As Nathan’s car pulled into the driveway, Ben and Eric’s taxi pulled up to the house. “That made a lot of sense,” Nathan said as the three roommates headed for the door.
Ignoring the comment, Ben opened the front door and stepped inside.
“You should tell Ober what’s going on,” Eric suggested.
“I know,” Ben said. “But I don’t want to say anything in the house.” He noticed the yearbooks on the coffee table. “What was he doing tonight?”
“Probably reminiscing about better times,” Nathan said.
“I wasn’t asking you,” Ben said. Atop a pile of yearbooks, Ben saw a single sheet of white paper and picked it up.
“Dear Ben, Nathan, and Eric,” he read to himself. “I’m so sorry. I can’t possibly explain my actions to you, but I didn’t know what else to do. You’ll probably think this is another stupid Ober idea, but please understand that there’s no other way I’d be happy. For as long as I can remember, you have carried me forward, and I have held you back. Tell my mother she can go to hell, and tell Rick that I hope he drops dead. Also, tell my boss that I wasn’t trying to advance my career-I really want her to know that. If I can ask you one last favor, please take it easy on each other. I will miss you more than you’ll ever know. You’re my best friends and I love you. Ober.”
“Oh, my God,” Ben said, running toward the stairs. “OBER!!” he screamed.
Instinctively, Nathan and Eric followed.
“OBER, ARE YOU IN THERE?” Ben screamed, pounding on the locked door to Ober’s room. Ben turned to Eric and Nathan. “I think I found a suicide note!”
“OBER! OPEN UP!” Nathan screamed, pounding on the door.
“Break it down,” Ben said frantically.
“Move out of the way.” Nathan took a couple of steps back, then threw all his weight against the door.
“Again!” Ben said.
Once again, Nathan rammed his body into the door.
“KICK IT!” Eric shouted. “HURRY!”
Nathan rammed his foot into the door, and the door frame buckled. He rammed it again, and the door flew open. They all ran inside.
Ober was dangling against the closet door, a belt taut around his neck. “Omigod!” Eric said. “Omigod! Omigod!”
“Help me get him down,” Ben said as he and Nathan grabbed Ober’s legs and struggled to support his body. “Eric, open the door.”
Eric was hysterically crying. With his hands shaking and the tears rolling down his face, he didn’t even hear Nathan’s request. All he could see was Ober. “He’s dead!”
“OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!” Nathan screamed.
Eric pulled open the closet door, and Ober’s body slumped forward and fell to the floor. Instantly, Nathan rolled Ober on his back and started CPR.
“Hurry!” Ben said as Nathan pinched Ober’s nose. Taking a deep breath, Nathan tried to breathe life back into his friend.
“Look at his eyes!” Eric said, unnerved by the blank stare on Ober’s face. “He’s dead.”
Nathan shut Ober’s eyes and looked at Ben. “Get Eric the hell out of here.”
“Eric, go downstairs,” Ben said. “Call an ambulance.”
As Eric ran out of the room, Nathan pumped Ober’s chest and then listened for a heartbeat.
“There’s no pulse!” Ben said, holding Ober’s wrist.
“He’s all white,” Nathan said, looking at Ober’s pallid complexion.
“Keep trying,” Ben demanded. “Do it again!”
Futilely filling Ober’s lungs with air, Nathan continued to administer CPR.
“DON’T STOP!” Ben screamed, reading the disheartened look on Nathan’s face. “DO IT AGAIN!”
Once again, Nathan tried to bring back his friend. He pumped against Ober’s chest with his full strength, and did everything he could to elicit any sign of life. He listened closely for a heartbeat, but eventually pulled away. “Forget it. It’s over.”
“Let me try,” Ben said, pushing Nathan aside.
“Ben, it’s over.”
“Help me take him downstairs!” Ben demanded, lifting Ober’s feet. “Maybe the ambulance can revive him. They have that shock machine-”
“It won’t do any good,” Nathan said, sitting on the floor and leaning against Ober’s bed. “He’s gone.”
As the paramedics rolled the stretcher out of the house, Ben gave the suicide note and the leather belt to the policemen assigned to the scene. After interviewing the three roommates, one of the officers gave Ben his card. “I’d like to talk to you more about this.”
“We’ll come down tomorrow,” Ben said. He felt emotionally drained. Shutting his eyes, hoping to somehow shut out reality, Ben attempted to quell the throbbing pain at the back of his neck.
“I’m really sorry about your friend,” the other officer said.
“Thanks,” Ben said, walking the two officers to the door. When the police car and the ambulance pulled away from the house, Ben shut the door. Collapsing on the floor, he rolled on his back and tried his best to think clearly. A minute later, he turned toward Nathan, who was sitting at the glass table in the dining room. “Where’s Eric?” Ben asked.
Nathan peered through the glass, staring at his feet. “He’s in his room talking to his mom.”
“Is he okay?”
“Under the circumstances,” Nathan said. “When he gets off the phone, you should call Ober’s parents.”
“I have to call?” Ben asked. “I can’t do that.”
“Oh, yes, you can.” Nathan got out of his seat and headed for the stairs.
“Why me?” Ben asked, following his roommate.
“You’re the one responsible,” Nathan said curtly.
“Don’t you dare say that,” Ben warned.
Nathan turned from the stairs and looked at Ben in disbelief. “You’re not responsible?” he asked, approaching Ben. “Whose fault is it, then?” Nathan stood face-to-face with Ben in the living room. “Is it Ober’s fault? No, it can’t be Ober’s fault. Maybe it’s Rick’s fault. Maybe it’s my fault. Maybe it’s Senator Stevens’s fault.”
“It’s nobody’s fault,” Ben interrupted.
“So no one’s to blame?” Nathan asked. “This is something that just happened out of the blue?”
“Obviously, it didn’t just happen. And if it weren’t for me, Ober would probably still be alive. But that doesn’t mean I killed him.”
“No, you just put the belt around his neck.”
An angry silence filled the room. “You can really be a bastard, y’know that?”
“I just want to make sure that you-”
“That I what?” Ben interrupted, his eyes filled with tears. “That I blame myself? That I think it’s my fault? Don’t worry-I do. I hold myself one hundred percent responsible. I’m the one that put this whole thing in motion, and it’ll haunt me for the rest of my life. Until the day I die, there won’t be a single day that I don’t feel guilty about this.”
“You should feel guilty.”
“Don’t tell me how I should feel,” Ben said, his voice shaking. “Ober was my best friend! I would’ve done anything to save him.”
“You could’ve saved him,” Nathan said. “All you had to do was open your mouth.”
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Ben lashed out. “How can you be so callous? I was going to the authorities! That’s what tonight was all about! I didn’t know Ober’d kill himself! I didn’t know he was suicidal!”
“And I don’t know what you expect me to say. Do you think that just because you admit it’s your fault, I’ll absolve you of your sins? It doesn’t work like that. You killed him. Now you have to deal with it.”
Enraged, Ben punched Nathan in the stomach. “I DIDN’T KILL HIM!”
Bent over in pain, Nathan struggled to catch his breath.
“I DIDN’T KILL HIM,” Ben repeated. “HE KILLED HIMSELF!”
Still heaving, Nathan ran toward Ben, tackling him and sending them both crashing into the coffee table. The homemade table splintered in two, the yearbooks and the scrapbook sliding onto Nathan and Ben.