12.
Wherever it was, in whatever city, it was a vast and crowded station. Through its high windows the sun made great solid bars of light in the dusty air that were vertiginous to look up at: he remembered that. Before that day or moment, nothing: a sensation of warmth and light, a golden orange, a white lace curtain, that might have been earlier, and might have been home.
Who it was that took him to that station; how he lost her, or him, or them; whether he was separated by chance from parents or uncles or schoolmates—nothing of that persisted. He didn’t know if he was an only child, or just the only one who was lost. Had he been set down on a bench there and told to wait, by a parent or a sibling who was then swept away in the crowds, pushed aboard a train still calling his name (that he remembered, his name and patronymic, of these he was sure). Or did someone just leave him there, hoping for the best, someone headed elsewhere (stay here Innokenti and don’t move and I’ll come back), to the Polish border or the Crimea or Central Asia, anyway far away and unwilling or unable to carry him? How had he lived, not knowing?
He didn’t remember coming to understand that something was wrong and whoever had brought him there was gone. Maybe he had come to that conclusion at last, and got up from his bench and started searching, thereby maybe losing himself certainly and finally, no matter if he or she or they who had told him to wait there had come back at last to collect him. All that was supposition. The first person he clearly remembered knowing—the earliest he could find by searching backwards—wasn’t a parent or any other kin, it was Teapot.
Probably he had started to cry, amid the endless people passing the place where he sat. Not many would have turned to listen, or pay much attention, there were just too many children like him, some crying as he was, some begging, some not moving, having stopped trying. If someone did stop for a moment, because this boy was clean and in good clothes and still seeming to think he had a claim on their kindness, they could still do nothing but ask him where his mother was, who was caring for him: and he didn’t remember any of those encounters if they happened. He remembered seeing the lean boy in a coat of no color and a shapeless cap, a teapot in his hand: how he slipped in and out among the travelers, apparently one of them and on his way somewhere (travelers everywhere then carried pots like that, to make their tea rather than buying it). But someone sitting long enough there, seeing him come and go, would come to understand he was not on his way anywhere.
He saw this boy steal a cloth bag that a mother put down, just for a moment so she could wipe the face of her crying child. It was under his coat and he was gone instantly, and then a while later he reappeared without it, with only his teapot, stopping strangers and telling them a story, a story most of them didn’t want to hear. Now and then one gave him a small coin, at which he immediately stopped talking and looked elsewhere.
Through the day he saw Innokenti too, and studied him. He came at last and sat next to him, and took from his pocket a scrap of newspaper and a pinch of loose tobacco. Night must have grown late, because the station was emptying, the last trains having left or never arrived. Teapot rolled his cigarette and then leapt up to pester the last passersby for a match. When his smoke was alight he sat again (Innokenti watching the perilous thing smolder and fume) and looked the little one over. What was he waiting for? Was he lost?
Innokenti couldn’t answer; he knew where he was, where he had been placed; how could he be lost?
Was he hungry? Yes, he was hungry.
Any money? Innokenti searched in his pockets, took out three kopeks and a lucky gold coin. Teapot took them and put them in his own pocket. He told Innokenti that in a while the stationmaster and the soldiers would go through the station and put out everybody who had no ticket. Did he have a ticket? He didn’t. He wasn’t to worry, though; Teapot would get him away in time.
They never get me, he said; he said he would go on a train to where he wanted to go, and he would go when he chose, and stay here till then.
Innokenti asked Teapot if he had a ticket. Sure he did, ten of them: and he held up his dirty hands. Innokenti later understood this joke, a common one among the kids: ten tickets, ten fingers to hold on to the rods or the ladders or somewhere else, and ride for free.
At the sound of a great door closing, Teapot leapt up, and grabbed the younger boy by his collar, and ran. They could hear the tramp of the soldiers, the shouting, and the homeless people who had hoped to sleep on the benches in the warmth pleading or cursing. Teapot led him away along the closed buffet and down a lightless passage and further downward to a locked door. A dim bulb far off showed that there was no farther they could go. Teapot put down his pot, took hold of Innokenti’s coat, and pulled it open; he felt within the younger boy’s clothes, though Innokenti tried feebly to pull his hands away, reaching into pockets and even touching his skin. He pulled a cross on a chain from his throat, and a pen from his pocket; two marbles, and a peppermint wrapped in paper. After he had pocketed these things he knelt before the locked door and somehow pushed out one of its lower panels. He bent Innokenti’s head toward the hole, and shoved him through into the utter darkness on the other side.
For a moment he thought he would be left there. He couldn’t cry out, couldn’t move. Then he felt a push from behind: Teapot cursed him, move along, and came in after him. When he was in, he turned and put the panel of the door back in place.
Now, he said. See?
He was close enough for Innokenti to smell him. It was hot in the lightless passage. Teapot lit a match—he had matches of his own, after all—and by its light found a stub of candle hidden in the rough wall, and lit it. The darkness lightened. And Teapot pulled him along the passage.
Innokenti would later come to learn the way down, and remember it ever after: it was dangerous not to know it, maybe fatal. How he was able to do it the first time he didn’t know; only because Teapot wouldn’t let him stop, or rest, or weep, but pushed him along and smacked his head when he stopped in fear or in the paralysis of total loss. Teapot had a trick of attaching the candle stub to his hat so that he could use both hands to climb downward on narrow iron ladders, warm to the touch, into airless darkness. Had Innokenti believed in hell, or even heard of it? Only a grown-up would think that a child might think of such a thing, that he was descending into those fires. But he heard noises too: a kind of sudden release of dragon breath, once there, again over there; and then an eerie long human whistle. Teapot stopped at the whistle, listened, and whistled back. They reached an iron floor slick with damp. Light came from a string of bulbs in iron cages overhead, dim as candles, many broken. They walked crabwise along the passage, inches from steam pipes whose heat they could feel on their faces, that now and then at valves released that sigh or sob, and steam hot enough to scorch flesh. Duck down here; don’t touch that; now stop and listen.
More whistles to answer. Then they wiggled through a hole in the thick rubble wall, and it was a little less stifling; Innokenti began to see other candles, and Teapot laughed and banged the lid of his chainik, and out from holes in the passage and from under piles of rags and from packing crates came white faces, girls and boys, old and young.
Got a new one, Teapot said.
Any money? said a voice, deeper, Innokenti couldn’t see whose it was. There were many children, more and more gathering, some looking at him, some uncaring. Dozens.
Nah, Teapot said. He’s just a psy.
And Teapot, who’d taken all his money and everything else he had, put his arm around Innokenti’s neck and hugged and grinned at him.