I’m a sick bastard so one of my favorite props is a body bag. I don’t mean a bondage bag or a sleepsack. I mean a body bag—you know, the kind they put your corpse in so that your decaying juices won’t get all over the place. What do I do with it? Nothing, really. I just leave it out. Let them see it. If they ask about it, I change the subject. Control the Info. Less Is More. (Told you I’d sound like a psycho killer. I’m not, really.)
If you’re the Top you’re also going to need to develop a character. This is like role play, with one minor, crucial difference: the Top is playing a role but the bottom absolutely cannot be. They just have to be themselves, because if they feel as if they’re playing a role they know it’s not real. But the Mindfucker needs to be absolutely convincing, and sometimes that means thinking inside the bottom’s head and then beyond it. Let me tell you about the psycho killer. He’s not angry; he doesn’t yell. That’s not how to freak out a bottom. Instead, the psycho killer is perfectly calm—a little too calm, if you know what I mean. Fucks them up every time.
I should point out that characters play a role primarily in fear-based mindfucks. In some fantasy-based ones, both of you might be playing a character. In faith-based ones, neither of you should, since it’s all about bringing trust and submission to a whole new level.
True for all mindfucks, though, is that you need movement (or development) and a climax: the scene has to be going somewhere. It might be someplace the bottom knows, or not. For example, in a castration scene, you’re clearly building up to a climax. How fast do you want to move to it? Whatcha gonna do when you get there? As the Top, you should plan these elements in advance and then direct the scene like a theater director.
FUCKING: BEFORE, DURING, AFTER
Before any mindfuck you need to have communication. As a Top, you need to know what the bottom’s trip is and what makes their trip their trip. As a bottom, you need to think about the details. So you want to be kidnapped. Okay, but how? Grabbed and put in a van? Chloroformed? Spiked drink? The details make all the difference. The information should flow mostly one way, of course (see Rule One) but this communication is vital for the bottom too. Does this Top “get” you and your scene? Does she get your head space? You have to know before you show up.
And showing up takes some trust. Fuck, any good scene takes trust. In a mindfuck there needs to be some core of trust—but just enough. As I said before, there should be just enough trust for both parties to show up and start things off. More than that and it’s just going to get in the way. Now, sufficient communication will go a long way in building this trust, but different bottoms will need different levels of assurance. Of course the exception here is the faith-based mindfuck, which is all about trust, which builds on trust already in place.
The last thing you need to do before a mindfuck is have a plan. Spontaneous mindfucks are possible (just run into me at the bar and find out), but the better ones, the more elaborate ones, take some time, some thought, and often a lot of planning. The Top may need to gather specific resources; if nothing else, she should be planting suggestions about what may or may not happen in the bottom’s mind.
During the scene different parties have different things to do. Tops: Assume your character and stay in it. Be schizoid, too. That is, one part of your brain has to be all in psycho killer mode (or for a fantasy-based mindfuck, mad scientist mode); the other part of your brain needs to be sane, needs to monitor both the bottom and that other psycho part of the brain in play. Remember, you can’t stop and check in with a bottom in a mindfuck: “Are you okay? Am I raping you hard enough? Is this gun too scary? Should I put it away?” Ugh. Scene ruined. Being schizoid is the only way. Read the bottom and yourself at all times. That schizoid part also has to be thinking several steps ahead while being adaptable, all at the same time. In more than one scene I could tell the faggot’s level of fear was getting dangerously high, so I had to move things forward to the climax before it all got out of hand.
And bottoms, you have shit to do too. First off, you’ve got to be readable if your schizo Top is going to have any chance to keep things fun. That means being in the moment and communicating where you are in terms of fear or arousal. Yeah, okay, maybe you can’t make your dick hard or your pussy wet on command, but you can certainly control your moans, your begging, even the look in your eyes—an intoxicating mix of fear and trust.
After the scene it’s time for aftercare, as in any scene. Fear-based mindfucks tend to need the most aftercare. Step one: dissipate the danger. If you were using a gun, it’s time to put it away. If the fag Jew is still looking at a swastika, his brain is still pumping out adrenaline. Remove all danger to stop the flow of adrenaline, then wait for them to come down. Remember, we’re talking fight-or-flight here. It’s gonna take them some time to come down from it all. After that, it’s time to discuss what happened—what worked, what didn’t, what went through whose mind when. And, hey, it’s never a bad idea to check in a day or two later as well.
Now, if a mindfuck is done right you can have all of the danger with none of the actual risk; for example, fake gun equals lots of danger and no risk.
HANDLING DANGER
Now, if a mindfuck is done right you can have all of the danger with none of the actual risk; for example, fake gun equals lots of danger and no risk. But still, because mindfuck is such a powerful scene (because so much of it happens up in the head), there are some real and serious risks to keep in mind. The biggest risk of most mindfucks is that the bottom will freak out. Fortunately, I’ve never had a bottom do that on me—probably more out of luck than skill, though. Still, I’ve thought about what to do in such a situation. Here are my recommendations:
1. First, absolutely remove all dangers, real or fake.
2. Second, ask the bottom what he needs. Anything you say or do without asking this first is what the psycho killer would do. What do I mean? Well, you offer him a drink—he thinks, That’s what the psycho killer would do. You offer to hold her until she calms down—she thinks, That’s what the psycho killer would do. You suggest that it’s probably not a good idea to leave right now because they’re all jacked up on adrenaline—and they think what? Yep, you guessed it: That’s what the psycho killer would do. But asking the bottom what he needs is different, because psycho killers don’t do that.
3. Third, have the bottom call someone he or she knows and trusts. Again, the psycho killer would never do that (witnesses only create complications); it also reconnects the bottom to the real world. They may not feel sure of the real world at first. Ideally, they’ll be able to chat with their friend until the they’re calm enough for some real aftercare—getting that drink, being held, even leaving.
There is one other potential danger, but just for Tops. I don’t know how big this danger is, really. Based on my experience, if you do a lot of mindfuck and you do it well, people will fear you. Depending on your local community, this could mean fewer partners. The flip side, of course, is that your new reputation will do most of the work for you. Heck, some folks won’t ever believe I’m not mindfucking them. Kinda hot, kinda sucks.