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I TAKE HER ASS IN MY TWO HANDS, LIKE A BIG FRUIT; and push it upwards, and while my tongue is playing there in the mouth of her sex, my fingers press into the flesh of her ass, travel around its firmness, into its curve, and my forefinger feels the little mouth of her anus and pushes gently.

Suddenly Mary gives a start—as if I have touched off an electric spark. She moves to enclose my finger. I press it farther, all the while moving my tongue inside of her sex. She begins to moan, to undulate.

When she sinks downwards she feels my flicking finger, when she rises upwards she meets my flicking tongue. With every move, she feels my quickening rhythm, until she has a long spasm and begins to moan like a pigeon. With the finger I feel the palpitation of pleasure, going once, twice, thrice, beating ecstatically.

— ANAIS NIN[46]

Positions for Anal Penetration

All the positions people employ for vaginal penetration can be used for anal penetration. Since everyone has individual needs, tastes, and desires, it is important to experiment with all kinds of positions to discover what works best for you and your partner.

Missionary Position (figure 9)

Among hip, liberated women, the missionary position has gotten a bad rap in recent years because it works well for men but usually affords women no clitoral stimulation. There are plenty of ways to slightly amend this “traditional” position to make it work for you. This position finds the receptive partner on her or his back and the insertive partner on top. Because both partners face each other, it is easier to communicate, especially nonverbally, plus you can attend to other parts of your partner’s body suck on her nipples, kiss his neck, nibble her lips. Many people in the receptive position like missionary-style anal penetration because lying on their back either feels more comfortable or allows them a sense of surrendering to their partner.

I like to be on my back when she fucks me in the ass. She’s in control and I feel like I am giving my body over to her. if she uses her hand, she can do my butt and work my clit at the same time. if she’s got the strap-on on, and we get at just the right angle, her thrusts can rub my clit.

When my lover is on her back, I feel like I am topping her and her ass is mine. It’s powerful, although I know that she’s the one who’s really in charge.

The receptive partner may find that a pillow under her butt makes for easier penetration, and she can bend her knees or either bring her legs to her chest or rest them on her partner’s shoulders. Although the latter position may create a better angle for entry, it is one that even the most flexible among us often find hard to sustain. In this position, your partner usually cannot provide clitoral stimulation, but you can provide your own with your hand or a vibrator.

Receptive Partner on Top (figure 10)

In the receptive-partner-on-top position, the receptive partner can control the angle and depth of penetration. Straddling the insertive partner, she or he can sit straight up, or lean forward or backward according to her or his own desires. Again, facing each other means you can talk and communicate as well as stroke, rub, pinch, and stimulate other parts of each other’s bodies; this position is also great for clitoral stimulation. Receptive partners can really take the lead in this position and be in charge of the depth of insertion, the amount of movement, and the rhythm of whatever is doing the penetrating—finger(s), butt plug, dildo, or penis.

I like to be on top for anal sex. I can slowly sit down on his dick, taking my time to make sure my ass is ready. He can play with my clit as I lower myself onto him, and he loves to look at me, and talk dirty to me while we’re doing it.

Insertive partners who are inexperienced, nervous about how to penetrate their partners anally, or fearful of hurting their partners may find this position most relaxing because the receiver can do much of the decision making and work. The partners on the bottom often report liking this position best because they get a great view of their partner and can watch them as they receive pleasure.

If we have anal penetration with the dildo, I want her to be in charge. She knows better how fast and deep to go, plus I like to see her do all the work.

Doggie-Style (figure 11)

The doggie-style position is probably the first one many of us think of when we think about anal sex. Doggie-style is also a popular image in porn magazines and videos. This position, with the receptive partner on her hands and knees and the insertive partner behind her, is best for deep penetration.

Because the rectum is in the most straight (not bent) position, the insertive partner can get good depth that is also comfortable to the receiver. If the receptive partner is a woman, this position also makes it easy to reach around and rub her clitoris.

Doing it doggie-style also means both partners can have lots of pelvic movement. The insertive partner can do a lot of deep, hard, or fast thrusting; the receptive partner can move back on or ride fingers, a dildo, or penis from this angle. Many people like to have their partner penetrate them from behind for a fast and frenzied kind of fuck. As when the receptive partner is on top, she can also be in control of the action if the insertive partner does less of the movement and lets the receiver come to her.

I love doggie-style the best. My boyfriend starts out slowly, but as my ass opens up, he can really fuck me from behind just like he fucks my pussy. He says he likes it too because he loves the feeling of my butt cheeks slamming against him.

For giving, I like her on all fours with her ass in the air so I can see all the activity. For receiving—being on all fours or on my back… My favorite of all, though, is being bent over a table and gettin’ it from behind.

My current partner can be an incredibly sensual, effeminate submissive male. I love to see him with his ass in the air and his back arched, and I love the way he looks when tell him to ride my cock and he thrusts himself back against me while I just kneel there, occasionally grabbing his hips or slapping his butt.

In a variation on this position, the receptive partner is on her stomach with her knees either bent or straight. Although this one may seem awkward on first try, it just takes a little practice. This, too, is a good position for medium or deep penetration because the rectum is in an optimum position for smooth entry (as long as you don’t forget that important curve!).

Spooning and Reverse Spooning (figure 12)

In the spooning position, both partners are on their sides either facing each other or facing the same direction. This position is comfortable, flexible, and easily maneuver-able, and it gives both partners good control over the angle and depth of penetration; it’s an ideal position for partners who are of very different heights or sizes. Some people find that lying side by side gives them greater access to their partner’s vagina, clitoris, penis, balls, and other parts of each other’s bodies for exploration and stimulation. You don’t get the depth of penetration this way that you get with other positions; however, spooning is good for a long, slow anal fucking session, where no one’s in a rush to get somewhere. But don’t get me wrong you can still have ecstatic orgasms this way.

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46

AnaIs Nin, “Mandra” in Little Birds (New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich Inc., 1979), 131.