We waited the two hours needed for the batteries to charge before I retrieved the panels. During the wait, we ate our breakfast, plotted our course, and then, after they were reattached, we left. We rose up, wobbling between the trees like a puppet on strings.
Skimming through the air like a bug, I decided I liked this untouched-by-humans part of the forest. The hand of our inferior species hadn’t razed this corner, stumped its growth. It meant the trees were full. The world was wild and how it should be.
I focused on my sister, purposefully seating her between Joseph and me. Unspoken, un-dealt-with things stacked between us. Just because I was willing to stay, to hold onto him, didn’t mean I was fine. Every time I let my thoughts drift, they kept wandering back to the same place like a self-destructive homing pigeon. Him and her. It turned my stomach over once and then knotted it tightly.
I put my hand in Rosa-May’s hair mindlessly stroked the top of her head as we whirred over the tops of the trees, the foliage of each touching the other like a dense, squidgy floral arrangement.
“Look down there,” I said, pointing to a large gap in the trees. She glanced at it unenthusiastically and then went back to her fidgety fingers. She had half-moons in her fingernails, just like me. I thought of Mother, trimming her nails and mine. Chastising me when I had chewed them, sighing, always sighing at my defiance. Her memory coated this child like an extra layer of skin.
A smashed section of mirror lay on the land—a lake, reflective in the middle and frozen around the edges. The ice crept inwards like white ghosts racing to the center of the water. I craned my neck and could see the black underbelly of the chopper reflected in the water.
Joseph pinched Rosa-May’s elbow and winked at her. “See over there?” He pointed to the middle. When he spoke to her, he forced air and light into his tone and it lifted her head. “They say there’s a monster living in the bottom of the lake, and when children laugh, it jumps out of the water and does a flip.”
I wanted to ask, Who’s they? I wanted to play along, but I didn’t.
I rolled my eyes, but Rosa-May looked up from her lap and pressed her face to the window behind us, twisting in her harness. While she peered out of the window, Joseph tickled her. Her laugh was husky, chords running side by the side. I laughed too and Joseph caught my eye, grinning. My stupid heart kicked into gear.
“I saw it! Did you see it?” he shouted. She shook her head, pouting. We passed over the lake and brushed the tips of the trees again. “Well, on our way home, you better look more closely.” She nodded, very serious.
I covered my mouth but a small giggle slipped out.
The air cooled as the chopper climbed, the green forest gradually swallowed by white. I put my arm around Rosa-May’s shoulders and rubbed her little arms. My hand brushed Joseph’s elbow, and he sighed loudly when I withdrew sharply.
“Sorry,” I shouted.
He shook his head. “Don’t be,” he said, reaching for my face.
I let him touch my cheek briefly before I twisted away. The feelings were the same with just this one obstacle: A paper-thin picture I couldn’t get out of my head. This was difficult, wanting and not wanting out of principle at the same time.
The angle of the chopper changed abruptly, and we were scaling a mountain. I laughed and both Rosa-May and Joseph gave me a curious look. Pietre had certainly taken me literally when I’d said take Orry somewhere ‘up’.
The higher we climbed, the thinner and shorter the forest became. Evidence of humans sprung out of the ground in black and rust. Seats hung from wire strung between long poles, moving independent of the wind like the spirits of the past were swinging their legs in them. I shuddered as we flew directly over the wire. These were the skeletons of a life and culture long gone.
Near the peak, the straight, flat lines of multi-story buildings peeked out from beneath lumps of snow. Deshi waved his slender arms about, pointing through the front window. Below, a building with a faded, red H painted on the roof rose out of the white like a dirty, grey building block no would want to play with. Denis nodded and swung over the top of it.
The chopper swayed and wavered in the wind, easing itself down clumsily until its legs hit the concrete roof with a plastic slap.
Deshi turned, his dark brows raised in excitement. “This is as close as I could get us safely. We’ll have to walk from here,” he said with an edge of a squeal lurking behind his expression.
“How far?” I asked, my legs burning to run.
Deshi beamed. He understood. Soon, he would see Hessa and I would see Orry.
“Not far at all.”
ROSA
I stepped out of the chopper and slammed into a cold wall of air. The sun was deceivingly bright and glaring, bouncing off the white and stabbing my eyes. Denis quickly unfolded the solar panels and left the battery to charge. We piled on every item of clothing we had. With my overly padded arm, I snatched the handheld back from Deshi as soon as he pulled it from the chopper console, switching it on like a greedy child. I needed to see the red light. Search for it. Focus on it. The best of me was floating on a red light somewhere out there.
“Wait. Shouldn’t we turn it off now that we’re on the ground?” Joseph asked, placing his hand on the screen and resting it over my palm.
Denis gave a tight, condescending smile. “We are the Superiors last concern right now. I wouldn’t worry.”
I slapped Joseph’s hand away. The light blinked, still in the same place as before.
We shuffled on the icy concrete towards an old, green door that seemed to stick up out of nowhere. Joseph kicked the rotten wood, his foot going straight through without any effort. Rosa-May dug her fingers into his neck. I pushed the rest through with my hands. It felt like an old sponge and smelt about as bad. Flicking a torch on, we walked down the slippery steps. The thin streams of light revealed nothing but dingy corners and prints of people flying through the air with long planks attached to their feet. Black mold framed the edges of the shots, spreading like a disease cloud.
“I’m guessing this used to be a ski lodge,” Denis announced as he paused at one of the dimpled photos. When none of us responded, he said, “I’m also guessing none of you know what that is?”
“You guessed right,” Deshi replied with a smile on his face.
Denis’ face lit up at Deshi’s smile.
I tuned them out as they politely conversed about a sport where people propelled themselves down a snow-covered hill on things called skis for fun. I was still trying to decide if Denis had made up for all the horrible things he’d done to me—let them do to me. Gripping the railing, I stilled as memories of every time he’d dropped me at that black door started assaulting my head. I swayed from side to side, trying to clear it. Like if I tapped hard enough, I could somehow evacuate the images from my head like sauce stuck in the bottom of a bottle. I lost my balance, and Joseph caught the back of my shirt before I fell down the stairs.
“Rosa, what’s going on? Are you ok?” Joseph leaned over me from the step above as Rosa-May’s small face peeked over his shoulder. She squinted under my torchlight.
Denis and Deshi froze a few steps above us, their eyes wandering as they tried to avoid intruding on our conversation.
“I’m fine,” I replied, because I didn’t know how to be honest with him. Even though he had hurt me, I had no desire to hurt him back with images he couldn’t rid himself of. The torture and pain were a steady flow of horror I still wanted to protect him from.