Parker was a slim man, tall and serious. His hair had once been dark until hit by an early frost, and that made him difficult to put an age to. His face was handsome without being arresting, the kind that the eye would glance over, rather than rest on. Perfect for the line of work he’d chosen. And yet, if you looked closely enough, you saw something more in Parker, a depth, a strength, a watchfulness.
He was wearing a dark single-breasted suit with the jacket unbuttoned, and a narrow tie. I was glad I’d taken the time to put my business face on and change out of my scruffs. Wool trousers and a silk shirt in the obligatory New York black, the collar high enough to hide my more obvious scars.
“Charlie,” Parker said, steering me towards one of the leather armchairs near the desk. “Take a seat. You want coffee?”
A gentle accent, not immediately placeable, the U.S. equivalent of classless. I’d heard him add twang or blur to it, depending on the company he was keeping. A natural chameleon. There was a lot about him that reminded me of an older Sean. Perhaps that was why Parker had offered him a partnership in the first place.
I shook my head and he moved across to the filter machine he had permanently on the go in the corner. “You sure? It’s Jamaican Blue Mountain—just in.”
His taste in expensive coffee was practically his only vice—or the only one I’d found out about, at any rate. He had fresh-roasted beans delivered by the pound from McNulty’s aromatic old-fashioned store in Greenwich Village.
“So,” I said, wanting to take the offensive rather than wait for him to do so, “you’ve spoken to Nick.”
Lifting the coffee cup to his lips only partially obscured the quick grimace, his mouth twisting up at the corner.
“Yeah.” He arched an eyebrow. “He’s not a happy guy.”
“He should have kept his hands to himself,” I shot back.
“Maybe so,” he allowed, “but you coulda been a little more, ah, diplomatic in giving him the brush-off.”
I shrugged to cover the fact I’d already realized that. “Maybe.”
Parker sighed and put the cup down, regaining his seat like a judge about to pass sentence.
“Close protection is all about attitude, Charlie,” he said, sounding tired now. “Mind-set. You gotta see the big picture, weigh all the options. React to a high-threat situation—not just fast but smart, too.”
Here it comes … .
There was a hollow panic rising under my rib cage. I swallowed it down along with my pride, and admitted, “I do recognize that what I did this morning probably didn’t exactly qualify as smart.”
For a moment Parker regarded me with eyes that seemed kindly, but missed nothing and forgave less.
“No,” he said. “It wasn’t.”
I waited, heart rate beginning to pick up, for the blade to fall.
Then he smiled.
“But I’ll bet it was damned funny,” he said.
My shoulders dropped a fraction.
“Well … yes,” I said faintly. “Yes, I suppose it was.”
The smile broadened so that his whole face joined in, and slipped into a chuckle that he attempted to dilute with another mouthful of coffee.
“Nick’s a nice guy, but he’s a wanna-be,” Parker said. “Always dropping hints about how he’d be a good guy for me to have on the team. I guess now he’s seen what a real pro can do, he’ll shut the hell up about it and I’ll finally get some peace.”
I sat there, blankly, wondering if I’d really just done what I thought I’d done. Got away with it.
“What about my assessment?” I said, still looking for the catch. “I didn’t finish it and—”
“Charlie,” Parker cut in, shaking his head. “Way I heard it, you just threw a guy nearly twice your size and weight halfway across a room. I think it’s safe to say you’re fit enough to get back to work, don’t you?”
I still hadn’t come up with a suitable reply when there was a perfunctory knock on the door. It opened without waiting for permission and I knew without turning around who’d just walked in.
Parker looked over my shoulder at the new visitor and his face lit up again.
“Hey, Sean,” he said. “Come on in. I was just telling Charlie she’s all out of excuses.”
“Mm,” Sean said, “I would have thought she is.”
I turned then, alerted by the coolness in his tone, and found Sean watching me closely. I knew him, on every kind of level, better than I’d known anyone, but at times like these I didn’t know him at all. He was impossible to second-guess. I felt that near-black gaze like liquid on my skin.
Even years after he’d first terrified me as the toughest instructor on the Special Forces training course I’d crashed out of in such spectacular fashion, he still thoroughly unnerved and unsettled me.
Deliberately, I turned away, just in time to see Parker’s eyes flicking speculatively between the two of us. He knew we had a relationship outside work—of course he did—but he’d never asked questions and we’d never given him cause to. A state of affairs I didn’t intend to disturb.
“She needs a further assessment,” Sean said now.
“Sean, I’m okay.”
“Physically, yes,” he agreed evenly.
“Yes,” Parker said, regarding me carefully. “I get what you mean.”
Sean crossed the office floor, making almost no noise on the tiles. He leaned his shoulder against the window reveal to Parker’s left and folded his arms. Like Parker, he was wearing a dark suit and looked as at home in it as he once had in army camouflage. There was probably only ten years between them, but at that moment they could almost have been father and son. Both men eyed me silently, as though I was suddenly going to crack open for them to read.
“Well, would somebody mind spelling it out for me?” I said with a touch of bite. “What? You think I’m going to run away the next time someone points a gun at me?”
“No,” Sean said. “I think you’re more likely to make sure they don’t get the chance.”
“Overreact, you mean?”
“It’s a possibility.” He gave a negligent lift of one of those wide shoulders. Sometimes, for a thug, Sean could be very elegant. “We have to be sure—and so do you.”
My father’s words were suddenly loud and mocking inside my head. You’ve already proved you can’t be trusted to do a job without injuring yourself and others. What possible use could they have for you?
“There’s one way to find out,” I said, as calmly as I could manage, chin rising to meet the challenge. “Put me back out there. You’ll soon know if I’m up to it.”
“Hey, whoa,” Parker said, holding his right hand straight up, side on, and tapping his left flat across the top of it to form a T. “Time out, guys.” He didn’t raise his voice, but he rarely had to.
“For starters,” he went on, glancing at me, “there’s no way I’m going to use any of our clients to find out if you’re gunshy, Charlie. Not that I think for a moment that you are, but it would a real stupid move on my part, okay?”
I made a conscious effort to let my hackles subside.
“Okay,” I agreed meekly.
“You’ve been doing great behind the scenes these last few months. Bill tells me the guys reckon nobody runs a team like you do. You’re terrific on logistics. You don’t sweat the small stuff, but you don’t overlook anything, either. And you always remember to feed them.”
The praise surprised me, not least because of its source. “But I don’t want to be—”
“—stuck behind a desk all day,” Parker finished for me. He indicated the office we were in with a sweep of his hand. “Trust me,” he said wryly. “I know all about that one.”
“There’s a course coming up in Minneapolis next month,” Sean said, drawing our eyes back to him. “Stress Under Fire. I’ve already booked you a place on it.”