I took her over to one of the less crowded corners. I bent the dolly over my knee. She was a bit stiff, like maybe she wasn’t really supposed to bend that way. She flopped over face-first onto the couch.
The dolly wore a short little skirt. First I smoothed it out for modesty’s sake and touched her through her clothes. But after a while, I got curious to see what was underneath. I lifted her skirt and she had these beautiful pale-blue panties with a little keyhole detail at the top. Very soft. I fondled her ass through her panties. The dolly was anatomically perfect. Her ass was full and round. My palm wrapped around each cheek perfectly. She was like a custom doll fitted just for me. I became bolder and moved her panties out of the way. I rubbed her butt with my hand. She was so soft, like human flesh.
I sat back and lightly spanked the dolly on my lap and watched the party for a little while. There was a bit more activity and the sling had a group around it. I spanked the dolly a little more intensely and got a rhythm going. I was very happy spanking the dolly. All of a sudden the dolly shuddered a bit. Uh-oh! Was there some kind of internal mechanism that I had jolted? Did I break the dolly?
I don’t think anybody noticed anything wrong. The dolly seemed to be working okay again. I decided to pretend as if nothing bad happened. I pulled on the dolly’s long red hair until she sat up again. She looked okay and it even seemed that her smile was bigger. Maybe that was just my imagination. I held her in my lap for a while.
SPANKING
Back in the days before I discovered kink, my favorite vanilla sex was rough doggie style. For me, it was more about getting slammed from behind than it was about fucking. That rhythmic pounding felt very good to me. When I finally found the BDSM/kink community, I discovered spanking and my sex life took off.
Some people call spanking a gateway to BDSM, and it’s true, many of us start on our kink path with spanking and explore further from there. Other people focus strictly on spanking, and there are whole spanking communities for them, even some who believe that spanking is totally nonsexual. Ack! As for me, I think spanking is the perfect foreplay.
Spanking is great for novices because you don’t need any fancy equipment. Some people new to kink can be frightened or intimidated by heavy-duty black leather implements like paddles and truncheons. With spanking, you can just use your hands. It’s so convenient.
Some of us get spanked just because it feels good—it’s purely about the sensation of a cadenced beating. A good spanking can give you and your partner much pleasure. The goal is not to hurt the receptive partner, but rather to give them an erotic and sensual experience.
Spanking has always had a strong association with punishment: tanning someone’s hide is supposed to teach them a lesson, keep them in line, and make them behave better in the future. This can lead to marvelous role play scenarios. You can be a parent, babysitter, teacher, or nun and give your naughty boy or girl a spanking for doing something bad. Or perhaps a spanking is a reward for good service, a ritual to start a scene, or a birthday surprise for your favorite “kid.” Public spankings, at a play party or leather event, can be part of a rite of passage—perhaps an initiation to a group or fraternity. Get into the fantasy of it and have fun.
Always communicate with your partner and negotiate a spanking before it happens. Remember, some people are triggered by spanking, punishment, or certain kinds of role play. They may have had bad experiences growing up and spanking may push them to an emotionally dangerous place. Don’t force it.
Before you start, set up a good environment for your spanking. The room temperature should be comfortable. Unless you want to set up a role play scenario out in the woodshed, nobody can enjoy themselves if they are shivering. Adjust the lighting. Music can alter the whole scene: for example, a boppy song like Madonna’s “Hanky Spanky” will set an entirely different mood than a Gregorian chant. Of course, one atmosphere is not better than another. Add your own touches. Make it your own.
You don’t need any accessories or physical preparation for this activity, but it is a good idea to find a position that works for both of you. Get comfortable, because for a nice long sensual spanking you may want to stay in this position for a while. Try sitting on the couch with your partner across your lap. I love what I call the “Princess” position, where I pile all the pillows behind me on the bed and relax propped up like royalty with my partner lying across me right under my hand.
There are other good positions, depending on what you want to emphasize. If you want your partner in a position where you can get access to his genitals, have him bend over a sturdy table or a chair. Or, if you are in a dungeon, there are pieces of equipment like a horse or spanking bench that work well. Maybe your spanking is part of a role play scenario where you sit in a chair and your partner lies over your lap for a traditional over-the-knee (OTK) spanking. If you want to be really strict and give your bottom a physical challenge, have her stand and bend over holding her ankles or knees.
There are also psychological considerations to positioning. You can control somebody by using bondage or holding them down. How you hold them can instill a sense of safety or fear. You can have them present themselves in a manner that reinforces submission or humiliation. For example, responding to your order to kneel on the bed with her head down and her ass up in the air can be very submissive; taking his pants down and letting them pool around his ankles could be humiliating to some people.
And some positions are just more ergonomic for the spanker. What feels best to you? If you need to hit hard, try a position to give you the ability to swing your arm with the most power. And there’s no reason to just stay in one position the whole time. It is okay to move around.
A spanking scene should not be rushed. Feel the intimacy. Enjoy this different kind of closeness. It can be especially sensuous if you are both naked. Feel the weight of your partner’s body, his skin texture, the way he breathes, the way he moves. Set the tone through intentional touch. For example, holding someone close to you with your nonspanking hand can give a feeling of being protected and taken care of. Grabbing ahold of your bottom’s hair can make her feel dominated or even terrorized.
A spanking can be pleasurable, painful, or both—it can “hurt so good.” What can be very confusing is that different people like different levels of sensation. What one person experiences as a medium spanking can feel like a severe spanking to someone else. So, how do we regulate ourselves so that the experience is good? Start slowly!
Warm-up is very important. It prepares your partner. You are seducing your partner both physically and mentally. Rub your partner’s butt lightly. Take a lot of time and let him become accustomed to your touch. Move to light pats and escalate very slowly to slaps. If you take your time, your partner will adjust to the heavier sensations gradually. It is very important to build slowly so that your partner will interpret the spanking as pleasure and not as pain.
Communication is very important here. The person getting spanked should be giving feedback. Do you like the sensation? Then say so! Not all audible feedback is through words. Moan. Purr. Giggle. And feedback can be nonverbal as well. Writhe. Wiggle. Raise your butt to meet the spanks. But sometimes the feedback is not so easy to interpret. What if the person getting spanked growls or starts stomping her feet? What does that mean? It could be a reaction that means the spanking is good or it could mean it’s too much. The spanker should pause and ask, “What does it mean when you growl like that?” Sometimes the person getting spanked cries. For some people that is a good thing; it is a cathartic way of letting go, clearing the mind, or cleansing emotions. For one person, it can feel really good to cry and keep going; for another, crying means the scene is over.