I could only defy and ridicule him as I watched him die — trapped between the world of the living and the dead upon the cross… but unbeknownst to me — unlike his followers who hid except his mother and the woman he loved above others — he did not release Himself from his corporeal state. He did not return to the Godhead as spirit but retained his form as a man resurrected, and I was astounded… I was even more fearful that He could take something so weak as flesh and make it far more powerful than the spirits who surrounded me. He was and is definitely God… I gave it one more shot through his beloved Peter… who denied the Christ three times as Christ told him he would. But the fisherman did not entertain my transgression… He simply told me to get behind him… to clear the path between him and the light of God… to hide among the shadows in shame. Peter would be another example of one whom I could not turn… yet he was a peculiar spirit. His denial appeared to be an opportunity, yet it only invigorated him through overcoming his shame… I could not benefit from his potential fall from the Lord’s grace… It was the resurrection of Christ and the process of rising above his folly that solidified Simon Peter, the rock upon which the church would be built…
Consider this, Saul who later became Paul, was another among you that should have literally fell to serve me… I was able to take hold of his mind and have him believe my thoughts were his thoughts — as many of you do… but I was wrong. The only thing I was able to do was be an unlikely messenger — still serving Him — and by placing a thorn in Saul’s side. This thorn sent not pain initially, but the prick of pride. And pride is my favorite emotion for it undermines all other drives of the mind or heart to overcome evil… Pride becomes evil because it manifests into self-righteousness. When you assess yourselves based on a foundation of what you desire, then you see no harm or fault in anything you do, and everything you do is correct and just based on a falsehood of knowing yourself better than God, just as I thought… and no one of the living , the dead, the immortal, or unborn can know themselves better than the one who created everything… But it is pride that makes many place merit into iniquity through rationalization… In other words, their path through life is based on righteous wickedness, which in itself can not exist and does not exist among the just…
Saul’s pride was my tool to control him and kill the followers of the Christ. But my mistake was by inflating his sense of self — I made him susceptible to the Christ-; he was not wary or grounded against his own humanity. He was not evil enough to be consumed by his anger and hate, thus his heart yearned for the glory that is God versus the power I offered him. I tried to play into Saul’s original futile attempt to place himself above Christ. In that sin, he was doing my work — but God used me to balance him — and Saul became Paul… but I take none of this personal… it is simply business…
I am either going to bring you balance through trial — by revealing to you your darkest nature or modeling for you the sinister nature of all mankind. I am going to strip you of your comfort zone and leave you feeling like an abandoned newborn — helpless… but only if you feel God is not with you, and you fail to push back to prove me wrong. I will kill, steal from, and destroy you… and if I but disrupt and sever that which connects you to God… the knowledge of God’s love, then you are more likely to spend eternity among my minions and serve me… Misery does not love company, but misery strives to control all it encounters. I was and will never get a second chance, and for that I will punish God’s creation that He placed above the Seraphim, placed above me! And you will not get a second chance either… I do not see the perfection in your imperfections you so loosely refer to as individuality and freewill… Therefore, I will never see His point in providing so many chances for you to redeem yourselves when you have failed far more many times than I ever did… I failed once… According to Him, no matter the magnitude, all sins are equal… So when I consider my one failure, my great failure versus your many trespasses… who deserves the contempt of God and who deserves His salvation? Who served him for an eternity, and who fails to serve him fully for a lifetime?
I thought to myself, he a number of points, but his failure to relinquish his pride is what led him to such damnation. His jealous of humankind fed his contempt for God. He never in any record of religion, legend, or myth… once prostrated himself, lowered himself before the Lord and begged for forgiveness. No, Satan’s sin lied in his demand to be recognized as equal with God versus being infinitely empowered by God. He continued…
I don’t think you humans are grateful enough, faithful enough, or disciplined enough to receive so much love, grace, and mercy that you receive… I wasn’t cast out of Heaven because I didn’t know the Word; it was because I knew the word better than all of you. It was not because I was not doing what I was created to do… it was because my perspective changed… and once I was aware of my perspective and allowed it to change the way I saw God, my belief in His all-powerful grace collapsed. I believed He was weak for placing you above far more powerful beings, yet strength lied within you because you have the capacity to overcome and override your baser instincts and place a certain altruism or self-sacrifice over your selfishness and freewill — where many of my kind… continue to fail… and suffer. We are your betters in strength, but not your betters in will. The human capacity of will can deny the strength of any evil if a human never allows him or herself to be fully consumed by it. This human becomes one among the sanctified who ascend above it all together… I was not powerful enough to overcome my will, my thoughts to believe God was less than He is… How can the Almighty be less at anything than the Almighty is? As created spirits that is our only limitation. We are only limited by our beliefs… and as humankind grows in its beliefs of disapproving the finger of God the more they limit themselves from true power, wisdom, and love.
The more humankind fails to love God in all God’s many names and forms, the more I win if not for a speck of eternity. Therefore, I pride myself on undermining what you are born into believing — life is the first proof of God because life is given from only God. Humanity can explain how it functions, but not how it came to pass… you can not explain how it began but you know how it ends… You know not the true path and purpose of miracle. You are still like children focused more on wonder than the reason miracles come to pass for your sake. Many of you feel there is no God and by default you serve me… though you do not believe I exist, you give me relevance by the mantra of atheism and indignantly claiming there is an absence of the One I oppose. Human pride is where I rule… Forfeit yourself if you will… Your spirit will always belong to Him, but your will… will belong to me… True, you have freewill. But what is freewill without discretion? Chaos! Humankind proves again and again it has no collective discretion…
To the best of my ability, I will challenge every human in their earthly lives, limiting you to see the light of God in the subtly of the physical world… like the power that lies in childbirth, miracles, weather, how well strangers can relate. No, I will disrupt this and make people turn inward and be isolated emotionally, only connecting or relating based on the senses such as in the world of science. It continuously is led not by the faithful as it once was, but non-believers and those like me you call evil are full of pride — and mock God. You will remain entertained and distracted from the path you are to take to salvation with God. You are entertained by the frivolous things of this world. I limit your perspective, and hopefully you will believe that this is all there is…. And Heaven will appear to be nothing to look forward to because it will seem as if it does not exist. I will try to keep you grounded in fear, so that I may entrap and enslave you in bondage… slowly taking your life and will to seek eternity in Him. I will do everything within my power to keep you from developing your cognitive, psychological, sociological, and above all spiritual capabilities… This is through discipline of the mind the body and spirit under the will of one force that is God. But without this discipline, you will be at war within yourself. Without this discipline that incorporates the mind you will not be able to better understand His word and glory via visions, wisdom, introspection, invocation, or prophecy… you will merely chirp like the birds of earth repeating songs and rhythms with no true understanding of their depth or power, battling for room to stand in your own filth…