“So. You wanna do it?” he said, walking closer. Behind me, I caught Leann’s amused giggle. For all my aloofness, I suspected that she knew what I thought of Ransom; she had caught me more than once staring after him when he’d hung around the studio with Tristian. But just then, my boss’s laugh barely registered. I couldn’t make my focus move past Ransom’s question.
“What?”
That bata grinned, moved his gaze down my body again like he knew where my thoughts had gone but wouldn’t call me on it. “Help my mom out. She can’t get around that well and my little brother is, well. He’s almost two.”
Be around that family? With the chance that Ransom, demon to every female libido, could drop by without notice at any time? Running into him at the studio was one thing. Being in his home? Me zanmi, non. “I don’t think…”
“Come on, he’s not that bad and he’s looks just like me so he’s irresistible.” I guess Ransom thought his joke was funny. He smiled, wide and flirty, likely thinking that pretty face was going to have me agreeing. But when I could only manage to blink back at him, trying not to look too long at that thick bottom lip, some of his confidence dimmed and the smile lowered.
“Um, I’ll think about it.” My single focus at that moment was on retreating. No fighting needed. I wanted away from Ransom and that tempting smile. That thing should be illegal. Leann didn’t hide her laugh when I waved the student list at her or try to stop me as I grabbed my bag off the chair. “I’ll start on this tomorrow. I’m gonna be late for work if I don’t leave now.”
Her laughter quieted to a chuckle, and she grinned, falling into her seat as if my rushing out was the funniest thing she’d seen in a long while. I didn’t bother to shut her up and barely managed to squeeze around Ransom’s ridiculous body as I left the office.
Away, away, away, drummed in my head, a small mantra that propelled me out of the hallway and into the back exit. The stairs behind the building were just to my right and I relaxed a little, thinking that those stairs meant freedom, and the safety of the small loft at the top of the building that I called home. But I should have known better than to be so sure that I’d be able to make a clean break. That’s just not how my life has ever gone. Three steps up, and my name off Ransom’s lips stopped me.
“Aly, hey, hold up a second.” He was right behind me on the steps. I could almost feel that heavy focus boring into my back. Even on the bottom step, Ransom was taller than me and I felt the comforting warmth from his massive chest on the back of my neck. Another step up and I turned, watched as he looked at me as though I was something weird and freakish, then he looked up the staircase like something about it seemed familiar. That didn’t bother me, really, but the genuine confusion and the way he tilted his head like really focusing on me would somehow give him clarity about what had me running, stopped my retreat.
I backed up another step, trying to put as much space between us as I could.
“Did I offend you or something?”
“Sorry?”
“You didn’t even crack a smile.” Ransom moved his massive shoulders in a shrug and my attention dragged a bit on the slow movement. “That’s not usual.”
Feeling like a scared idiot, I took a breath and managed to reclaim my calm. “Usual for who?”
“I just…” He wasn’t trying to charm me anymore and just then, when Ransom stretched his neck, looking hesitant, I saw a glimpse of the man I’d been with at Summerland’s. The decent guy who was just trying to help. The tension in his eyes eased and when he spoke, his tone was light, almost shy. “My mom is kind of desperate, though she’d never admit it, and with school and practice and everything, I just can’t be there for her like I’d like.”
Honestly, I felt bad for him, for all of them. I got it, the whole wanting to help out your family thing, but I’d spoken to Ransom for less than five minutes and already felt like leap frogging at him like a skank. I couldn’t imagine taking care of his little brother and even pretending to be sane if he was hanging around all the time. There had to be another option. Ransom continued to stare, looking at me as though I could save his family a lot of grief. “What about your dad?”
Kona Hale. Me zanmi, that beautiful man gave Ransom those big shoulders and too-perfect smile. Like everyone else in the country, I’d heard about Kona and Keira’s lives. The media had painted them as something out of a chick flick. That video, well, the media had jumped all over it, even though it had been old, had happened years earlier. Had made their lives a living hell until the furor died down and the gossip mongers had moved on to something else. That poor family.
Ransom squeezed the bridge of his nose, like he needed to stop a headache from crushing him. “His paternity leave doesn’t start for another month. Please,” he said, reaching out and taking my wrist. I was too startled to move. His fingers were large with big knuckles and curved nails. Watching them on my skin, feeling how sure, how confidently he held onto me shot back the memory of us together. Couldn’t he feel how my pulse was racing? Those fingers had been inside me, had pleasured me right there in that public place, had made me forget myself, and just then I realized I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t be anywhere near where he might be.
Ransom didn’t strike me as the kind of guy who’d settle for a no, though, so I didn’t bother. I’d make an excuse later, but at that moment, I just couldn’t take him touching me for one more minute, giving me that expression that bordered on begging. That look alone could make me scream yes.
He didn’t stop me when I pulled out of his touch or when I took another step up. “Yeah. I’ll um, I’ll give her a call. Leann gave me her number.” That was a total lie, but I’d say just about anything to keep him from staring at me like that.
God help me, I thought when the smile returned to his face. “Okay. Thanks. We appreciate it…”
My feet running up the steps cut him off and I slipped inside my apartment before he could tell me how much my “yes” would help his family. I felt bad enough for lying. I really didn’t want to hear him say it. Back against my door once I slammed it shut, I closed my eyes, trying to breathe, to focus on anything but the quickening in my chest and the twinge of my skin where Ransom had held my wrist.
5
Football is brutal.
It’s not every man that can handle it, but God knows every man wishes he could. It’s why Sundays are sacred during the season. It’s the reason grown men teach their sons to catch and throw, hug that pigskin close to their chests before those poor kids have really gotten the concept of running. It’s the battlefield for every boy who wanted to be a superhero but instead became an adult.
Laying back, my knee icing in the locker room, I thought that I wasn’t really edging too close to that adulthood like I should be. But hell, neither had my father. It was the game, the drills and calls I was supposed to be focused on out on that field. It was the nods, the subtle gestures from my teammates that I was supposed to be watching for as we practiced.
Football is especially brutal when your head isn’t in the game. Mine had been somewhere else, distracted by my worry, the stress of classes, the pressure to prove myself. It was the memory of soft skin, brown, not pale, and the crushing guilt I felt for thinking about her that had me missing Richard diving right at me.
My knee was twisted. The injury was so minor Dad almost let me finish out our drills when I landed under Richard’s sweaty grunts. He might be Kona Hale, new Defensive Coach at CPU, but he was still my father. Sent me straight to the team doctor.