"What was that?"
"She used to say, ‘Honey, you sure can pick ‘em.’ Too bad she isn’t here to meet you." Once again, Sam doubled over with laughter, clutching her side.
Finally, she sobered. Brushing her thick hair back out of her face, Sam leaned over Per and gently ran her fingertips down one side of his face and across his lips.
"I was very happy just now." She said softly then shook her head bewilderedly. "Doesn’t make any sense does it?"
"Why do you feel there must always be logic in all things?" Per asked as he pulled her close to him. "Feelings are never logical, that much I have learned."
They lay intertwined, each with their own thoughts, until the pale walls of the bedroom began to turn a faint lavender hue from the rising sun.
Sam stirred, whimpering incoherently in her sleep. Per gently stroked her hair, trying to soothe her. Startled out of her sleep, Sam sat up clutching the blanket to herself in fright.
"My God, Per," she exclaimed, "I’ve had the most horrible dream ...... I dreamed the world is coming to an end!"
Slowly, Sam’s eyes cleared and focused as she finally awoke fully. With complete consciousness came the realization that it had not, after all, been a dream.
Suddenly, time mattered a great deal to Sam.
Clutching Per’s arm, she cried, "Is this it? Will it be today? Please, tell me!" she begged desperately.
Chapter 39
Seagulls streaked across the cloudless sky, which gleamed a deep azure in the midmorning light. Perched on a rocky outcropping overhanging the Atlantic, Sam stared up at them. They seemed so far away. She raised her left arm high .....
stretching her fingers as far as she could ..... but she didn’t even come close to touching them.
They flew so far that they almost completely vanished into the distant horizon, but then abruptly changed course and came back her way. For a time, Sam concentrated entirely on the birds and their ostensibly random flight patterns.
She emptied her mind of everything else.
Per had remained behind in the house while Sam took a walk out to Burnt Coat Harbor. He knew that more than anything right now, she was in need of some time alone. Standing at the kitchen counter making coffee, Per closed his eyes for a moment and clearly saw what Sam saw. He wanted to go to her, but knew he could not. She could only come to terms with what was about to happen by herself.
There was nothing more he could do for her right now.
Eventually, Sam tired of watching the gulls. They seemed to compose images of peacefulness and serenity. All false, of course. Nothing in this world would ever be peaceful or serene again. There would be no more chances. Per had been clearly emphatic about that.
Reluctantly, Sam turned her thoughts inward, replaying in her mind Per’s harsh words of judgment from the day before. The thing was, as desperately as she would have liked to, Sam could not find a strong basis to dispute his opinion of mankind. If anything, if she were to be absolutely objective about it, she would have to agree with his assessment. Over all, mankind sucked. Period. Oh sure, every once in a while a Buddha, Jesus Christ or Mother Tereasa would pop up and do a great deal to revive your opinion of humanity for a time. But soon enough it would be back to the usual dictators and despots, interested only in squeezing the proverbial lifeblood out of their own people simply in order to get theirs.
However, Sam realized, if she were completely honest with herself she would have to admit that Per was accurate about something else as well. Horrendous as your run of the mill dictator could be, this was only one person out of thousands or millions at any given time ..... and it was the thousands and millions who should have counted.
It was the world community itself who was in the wrong ..... and always had been.
The human race, with all it’s marvelous scientific and technological achievements, would never be able to put down all their differences and learn to work together in order to solve their issues. Let’s face it, she thought, achievements of the heart were merely not considered important enough for the collective benefit of man.
Grabbing up her sweatshirt, Sam headed back to the path that would take her home.
She picked her way carefully over first rocks and then brambles until she had reached the top of the cliff that looked over Burnt Coat Harbor. She stood for a moment in order to catch her breath and gazed out at the beauty of the scenery for miles before her.
There was one more thing that she still needed to face up to. When she had asked Per ‘will it be today?’ and had continued to press him for an answer, he had at length given her one.
Shit, she thought, this could really ruin your whole day if you let it.
Chapter 40
Psychologically, Happy had to admit that he had sunk pretty low. Even by his standards. No one would believe his story of spaceships and a shot-in-the-head alien. What the hell, he thought, having another pull off the bottle.
"You believe me, don’t you boy? Hell, you saw the ship for yourself!" Consoling himself that at least his dog believed him, Happy gave Spike a good rubbing behind the right ear. Spike whined appreciatively and rolled over onto his back hoping for a vigorous belly rub as well.
Grunting from the effort as he bent forward, Happy obliged him. "You’re a good old boy," he said fondly in a gruff voice, "and I’m going to miss you."
He knew the end could come at any time now. He didn’t suppose there would be a warning first or anything like that. No, they had told him it would be quick and merciful. Probably over with in a blink of an eye.
Well, at his age it was no surprise to be thinking of death anyway, he decided.
It was just strange to think of everyone else in the world checking out with him at the same time. What was it Wanda used to say about death? He remembered now.
She used to say that death was nothing more than the failure of living. Guess that’s about as accurate a description as I could come up with on my own, Happy thought.
He really had no concrete beliefs in the existence of either a heaven or a hell.
Happy had to admit to having never been much of a religious man. Not that he didn’t believe in God, he quickly assured himself. He’d just never been very big on all that folderol that seemed to go along with belonging to a church. No sir, Happy’s cathedral had always been the outdoors. For over eighty years every time he had gone into the woods; gotten his fishing line wet, or slipped his boat into the water, he’d gone to church in his mind. To a fellow like Happy, nature and spirituality were one and the same.
Even so, he felt a shiver of dread pass through him. Oh, not for himself. Hell, he guessed he was ready to go anytime. No, it was for all the young who hadn’t had a chance to live yet. To enjoy life. Now they never would.
"It’s a pity ... a Goddamn pity, that’s what it is," he confided to Spike in a voice beyond sad.
For a time Happy sat peacefully by Spike, giving him the belly rubs that he loved and looking out at Jericho Bay. Jesus, it was sure pretty out there, he sighed. I’ve been a lucky man to have woken up to that view almost every morning of my life. Absentmindedly he lit up his pipe, puffing away to get it going.
Then he was struck by, for him, what was an odd thought. Has my life been meaningful?
The question so startled him that he paused in mid-puff. But the answer never did come to him even though he waited awhile, so instead he turned to the dog and said, "How about another beer, boy?"
Chapter 41
Kevin Dodge was loosing his patience. Something he didn’t have a great deal of to begin with.
"Heh!" he shouted to his wife, "Think we could do this in my lifetime?"
The boys all giggled. Dad was funny when he lost his temper. They never knew what would come out of his mouth next.