42
Sunlight streamed through the window into the hospital room, which was brightly colored by bouquets of flowers. They’d come from around the world. So had cards, e-mails, and messages online. Thousands of strangers had sent prayers and condolences to her. It was easy to forget sometimes that a book went out into the world and touched people’s lives, and Lisa was overwhelmed by the many readers who had reached back to her in the past week. They were like her family.
She sat patiently as Laurel checked her blood pressure and her pulse and listened to the beat of her heart. Everything was normal. She was on antianxiety medication and would be for a while, but the psychosis had receded. She was back in the real world, dealing with the loss of her son. There was a hole in her heart that would never be filled, but she had learned something in these days that she’d never understood before. She wasn’t alone.
“It’s odd,” Lisa murmured. “I almost miss them.”
“Who?” Laurel asked.
“All the characters from Thief River Falls. People like Mrs. Lancaster. Tom Doggett. Even a terrible person like Liam. They’re all back in the book, but for a little while, they were real to me. They were alive. They’d been in my head for years, and suddenly they were actually there in front of me.”
“It’s a strange kind of gift.”
“Everything got mixed up in ways I don’t understand. The real world and my fantasies.”
“How so?”
“Well, Fiona Farrell was just a character in the book. She doesn’t exist. And yet in my head, she was Danny’s sister, even though Danny was an only child. I don’t know why my mind put it together like that.”
Laurel smiled. “I guess you can probably thank Denis for that. He was a part of both worlds. He’s real, but you put him in your book, too. So your brain blended reality and delusion.”
“I guess so.” Lisa was quiet, and then she added, “I kept seeing white.”
Laurel’s brow crinkled with puzzlement. “What?”
“Everything my head made up had something white in it. That was what made it different from the things that were really there. After a while, it seemed like everything became white as I went deeper and deeper. I wonder why.”
Laurel tugged on the shoulder of her coat. “Lab coats would be my guess. Masks. I suspect that to your brain, white became the color of doctors. You began to associate white with the hospital. This is where you lost Harlan. Everything your mind invented was taking you right back here.”
“The brain is a scary thing.”
“It can be.”
Lisa calmed herself with a slow breath. “Did you tell Curtis I was sorry for whacking him?”
“I did,” Laurel replied with a grin. “He’s fine now. I think he actually enjoyed being a bad guy. You may have to write him into your next book.”
“I can do that.”
“Me, too, in fact. I wouldn’t mind seeing the name Laurel March in one of your novels.”
“Okay, but no villains for you,” Lisa said. “Maybe a slinky, sexy spy or something like that.”
“Deal.”
Laurel squeezed her shoulder. She headed for the doorway of the hospital room, and as she left, she had to make way for Noah, who was burdened down with more flowers and a bag stuffed with cards. Noah gave Lisa a smile, and she could see Madeleine in the curl of his lips and the twinkle in his eyes. And her father. And their brothers. And Harlan. Everyone who was gone was really still here.
“Hey, Lis,” Noah said, his chirpy voice sounding like when they were kids. “More fan mail. You want me to write back to some of these people for you? You’re going to need some help.”
Lisa shook her head. “No, I’ll do it myself.”
“That’s a lot of letters.”
“That’s okay. I want to do every one.”
Noah dropped down onto the window bench next to her. “Sorry I was late getting here today. Janie and I are getting settled in at the old house. Whenever you’re ready to blow this place, you can stay there, too. I mean, unless you want to go back to your house in Lake Bronson.”
Lisa shook her head firmly. “No. If I learned anything, it’s that I belong in Thief River Falls.”
“Well, who says you can’t go home again?” Noah replied. “Hey, by the way, I passed Denis and Gillian Farrell on my way in. Did they really come to see you?”
“They did. Little miracles are everywhere this week.”
“How was it?”
“Honestly, we all cried together. We cried for Danny, and we cried for Harlan. It was good. Not only that, prepare yourself for the fact that we are actually invited to Thanksgiving dinner in the Farrell household this year. You, me, Janie.”
“Get out.”
“It’s true. Denis apologized for shutting us out all these years. I don’t know if Gillian made him say that, but it sounded sincere. He even admitted that he thought it was rather badass of me to turn him into a homicidal maniac in Thief River Falls. He asked if there was going to be a sequel.”
“And is there?” Noah asked.
Lisa rolled her eyes. “Oh, no. That book was a stand-alone, believe me. After this week, I may start writing romance novels.”
Noah looked away toward the door. He saw something in the hallway that Lisa couldn’t see from where she was, and his face flushed. “Janie’s here,” he told her. “She can’t wait to meet you.”
“I can’t wait to meet her, too,” Lisa replied. “I love the idea of you getting married, you know. It’s a new beginning, and that’s what we need.”
“Well, we sort of have a surprise, too. I didn’t want to tell you before now. I wanted to wait to make sure it would be okay.”
“Is it a good thing?”
“It’s a very good thing.”
“Okay, what is it?”
Noah waved at his fiancée outside the hospital room. Janie came in — carrying more flowers balanced in both arms — and Lisa understood the surprise immediately. She found her eyes drawn to Janie’s swollen belly. Lisa didn’t hear much of anything else after that. She was vaguely aware of Janie talking to her and telling her how much she loved her books and how much she loved her brother. But Lisa just kept staring at Janie and thinking about the baby inside her, and finally, Noah and Janie both noticed that tears had begun to fall down Lisa’s cheeks.
“Hey,” Noah said, reaching out to grab her hand. “Hey, are you okay?”
Lisa nodded. She was crying, but this wasn’t sadness. This was something she hadn’t felt in forever. Joy. She was overjoyed.
“I’m so happy for you two,” she managed to say.
Noah beamed. “Thanks, Lis.”
“Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?” she asked.
Janie glanced at Noah and then smiled at Lisa to give her the news. “A boy.”
“And actually,” Noah went on, “we already have a name picked out. He’s going to be Danny.”
Lisa just kept crying. It felt wonderful. “Danny,” she said.