father was up and out of his chair in seconds. 'You what, Lena? What's wrong with her?'
Maggie pushed her mother away. 'For crying out loud, we was mucking about that's all, he don't know his own strength!'
Lena looked into her daughter's lovely face and saw the confusion there.
Maggie turned to her father. 'Tell her will you, Dad. Jimmy would never hurt me in a million years.'
'She's right, Lena, he worships her.' He picked up the Sun from the table and laughed as he said, 'He is a big lad for his age, be fair.'
He went back to his chair and his television, happy that his younger daughter was OK.
Lena wasn't so convinced. 'You ain't been yourself lately. Everything all right?' She nodded, pointing with her head towards her daughter's tummy. Realising what her mother thought, Maggie's eyes stretched to their utmost. 'Thanks a lot, Mum! I ain't like me sister, getting a belly full before I have even had a life.'
Lena knew by the scandalised tone in her daughter's voice that she was wrong about that much at least.
Jackie burst through the door, her eyes red rimmed from crying. 'He's gone.'
Lena rolled her eyes at the ceiling as she filled the kettle with water. 'What, he on the missing list again, then?'
Jackie was lighting a cigarette, and didn't even bother to answer her mother's question.
'The airing cupboard is full of puff and the stink is going right through the house. I'll fucking skin him when he finally turns up.'
She was opening a brown vial that contained her Dexedrine and swallowed them down without a drink of any kind. Almost immediately, she picked up the bread knife and started to cut herself a sandwich.
Lena took the bread knife off her and put the bread away. 'How can you eat on those things?'
Jackie laughed. 'They take a while to work, but I smoked a joint on me way over and now I have the munchies.'
Joe was almost catapulted from his chair then. 'You what? Drugs is it now, you dozy mare!'
Lena was trying to calm her husband down but he was roaring and swearing now in pure anger.
'Fucking Persian rugs now, not just the slimming pills, and the slimming injections. Oh no, she has to start smoking the Jamaican Woodbines.'
He pushed his face into his daughter's and bellowed, 'What about them poor kids of yours, eh? Bad enough they are lumbered with that useless ponce as a father, now they have to contend with you and all. He was higher than Halley's Comet last night in the pub with that skinny little Hutchins girl hanging off his arm…'
Maggie and Lena both closed their eyes in utter hopelessness at his words. As usual they had kept that gem of information to themselves.
'What, little Bethany Hutchins? But she's only a kid.'
Jackie felt a wave of humiliation wash over her. The girl was well known. Bethany's father, Alex Hutchins, and all her brothers were louts, drunks and thieves and Bethany was only seventeen. A young-looking seventeen, with high breasts and a shock of red hair. Her father would cause the Third World War over her and Freddie knew that.
He wouldn't?
She looked at her mother and mouthed the words out loud.
'He wouldn't.'
Lena sighed. 'He already has, love.'
Then she turned on her husband, who was quiet now, realising what he had just caused. 'You couldn't keep your trap shut, could you. Now look what you've done!'
Jackie snapped to life then. 'How long has this been going on, then?'
Maggie sighed audibly. 'A couple of days, that's all. He was drunk in the pub, you know what he's like.'
'But I'm pregnant!'
Jackie was silent once more, the shock had hit her at last and her secret was out. Her father started ranting again and Lena let him go because what he said was right.
'And you are still pumping those Dexies down your throat when you've got a child cooking inside you? Have you no fucking care for anyone or anything, girl?'
Jackie was wrong-footed now, but she was too angry to care. 'Everyone knows that stimulants can't hurt the baby-'
'That's an urban myth, Jackie, and you know it. You should be fucking ashamed of yourself.' Maggie's voice was hard and even Lena was taken aback at the disgust it held. 'Whatever he is or he ain't, you married him and you keep taking him back. No wonder he walks all over you and has no respect. He'll skin you alive if he thinks you've been taking pills while you are in the club and I for one won't blame him.'
Jackie turned on her little sister then, because the truth of the words hit her like a cold shower. 'Don't you fucking lecture me, madam. I know what you and Happy Harold get up to on my settee.'
For the first time ever Maggie wasn't frightened of the woman towering over her. Instead she was so angry she felt as if she could fight her own end if needs be.
She shouted into her sister's now shocked face. 'Oh shut the fuck up, Jackie, me and Jimmy are courting. You should be ashamed of yourself!'
'She ain't got no fucking shame. If she did she wouldn't be with him!'
Jackie turned on her father then.
The screaming was reaching crescendo when Maggie picked up her bag and coat and left the house. She was shaking with anger at the knowledge her sister would take any kind of drugs while carrying a child, even if the child was fathered by a piece of shit like Freddie Jackson. It was wrong, so very wrong. And if she stayed near Jackie she would not be responsible for her actions.
Outside she breathed in the cold air to try to calm herself down. Freddie had been home for eight months so Jackie could be a few months gone. She had always had a big stomach and since the last one it was even harder to tell, plus she still didn't stop eating even with all the pills she popped.
Maggie lit a cigarette and started to walk to her friend's. She needed to distance herself from her sister for one night at least.
Jimmy would know where to find her if needs be.
Siddy Clancy was laughing and Freddie laughed along with him even though he didn't think the joke was funny. But he knew how to play the game, he knew the score.