Lilly rolled her eyes, but she didn't say anything.
Kevin gazed up into the tree. "Hey, girl. Come on down." He extended his arms. "Come here."
"We've been doing that for ages." Molly eyed his sweat-soaked T-shirt and running shorts. The hair on his bare legs was matted. How could he still look so gorgeous? "I'm afraid you'll have to climb up after her." She paused. "Unless you want me to do it."
"Of course not." He grabbed one of the lower branches and pulled himself up.
She couldn't quite contain her relish. "Your legs are going to get ripped to shreds."
He shimmied higher.
"If you slip, you could break your passing arm. This might end your whole career."
He was disappearing into the branches now, and she raised her voice. "Please come down! It's too dangerous."
"You're making more noise than the cat!"
"Let me get Troy."
"Great idea. The last time I saw him, he was down at the dock. And take your time."
"Do you think there are any tree snakes up there?"
"I don't know, but I'll bet you can find some in the woods. Go look." The branches rustled. "Come here, Marmie. Here, girl."
The limb where the yowling cat crouched was fairly thick, but he was a large man. What if it snapped and he really did injure himself? For the first time Molly's warning was genuine. "Don't climb out on that, Kevin. You're too big."
"Would you be quiet!"
Molly held her breath as he threw his leg over the limb about eight feet from where Marmie crouched. He scooted forward, making soothing noises to the cat. He'd just about reached her when Marmie stuck her nose in the air, hopped delicately to a lower branch, then proceeded to pick her way down the tree.
Molly watched in disgust as the traitorous cat reached the ground, then shot toward Lilly, who scooped her up and gave Molly a pointed look. She didn't say anything to Kevin, however, who was climbing back down.
"How long did you tell me she was stuck up there?" he asked as he dropped.
"It's, uh, tough to keep track of time when you're terrified."
He studied Molly, his expression suspicious, then bent to examine a nasty scrape on the inside of his calf.
"I've got some ointment in the kitchen," she said.
Lilly stepped forward. "I'll get it."
"Don't do me any favors," Kevin snapped.
Lilly clenched her teeth. "You know, I'm getting really sick of your attitude. And I'm tired of biding my time. We're going to talk right now." She set down the cat.
Kevin was taken aback. He'd grown accustomed to the way she hadn't pressed him, and he didn't seem to know how to respond.
She jabbed her finger toward the side of the house. "We've postponed this long enough. Follow me! Or maybe you don't have the guts."
She'd waved a red flag in his face, and Kevin was quick to respond. "We'll see who has guts," he growled.
Lilly charged toward the woods.
Molly wanted to applaud, but she was glad she didn't because Lilly spun around to glare at her. "Don't touch my cat!"
"Yes, ma'am."
Lilly and Kevin headed off together.
Lilly heard the sounds of Kevin's footsteps rustling in the pine needles strewn over the path. At least he was following her. Three decades of guilt began to snuff out the temper that had finally given her the courage to force this confrontation. She was so sick of that guilt. All it had done was paralyze her, and she couldn't stand it any longer. Liam tormented her by appearing every morning for a breakfast she never felt like eating but couldn't seem to avoid. Molly wouldn't fit into the pigeonhole Lilly had assigned her. Kevin looked at her as if she were his worst enemy. It was too much. In the distance ahead, the trees gave way to the lake. She marched toward it, silently daring him not to follow. When she couldn't stand it any longer, she turned to confront him, not knowing until she spoke what she was going to say.
"I won't apologize for giving you up!"
"Why am I not surprised?"
"Sneer all you want, but have you once asked yourself where you'd be today if I'd kept you? What chance do you think you'd have had living in a roach-infested apartment with an immature teenager who had big dreams and no idea how to make them come true?"
"No chance at all," he said stonily. "You did the right thing."
"You're damn right I did. I made sure you had two parents who doted on you from the day you were born. I made sure you lived in a nice house where there was plenty to eat and a backyard to play in."
He gazed out at the lake, looking bored. "I'm not arguing. Are you about done with this, because I have things to do."
"Don't you understand? I couldn't come to see you!"
"It's not important."
She started to move closer, then stopped herself. "Yes, it is. And I know that's why you hate me so much. Not because I gave you away, but because I never answered your letters begging me to come to see you."
"I hardly remember. I was-what-six years old? You think something like that is still bothering me?" His air of studied indifference developed a bitter edge. "I don't hate you, Lilly. I don't care that much."
"I still have those letters. Every one you wrote. And they're soaked with more tears than you can imagine."
"You're breakin' my heart."
"Don't you understand? There was nothing I wanted to do more, but it wasn't allowed."
"This I've got to hear."
She finally had his attention. He came closer and stopped near the base of an old gnarled oak.
"You weren't six. The letters started when you were seven. The first was printed in block letters on yellow lined paper. I still have it." She'd read it so many times the paper had grown limp.
Dear Ant Lilly,
I know your my real mom and I love you very much. Could you come see me. I have a cat. His name is Spike. He is 7 to.
Love,
Kevin
Please don't tell my mom I wrote this leter. She mite cry.
"You wrote me eighteen letters over four years."
"I really don't remember."
She risked taking a few steps toward him. "Maida and I had an agreement."
"What kind of agreement?"
"I didn't give you to them casually. You can't believe that. We talked everything through. And I made long lists." She realized she was twisting her hands, and she let them fall to her sides. "They had to promise never to spank you, not that they would have anyway. I told them they couldn't criticize your music when you got to be a teenager, and they had to let you wear your hair however you wanted. Remember, I'd just turned eighteen." She gave him a rueful smile. "I even tried to make them promise to buy you a red convertible for your sixteenth birthday, but they wisely refused."
For the first time he smiled back at her. The movement was small, the slightest twitch at the corner of his mouth, but at least it was there.
She blinked, determined to get through this without shedding a tear. "One thing I didn't back down on, though-I made them promise to always let you follow your dreams, even if they weren't the same dreams they had for you."
He cocked his head, all pretense of indifference gone.
"They hated letting you play football. They were so terrified that you'd get hurt. But I held them to their promise, and they never tried to stop you." She could no longer meet his eyes. "All I had to do was give them one thing in exchange…"
She heard him move closer, and she looked up to see him step into a narrow shaft of sunlight.
"What was that?"
She could hear in his voice that he already knew. "I had to agree never to see you."
She couldn't look at him, and she bit her lip. "Open adoption didn't exist then, or if it did, I didn't know about it. They explained to me how easily confused children can get, and I believed them. They agreed to tell you who your birth mother was as soon as you were old enough to understand, and they sent me a hundred pictures over the years, but I could never visit you. As long as Maida and John were alive, you were to have just one mother."