Mare sniffed and thought, Yeah, remind me again of how my life never changes. ‘There might be something new on here.’
He hooked a finger over the edge of the menu and pulled it down to look at her, exasperated, ‘There’s never anything new in this one-horse town.’
Mare snapped the menu down. ‘Something new happened once. The horse left. Why did you leave me without a word, you bastard?’
He scowled at her. ‘Hey, I called three times the next day and got the usual runaround from Dee. I came to see you but I couldn’t come in, like always, and you wouldn’t talk to me.’
Mare blinked. ‘Talk to you? I had three pins in my arm. I was doped to the gills on Percocet, for crying out loud. Of course I wanted to talk to you when I was lucid again. I was in love with you.’
‘Well, you didn’t call me,’ Crash said, looking around the diner as Mare’s voice rose. He leaned forward as he lowered his voice. ‘I figured since I’d almost killed you, and you never called me back, you were done with me.’
‘And you didn’t stick around to ask?’ Mare said, madder than ever. ‘You just left the next day?’
Crash sighed. ‘Mare, I didn’t see much future for us. At the best of times, your sister hated me, and you never let me get too close. After the accident…’ He looked down into his coffee cup. ‘I didn’t think dumping you on my bike in the middle of the road and breaking your arm was going to make things any better. So yeah, when you wouldn’t see me, I left.’
‘Oh, well, so fine,’ Mare said. ‘You want to end the relationship, you say-’
‘No.’ He met her eyes. ‘I didn’t want to end anything, I just wanted… out. Out of Salem’s Fork, I’d wanted out of here for a long time. But I couldn’t leave you. And then I called and you wouldn’t talk to me, and things were lousy with my dad, and he kept telling me I almost killed you and didn’t deserve you-’
‘Well, your dad’s a jerk, we all knew that,’ Mare said. ‘But-’
‘-and Dee felt the same way and Dee’s not a jerk-’
‘Dee’s overprotective,’ Mare said, starting to see the past more clearly. ‘But you still should have talked to me, damn it. You didn’t even talk to me.’
‘I tried,’ he said, and tilted his empty coffee cup again, and Mare sat back, knowing he had tried, and that he was right about her keeping him away before that, too, keeping secrets like I’m a witch, because that kind of thing was hard to explain and could get Dee and Lizzie burned at the stake or whatever they did to witches in the twenty-first century, probably studied in Area 51 or something, and then Pauline stopped to fill his cup for him, peering at him over her glasses.
‘So you’re back, are you?’ she said. ‘Where you been?’
Mare looked up. ‘Pauline, we’re having a conversation here.’
‘Yeah, everybody heard you.’ Pauline raised her penciled-in eyebrows. ‘Just like old times, you whipping him into shape again. You can take your sunglasses off. The sun went down in here after breakfast.’ She nodded at Crash again. ‘So where you been?’
‘Italy,’ Crash said.
Italy. Mare looked away, at the jukebox selector on the tabletop, biting her lip. Italy. She began to flip through the cards. She’d stayed in Salem’s Fork and kept her secrets and cried for months, and he’d gone to Italy. Where there was probably dust and sunshine.
‘No shit.’ Pauline balanced her arm on her hip, holding the coffeepot dangerously near Crash’s ear as she absorbed that.
Crash slid two quarters across the table to Mare - just like old times - and she swallowed hard. It didn’t matter that he hadn’t taken her to Italy, she didn’t speak Italian anyway. Of course, neither did he back then. He probably did now. Italy. She blinked back tears. Hell, she’d have gone to Outer Mongolia if he’d asked.
No she wouldn’t have. Dee and Lizzie would have gotten burned at the stake without her. She was the only one who knew how to use the shotgun. Lizzie can make muffins, Mare thought, but I can lock and load.
‘Good food in Italy?’ Pauline was saying.
‘Yeah,’ Crash said, and Mare could tell from his voice that he was watching her, so she put the quarters in and punched some buttons at random.
‘Italy’ Pauline said, as Kim Richey began to sing. ‘Damn.’
So I didn’t punch the buttons at random, Mare thought as Kim sang about buying a new red dress to keep her spirits up because her boyfriend was gone. Damn subconscious.
‘So in Italy-’ Pauline began.
‘You should go tell someone about that, Pauline,’ Mare said from behind her sunglasses. ‘That’s hot news. Don’t want it to cool off.’
Pauline nodded. ‘Back in a minute,’ she said and headed for the kitchen.
Crash didn’t look exasperated anymore, just tired. ‘Mare, there wasn’t any reason to stay if you didn’t want me around, if you wouldn’t talk to me. And I knew why you wouldn’t. I swear, I didn’t see that trash barrel roll into the street. I was watching the road, I don’t know where the hell it came from. I have replayed it over and over in my head, and I swear-’
Mare blinked at him. ‘That’s okay, that could have happened to anybody, I’m not mad about that.’ She shook her head. ‘That’s not it at all.’
‘I wouldn’t have taken any chances with you behind me.’ He met her eyes, straight on. ‘You were everything to me.’
Kim sang, ‘You’ll never know how much I love you,’ and Mare sat back. ‘Well, I’m nothing to you now, so it doesn’t matter, does it?’
He leaned forward, and Pauline came back to take their order.
‘Maxine says welcome back, and she saw this movie about Tuscany and wants to know if that’s where you are.’
Mare scowled at her. ‘Since when do you ask questions for Maxine? You’ve had Maxine completely terrorized for years and now you’re her lackey?’
Pauline grimaced. ‘It’s supposed to be this big secret, but Maxine bought the diner two days ago.’
Mare’s annoyance vanished. ‘Oh, bad luck, Pauline.’
‘No shit,’ Pauline said. ‘You’re not going to believe this one: starting tonight, we’re serving martinis.’
‘No.’ Mare leaned closer. ‘How the hell did she get a liquor license that fast?’
Pauline leaned in, too. ‘You got me. I’d say she was giving blow jobs, but I don’t think Ferris Tuttle over at the license bureau has a dick.’
‘Good point,’ Mare said.
‘Do you mind?’ Crash said to both of them.
‘So is that where you are?’ Pauline said to him. ‘Where Maxine said? Tuscany?’
‘Yes,’ Crash said.
Pauline turned around and yelled, ‘That’s where he is, Maxine.’
Over behind the counter, little dark-haired, rumpled Maxine gave him a thumbs-up, and Crash gave her a nod and turned back to Mare, looking as if he were thinking, This is why I left.
‘So,’ Pauline said. ‘What’ll it be?’
Crash said, ‘Two hamburgers, one medium well, one medium rare, pickles on both, cheese on the medium well, fries, two Cokes, one diet, with water chasers. Wait fifteen minutes then bring a chocolate milkshake. Large.’
‘Hungry, are you?’ Mare smiled at Pauline. ‘I’ll have-’
‘I just ordered for you,’ Crash said, looking impatient.
‘That’s what we always got. Can we finish our conversation now?’
‘Well, I’ve changed,’ Mare said. ‘You leave a woman alone for five years, she’s gonna change.’ She smiled at Pauline again. ‘I’d like ketchup on the medium rare burger and a lemon slice in the Diet Coke and in the water, please. And make the shake a strawberry.’