“Maybe. Or maybe your mom put it in there for you to find it.”
“That sounds like a huge stretch. And how would my mom even get a lamp into a box of my dad’s old stuff? It doesn’t make any sense.”
Her gaze glides to me. “I asked Grandma Stephy why the box was there and she said it your dad asked her to store it for her.”
“Which means he probably put it there.” I look down at the photo and swallow hard. We look so happy together. Happy. God, I want to feel it again, how I felt in this photo. “Maybe he’s still in love with her, and that’s why he hid it.”
“But that doesn’t explain why he won’t tell you about her,” she points out. “Or why you lived with her for three years before she gave you up.”
My lungs ache as I struggle to get air. “Maybe that’s because she died. Maybe he took me in because she died, and he keeps this photo because he wants to hold onto her memory.”
“That’s deep, Isa.” She thrums her fingernails on top of the wheel, frowning. “Maybe a little too deep for your dad.”
“Who knows how deep my dad is?” Tears prickle in the corners of my eyes. “I don’t know him.”
“No one really does when you think about it. He’s practically secluded himself from the entire family.”
She’s right. No one really knows my dad, except for maybe Lynn, who practically controls his every move. I wonder if at one time my mom knew him, though. Like really knew him. Were they happy? How did they end up together? Did she make him laugh? Did he make her smile? Was he the one who took the picture? Did the three of us ever spend time together?
All questions I may never get the answers to.
I smash my lips together as I stare at the photo.
Who are you? Where did you go?
How do I find you?
I tuck the photo into my pocket, say goodbye to Indigo, and then climb out of the car. Kai doesn’t get out right away, so I open the back door and give him a little shake. His eyelashes flutter open and he blinks at me, disoriented.
“We’re home,” I tell him softly.
He sticks out his hand and wiggles his fingers. “Help me up.”
I grab his hand and tug on his arm. He slides to the edge of the seat and ducks out, bumping his head on the way.
“Ow.” He rubs his head, frowning. “The sad thing is I didn’t even feel it.”
“Then why’d you say ow for?” I tease him as I give Indigo another wave and close the door.
She backs away, her headlights vanishing as she turns onto the road.
“Because it seemed necessary,” Kai replies, belatedly answering my question. He hikes down the driveway, weaving back and forth.
Concerned he’s not going to make it, I hurry after him as he heads for the sidewalk. But right at the last second, he skips to the side and bounds over the fence, clipping his boot on the top bar. His knees bang the fence and he lands on the other side on his back.
“Shit.” I rush over to him and swing my leg over the fence.
I must be drunker than I thought, because climbing over is a lot more complicated than it should be. But I manage without falling then rush to Kai’s side, kneeling in the grass beside him.
His eyes are closed and he’s lying still with his arm draped over his stomach.
“Are you okay?” I ask, and panic when he doesn’t respond. I lean over him and cup his scruffy cheek, trying to remember if he hit his head. “Kai, can you hear me?”
“No, I think you need to lean a little bit closer,” he whispers. Then his eyes pop open and a lazy half grin spreads across his face. “Hey.”
“Hey.” I exhale, relaxing. “You scared me.”
“It was just a little fall.”
“Did you hit your head?”
“I don’t think so.” His nose twitches as strands of my hair tickle his face. “Your hair smells good. Like cookies.”
“I’m surprised it doesn’t smell like beer and sweat.” I start to move back, but he combs his fingers through my hair and draws me closer.
“No, don’t go,” he whispers, his fingers finding my cheek.
I realize a second too late what he wants to do, and the lag in my thought process gives his lips just enough time to reach mine.
I gasp against his mouth as he urges my lips apart with his tongue. Warmth pulls through my veins, steals the air from my lungs, and sends explosions of heat through my body.
Holy hell almighty. So that’s what kissing is about?
But right as I kiss him back, headlights shine across us as a car pulls into the driveway.
I trip to my feet and scoot back from him as reality sets in. Oh. My. God. I just kissed Kai.
Kai sighs, pushing onto his elbows. “Well, this is going to suck.”
At first, I think he’s referring to the kiss, but as he gets to his feet, he mutters, “Isa, I’m so sorry you have to see this.” Then he places himself in front of me, as if he’s protecting me from something.
Before I can ask, the headlights turn off. I peek over my shoulder as I hear the doors slam. The only light around is from a few street and porch lights, and the moon shining in the sky above us. I can barely make out his parents’ silhouettes, but I can feel the tension in the air.
“What the hell are you doing out here?” Kai’s dad asks as he stares Kai down with his arms crossed.
“I just got back from somewhere,” Kai says, sounding so unsure of himself, so unlike the Kai I know.
“Do you realize how late it is?” his mother asks. “No, I don’t even want to hear you try to lie your way out of this. Of course you know how late it is. But just like always, you don’t care if you worry us.”
“You were looking for me?” Kai asks, surprised.
“No. We were at an event,” his mother replies curtly. “But what if we had been looking for you? Imagine how worried we would’ve been.”
“Yeah, I don’t think you would’ve been that concerned.” Kai yawns and then shakes his head, getting sleepy again.
“Are you drunk?” His mother huffs, tapping her foot against the concrete.
Kai doesn’t even try to lie his way out of it. “I’m sorry.”
“Dammit, Kai. How many times have I told you if you’re going to act like a loser then don’t come home,” his dad snaps. “Why do you have to be such a fuck-up? Kyler never put us through this shit. Why can’t you be more like him, instead of such a fucking loser all the time? Why don’t you try making our lives simple, instead of so damn hard all the time? Fuck!” His dad kicks the tire.
“Because then we wouldn’t get to have these little chats of ours,” Kai mumbles under his breath.
“Get your damn ass in the house,” his dad growls as he points to the door. “Right now, before I make you.”
Sighing, Kai gives me a little push back toward the fence before he walks toward the house with his shoulders hunched. I slink into the shadows, wondering what will happen if they see me. Luckily, they seem too distracted by Kai. His dad scolds him the entire way to the back steps then slaps him upside the back of his head as they disappear inside.
Poor Kai. I feel so bad for him. He sounded so beaten down, like he’d heard the speech a million times. It reminds me so much of the way I react to situations, so I know how terrible he’s probably feeling right now. I want to go knock on the door and give him a hug, but know it’ll probably just upset his parents more.
I make a promise to myself that even if things are awkward tomorrow, which I’m guessing after the kiss they will be, that I’ll give him that hug or something.
I DRANK MORE than I thought at the party, and end up spending almost the entire next day in bed. I keep having the same dream, where someone sneaks into my room while I’m sleeping and stares down at me in my bed, holding a paintbrush. Around six o’clock or so, I wake up and realize where the dream came from. The second I open my eyes and fully come out of dreamland, my nostrils are assaulted by paint fumes. I sit up, look around for where the smell is coming from, and then smile.