“He and his males held captive three warriors of the Midanna,” I replied. “Even had I been willing to abandon Ilvin, who followed me in disobedience to my will, I could not stand before the enemy clans and demand the leadership of them after having left two of their number to their fate. It was therefore necessary that I free the Summa before continuing on with my task.”
“Your task,” echoed Mehrayn, looking strangely at me. “A task which you insisted you were to attempt alone, and which then became another task. Was it demanded by your Mida that this second task also be seen to alone, or was there a reason other than that which kept you from returning and asking Sigurri assistance?”
“You would have had me seek out males to assist in the freeing of Midanna?” I asked, amused at so strange a suggestion. “Never do males seek to aid Midanna, only to use them. It was my intention to see those warriors ride free, not to cause them to be chained in alcoves for Sigurri pleasure.”
Much did it seem that Mehrayn was hurt and angered then, yet where would have come the reason for such feelings? Had I, myself, not been made slave by the Sigurri, finding freedom solely through the strength of my swordarm and their belief that I rode as a messenger of their god?
“So you continue to see us as no more than ‘males,’ ” said Mehrayn, his bitterness taking the amusement from me. “Was it with thoughts of use that Chaldrin followed you, intending to allow none to keep him from raising his sword beside yours? Was it with thoughts of use that he hastened back to me, to speak of the enemy trail you had for some reason taken up? Was it with thoughts of use that we all rode after, praying to Sigurr that we find you before harm came from those followers of the putrid Oneness? Surely it was with thoughts of use that we slew them all, saw to your wounds, and gave comfort and easing of those poor creatures who had been so brutally used!”
Much indignation flashed from the eyes of Mehrayn, his head held high as he looked down upon me, his body stiff in the crouch he had taken. I, myself, felt no more than confusion, for Ceralt had also once spoken in such a manner. Always did these males make unreasonable demands upon a warrior; how was a warrior to know what moved a male?
“What other reason might there have been?” I asked, the words faltering. No more than the distant ache in my hands did I feel, and then was the anger and indignation gone from the male.
“It gives me pain that no other reason occurs to you,” he sighed, “a pain which stems mainly from a deeper understanding of that which has been done to you to cause you to feel so. Suffice it to say that we are here, and shall not allow further harm to come to your wenches. You may rest easy in the knowledge that you have my word.”
“The word of Mehrayn has proven honorable,” I assured him, seeking to take the sadness from his eyes. “Jalav accepts it gladly, and without reserve.”
“You do me great honor, I know,” said Mehrayn, a faint smile turning his lips as his hand reached out to stroke my hair. “Now must you do me further honor by partaking of that which I have brought. First the broth, to ease the knots of pain from your belly, and then the nilno, to restore some portion of the blood and flesh which was lost to you. Do you feel yourself capable of holding the nilno within?”
“I shall make the effort,” said I, for the first time looking directly within the pot which held the nilno. Barely warmed by the fire was it, bloody and raw as I most preferred it, yet did my insides lurch some small amount at the sight. Wounds often stole the appetite from a warrior; however I had to fortify myself for the journey I must immediately resume. I reached my hands out to the pot of broth, saw the cloth covering them before recalling its presence, then made a small sound of annoyance. No other than a male would bind a warrior’s hands so closely, and clearly would the cloth need to be removed before I might again take up sword and dagger and kan’s reins.
“Here, I will assist you,” said Mehrayn, his large hand taking the pot of broth from the stone and raising it toward my lips. No more than a moment did I hesitate, greatly displeased with the need for assistance, but I needed the provender so I could be on my way. I therefore drank the broth with my eyes upon the pot, pushing away thinly insistent thoughts of humiliation, giving no heed to the strong pleasure which fairly hummed from Mehrayn. I had no understanding of the pleasure males felt from doing a warrior in such an odd manner, yet was I certain of my dislike of it.
With all of the broth within me, Mehrayn then took up the nilno, which had been cut small as though in anticipation of difficulty on my part to do the thing for myself. Indeed would I have had difficulty in wielding a dagger, yet did I dislike such solicitous reminder of supposed helplessness. Jalav was a warrior and war leader of the Midanna, and well able was she to see to her own well-being! As Mehrayn looked within the pot for a cut to his liking, it came to me that the broth was all I was then able to hold; the nilno would turn my insides about, therefore it was best left behind me.
“I find I have no stomach for further provender,” I informed Mehrayn the while I rose unsteadily to my feet. Though I seldom used my hands to assist me, just then their aid would not have been unwelcome. “When hunger returns to me upon the trail, I shall hunt and feed my fill.”
“Trail?” echoed Mehrayn sharply, looking up quickly. “Hunt? What nonsense do you speak? You cannot take to the trail with your hands in ribbons.”
“I may do no other thing.” I shrugged, looking about with some small difficulty among the sack and kegs. “Where have my sword and dagger been put? I shall require them upon my journey. ”
“Wench, you journey nowhere save in return to this fur!” the male growled, putting aside the pot and straightening to the fullness of his height. “You have no need of weapons you are unable to wield, solely do you have need of rest and care so that you may be restored! To speak of taking to the trail now is idiocy, an idiocy I shall not allow!”
“There is naught you may say upon the matter,” I told him, gesturing aside the foolishness of his prattle. “Still do I ride in the name of Mida, and no mortal male may stand in my path. Go and fetch my weapons at once, and think only upon your word in regard to my warriors. They must be released as soon as they are able to ride, for we will require all of their swords when the strangers have come.”
I turned my back upon the lowering look he gave me, tossed my hair back from about my arms, and took myself unsteadily toward the metal-bound, wooden door.
“Should it be your expectation that I shall leap to obey your commands, you are destined to find disappointment, O war leader of Midanna,” came the angry words from behind me. “I do not leap to obey foolish girl-children, merely do I ignore their chatter and see to that which must be done. Return to this fur immediately, else shall I return you to it!”
“No longer have I the time to dally with males!” I snapped. “There has already been far too much of such idle foolishness, for which I have paid a high price in loss and pain! Should it become necessary to pay further, I may well fail to survive to do as I must! I will not see my Midanna leaderless and my Hosta left captive to males, solely by cause of my lack of sense of duty! Now, where are my weapons?”
“Woman, you speak utter nonsense!” Mehrayn exclaimed, more annoyed. “To consider your actions the cause of all that has occurred is the height of idiocy! To believe that you must take yourself into the forests this very moment, wounded and alone, is even greater idiocy! What will become of your wenches when you find yourself unable to defend against the prowlers of the forests? Or when you discover you are unable to hunt for the sustenance you require? You will fall a final time with none to know of it, nothing accomplished.”